First?

She's puny, so he can't be that tall either. And she seems to outweigh him, not gangsta. Her voice sounds like nails on a chalkboard, only not as creative.

wow for avril saying that she didnt care about desinger clothes and bags she sure has a lot of luis vuitton

Finally, something for Hilary Duff and Avril to bond over.

ok so maybe one luisvuitton thought i sawore but hey give me a break im on drugs :)

Uh, maybe he's being a GENTLEMAN and carrying her luggage for her? I don't know who this guy is, but if he offered to carry her luggage, then good on him.

They look like they should be working at Hot Topic.

In other news, who the fuck cares?

that purse looks like it could store a mexican family of 40 in it.

i ment saw more like i said im on drugs and the good kind :)

I'm starting to feel like the Superficial headquarters, a grandiose office building with a huge neon sign I'm sure, is based in Saskatoon, Canada. Because that's where exiting stories like these are fresh n' hot, hot, Hot off the press.
Other than that, I'd hit it.

Are these two effing hobbits? WTF? Aside from not having all that much talent, at least they can say that they are the most famous little people in the world (for the next five minutes anyway)

I'd rather look at Mariah Carey's fat ass taking a poop than Deryck Whibley any day. What a strange looking little guy...

Are they engaged?? Looks like she's got quite a rock on her finger.

Eh, not impressed. She's less annoying these days, but only because she's not putting out god-awful music.

http://www.wehateeverybody.com

It's not that the rock is that big, it's that her little person's fingers are so small.

Is it just me, or is he REALLY STRUGGLING with those bags? His arms look like they might snap like toothpicks!

He's 5'5".

They are engaged.

He used to date Paris Hilton. What does that say about Avril, that a guy can go from Paris to Avril in one move?

Did his parents really write the name "Deryck" on his birth certificate, or did he do that to himself later in life?

Wow, she must feel good to know that if she were attacked, this guy could really defend her. If they were attacked by an infant, or maybe a parakeet. Yea, that guy could probably kick a parakeet's ass. If the parakeet only had one wing and was still in a cage. And blind, or already dead.

He's like a short... whoever that kid is on One Tree Hill. The popular one, not the snobby one. Anyway, Deryck looks like him, only smaller.

I found Avril Lavigne passed out under a bridge at 31st and Main, and two hobos were taking turns urinating on her. I'm pretty sure it was her, because she smelled like a Canadian and was muttering the lyrics to "sk*er boi" while crying. And she had black nail polish on and nobody cared who the fuck she was.

Yeah, it was probably her.

The headline should read:

Avril Lavigne is a stupid cunt that no one cares about anymore

There. Next story please.

16

Ha ha, I knew a guy once who spelled his name Geph (for his "stage" name). Yeah. That's right.

We're not friends anymore.

Maybe it's just the snaggle teeth, but I think Avril looks alot like a German Shepard. More so before all the bleach, but she's very Rin Tin Tin.

Arf.

If you kicked the shit out of him and stole the adhesive Care Bears tattoo off his left arm, would that mean you had to carry her bags in his place?

To her credit, Avril is lugging around that GINORMOUS rock.

He looks like a total pussy trying to even lift that bag. He should have just pushed the suitcase down the steps.

somebody needs to show avril the positive correlation between her look getting more "girly and designer", and her declining record sales. somebody should also tell her she's ugly.

Hey, quit ragging on the way Canadians smell.

If all you ever ate was seal meat then you'd smell funny too. And my polar bear underpants are dryclean only, so I only change them once a week.

Shit - now OshGosh owns "Hot off the press".

My high school buddies and I are still mourning the loss of "word on the street".

I look at that guys arms and I think he's on the "Body by Smack" fitness program.

she looks as if she is smelling a particularly gruesome fart, doesn't she?

~j.

OMG!11111111 im frum canaduh. i smell liek fish adn beer!1 LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!11111

ROTFNWCA!!!!!!111111111111111111111111111111*

* rolling on the floor naked with clay aiken

27 - Hey, Mr Wonder Pants, you can't say "high school buddies", I own that too.

23
That tattoo DOES look awfully florescent, doesn't it?

P.S. was it these hobos that were pissing on her? (NSFW)

http://themot.org/gallery/d/3918-1/BumLove.jpg

she used to be hot...what the hell happened!!!

#26

Way to go BigJim, sticking up for us Canadians!

Though I don't like seal much....I prefer Moose.

I hope they do not marry. Unless of course they move to the African jungle where those Pygmy people live. Little people have little kids who grow up to have height complexes, and are generally extremely short acheivers. I don't want my tax dollars paying for therapy for yet another damn foreigner.

Is that Neil Patrick Harris?

I'm kidding. There is no way I would insult NPH. NPH is a god.

on one tree hill, who's the Popular One and the Snobby One?

In my book Lucas is the girly one and Nathan is the fugly one

My God, this is a boring "story". It would be more interesting to hear more about this dwarf convention they're going to, than just see them leave for it.

NO, those WEREN'T the hobos!!! That was my grandfather and my uncle and some dude I don't know. And I don't want to talk about it. And where the hell did you find that picture?

Also, why would one assume that "smelling like a Canadian" is a bad thing? Canadians smell nice, like pine trees and dark beer.

Except for Celine Dion, who smells like diarrhea. Because of her firecrotch. She doesn't count.

My God. Now that would be a story I would enjoy reading about on the Superficial...

'Celine Dion has explosive diarrhea while shopping'

Pfft... She could probably afford two of 'em.

She looks kinda constipated. That or the sun's in her eyes... but I like to think of her little dung bunker. That's me.

It's not that Canadians smell bad - it's their pointy eyes and bobble-heads and tiny, tiny penises that piss me off.

Those Canadians better not even fart or we will come up there and kick their Canuck asses! And most of them are half-French so you know they'll roll over and surrender the first chance they get.

Wow she is a snot.

Paris Hilton carries her own bags.

www.notinamillionyears.com

"And most of them are half-French so you know they'll roll over and surrender the first chance they get."

U FAIL

#45 - You have to carry your own bags when they're under your eyes.

On the top of the list of reasons why Avril Lavigne is a douche, is the fact that in every single one of her music videos there's some dude approaching her and she pushes him.

"Wait, I know. In this video, I want like, a guy, and he comes up to me and starts hitting on me, like, right in front of his girlfriend, and like, I shove him away!!!"

In other news there's that ugly designer bag. I'm pretty sure "designer" is a euphamism for "ridiculously bulky and hideous".

haha smells like a canadian. I'm a canadian, and I can attest that Canadians ALSO smell like maple syrup :)

I once had an american tell me that I looked american, and she was impresses that I spoke English so well. Seriously, I am Canadian, not a friggin ESKIMO.

Oh, and I am ashamed that Avril Lavigne is Canadian.

"hardcore-sk8r grl" has loius vitton luggage, lol.

...*yawn*

^
| and, yes, i am an illiterate small-dicked canadian

...drana...d'oh

Maybe the luggage isn't really that heavy...

Maybe Avril has carpal tunnel syndrome and can't move her hands that much...

Maybe she strained a muscle in her arm or back..

Or maybe she's becoming a little namby pamby diva cumdumpster.

The better looking she gets, the more prissy and girly acting she becomes.

So we hear nothing musical from Avril in yonks and she appears wearing a velour tracksuit and brandishing THE bag of the season whilst her predecessor, the ex-velour-tracksuited-handbag-toting skinny blonde, Miss P. Hilton, makes a 'record'. How very punk rock that Avril has decided to become the living retrospective example of Paris. That's progressive, man. Or is it regressive? Someone please explain.

Avril, stop bleaching your hair. It's lookin' like crap. Troll hair and velour track suits do not go together...on second thought, bleach away!

that bag is marc jacob's.

At least she finally has her hair out of her face.

Americans smell like flowers and fine perfume, as long as they're aryan, white, upperclass Americans with big penises. All other Americans smell like ass.

A white aryan? So I'm guessing there aren't any black aryans. Darn.

Paris Hilton's "perfume" smells like flowers (according to Paris Hilton).

"You smell like a baby prostitute" *sprays air freshener*

Black aryans smell like cinnamon. FACT.

which one is avril and which one is deryck? and who the hell taught these kids to spell...salad heads...

My god look at Mr. Chicken Bone Arms. Those arms are going to snap under the weight of those tiny bags. No better way to draw attention to your puniness than to put a tattoo right across you lacking bicep.

How come the sun light didn't burn these two? I always thought that was a myth about vampires. See Mulder was right, the truth is out there...............

@49: Eskimo = Alaska = American....... so your point is...........????

By the way, love that the "rebel girl" is now wearing bubble gum pink nail polish too.

God - pass the vodka. Quick!

I'm just laughing my ass off that this is the girl who spent so much time trying to convince us she was "punk" and so "hardcore", while she was busy doing jazz hands and singing "Sk8ter Boi". All of that bad attitude and black fingernail polish has only resulted in her looking like the third Hilton sister.

Damn, she is all kinda of fugly. She's fugly six ways from Sunday, Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday. Just an ugly beast.

#65 - I know! I totally agree with you! But.... a lot of americans seem to have the misconception that Canadians live in igloos and speak... eskimo (hence bigjims clever remark about polar bear underwear hehe)

#16 - Who hasn't f*cked Paris? This guy must be into dirty snatch cuz Avril is skanky too.

#22 - Don't insult German Shepherds like that. Mine is cuter than Avril, probably outweighs her at 100# and can sing better for sure.

I guess giant bondage purses are the hot accessory now. Aaanyway, they're a cute couple because they have the exact same size boobs.

That luggage is filled full of all the sex toys, panties and cheerleader outfits I made Avril use, while I spent 3 days grudge-fucking her on a spendid cocaine and pez binge. I made her pay for the champagne and the room, and I tied his sorry ass in the corner and made him watch, ala "Clockwork Orange". Although oddly, all he did was scream "Yeah Tranny, give it to that slut" and beg me to let him masturbate. I'm home now, and scrubbing my body with turpentine, I like the tingly feeling it give you.

Wow, I can't express how cool that is. I wish I had someone to carry around all my junk.

She looks like shit and they are both midgets. Next.

Not that I care about these two, but she looks like crap.

i think it's bull that she's not allowed to wear pink nail polish and carry designer luggage. is there a fucking rule somewhere that rebellious girls have to look butch? wtf!

Deryk = Der+Dick+Paris = Dare Dick

You do the math.

I hate that white trash upturned nose of hers.

I'm sure this was probably the last shoot the paparazzi will ever do of Avril. You know, not because they don't like her anymore but simply because they can't get the shutter to open up long enough to get her skin on film. She has gotten so white she almost can't be seen anymore. Good thing she has a frequent shopper's card at Hot Topic.

She's also...what's the phrase??? hmmm... oh yeah. She is not hot and looks like a rat with bleached blonde hair. Yeah, remember that old saying? I think my Grandpa used to say it back in the day.

HELLO HELLO ????????????????????????????????HELLO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DOESN'T ANYBODY ELSE IN THE WORLD NOTICE THAT SHE HAS AN ENGAGEMENT RING ON HER FINGER?????????????????????????????????
AM I MISSING SOMETHING???????????
IS SHE ENGAGED?????????

Deryck Whibley sounds like something coughed up by someone with bird flu. Since Sum 41 never managed to squeeze out that pivotal second hit, I'm pretty sure the asshole is going to be jazzed to have any media attention, even if it is footage of him being Avril Lavigne's bitch.

And for christ's sakes, it's rolly luggage. How hard is it to drag something? Maybe he should have practiced with his girlfriend first.

Someone is still taking pictures of her?

Avril is such a fucing sell-out its ridiculous. She should be hanged for being such a hypocrite.