May 22 2006Lindsay Lohan moves in on Stavros Niarchos

FIRST?

SECOND?

Superfish guy, I'm glad you didn't die over the weekend!

4th!!!!

But she's a fire crotch.

I'd hit it...

with a fire extinguisher.

First Second- Did you see you can get kicked off for this Why risk it? This is too important to live without.
To confirm this story is Stavy Nachos scatching his balls and screaming when he takes a piss?

I bet he has Burberry-scented balls and cocaine-flacored semen.

*flavored*

If someone has the free time, a little Paris herpes family tree would be nice-Paris to Nachos to Lohan to Wilmer-This thing would be larger than a tupperwear pyramid scheme

This is something I'd totally expect her do...especially if it's her worst enemy's ex...it's a fantastic idea to someone who's still stuck in high school mentality...go figure!

Well, she does have a seven foot Clitoris. That thing needs to be fed, in an hourly fashion.

*chop* *chop*

Oh, and uh....yuck.

Please never use the words 'clitoris' and 'chop' in the same post ever again...

::shudder::

B-Slim;

A 7' clitoris (the female clitoris) would be Awesome! You could invite all the neighbors over and use it like a slip and slide!

After all, she's poor, remember? She's only got 7 million. A girl's got to do what she needs to do to ensure her survival.

You can sliiiiiiip and sliiiide Ahhahahahahahaha ..oof sorry 'bout that #14

If we can't all come together and agree that anything that pisses Paris Hilton off is a good thing then I don't know what to believe in anymore!!

A 7' clitoris covered in freckles with kids taking turns sliding on it? That sounds like this recurring dream I have - but at the end I wake up and my panties are all wet. It's weird.

After Lindsey, Stavros has only Britney to hit and then all will be complete. He will have super celebrity herpes, the first since Warren Beatty, and can donate his thrice-poxed cock to science upon overdosing on Valtrex. These young celebs have not gone wild, but in all actuality are part of a nefarious plot to breed the most drug-resistant, ravaging form of herpes not seen since the fall of Rome. Should they succeed, this killer form of herpes may be contracted merely by standing next to an infected celeb. That's right, no safe paparatzi anywhere. George Clooney will have his revenge. Airborne herpes - you heard it here first.

Hohan goes to any lengths to have what Paris has, even herpes! It must be hip now to have sores. Ugh...

How is she hiding that 7' critter in those leggings she's so fond of wearing?

Having herpes is the new bedazzled cell phone in Hollywood.

Can someone please say firecrotch again.

Saucie;

she rolls it up in a hose caddy, and stuffs the whole thing in her cavernous vagina.

hehe, I said hose

Have you guys ever heard of putting a fruit roll-up on a dick and then getting it sucked off? They don't sell fruit roll-ups anymore and I'm wondering if there's a suitable replacement. They have this stuff called fruit leather, but that doesn't work, and wonton wrappers, beef jerky and seaweed for sushi rolls don't have the same effect.

Happy belated b-day Tranny G - missed it on Friday. I will offer up an honorary salud to you at beer:thirty today!

How does Lindsay get into all these clubs? Isn't she 19? Doubt she could get away with a fake ID. Curious

Whoa!! Who saw this coming?!?
I bet you this dude, between bangin Paris and Hohan, never hit the sides. Just a big ol' Batcave.

The super herpes will necessitate the creation of a super-herpes crime fighter, STD Man. He shall be born of an oozing blister and it will be 7-10 days before he is sufficiently scabbed and ready to fight. His innocuous day job will be nannying to the rich and famous. His only downfall, lap dances. His greatest nemesis? Paris Hilton, of course. She loves the lap and has a scorching case of the herp.

Osh, they have fruit-by-the-foot now. Only that just might be wishing.

Very good, Saucie, very good.

Lindzer is not just the finest Long Island or American ho.
She's not at the top of the international ho list.

Ho it up Linzer, ho it up.

Fire-pussy! Would you fuck her?! Fire-crotch! Slut! Poor broke-ass bitch lives in a hotel! It's disgusting! She's only worth, like $7 million, which is poor. Rosie O'Donnell should whip that bastard's ass.

Isn't this, in some way, like all of them are fighting over the same hobo's cigarette butt, but dirtier? It makes me want to recreate the shower scene from Ace Ventura when he discovers Einhorn's a man! Einhorn's a MAN!!

TrannyGranny - didn't know it was your b-day! Happy belated! Mine's tomorrow!! I love May babies! I want a lotion gift basket!

28 sauceie....milk just came out my nose!

Jacq...I would have fucked her during the "mean girls" phase, I don't care how old she was, that santa scene gives me wood. I would have liked to covered my self in whip cream and let all 4 girls crawl on me like puppies. Gemini's Rule! Happy b-day manana, if I don't have access to the computer.

osh, what about laffy-taffy? Froot by the Foot (tm) makes me feel self concious

Oh, thanks for all the b-day comments everyone, have a virtual sloppy kiss on me, MWAAAA!

I might be going home next week!

OK, getting a little afraid as I will be traveling to NY this week! At least now I know which clubs to stay away from lest I catch herpes, sit in a puddle of semen or, god forbid, catch a glimpse of Lindsay's cheeto-orange freckled pussy and 7 foot clit! Gag, and what a way to ruin a good buzz on $20 martinis.

just for the person
who said [something like]
someone say that word again...
...this is for you :)

firecrotch

anyone need it explained ?

oh and on another subject...

===

...this is so funny
from lohan's forum people

"Your posting permissions have been removed"

lol bitch :)

do you imagine that will stop us
telling what
is real?
no it
will
n
o
t
so
get
a grip
babe, time to rock and roll :)

lol bitch
so do you?
prefer
it
here:)

anyplace, anytime

just dont try to fuck with me

not a good move :)

This girl has so much sex, is anybody else starting to think that she may be a drag queen? Who else goes through men that fast? She's giving early 90's Madonna a run for her money.

She looks like she could use a hot cup of Italian Stallion, I'll even give her the Tea bag.....

Omg I cant believe it I always thought of here as a cute angle and she knows wat is she doin well maybe I am wrong and maybe she’s doin this coz she love attention and want to be famous and if wat is said about her is true I cant defend her
guess wat
shit happens

I never knew you could make that much money owning a Nacho company.

I didn't even sign on to comment on the story . ..

WHEN DID THEY STOP MAKING FRUIT ROLL-UPS?!?!?!

I am most upset.

But I do have a comment NOW.

Their couple name could be Nach-Ho.

nice to see mamacita back!

is a 7' clit anything at all like a dangling participle?
gawd, who would EVER want any of paris' sloppy seconds?
tell ya what, i'm NEVER staying at another hilton hotel! cruchy sheets!!!

ugh.

damn.
*crunchy*

osh:
You can do a couple of things:
One is to take jam (not jelly, the gelatin fucks it up) and cook it down to a reduction so that most of the liquid is gone and then smear it out over some A) wax paper B) parchment paper C) saran wrap, and let it A) cool off between two sheets B) cook in the oven between two sheets C) cool off on its own.
The two sheets are necessary for the thin, wrapable consistency. Make sure you press them hard together, like between two books, otherwise it gets lumpy.
You can also puree the shit out some fruit and then do the same thing, but you have to add some water and either sugar or honey. Honey is better.
If you cook it in the oven at a low heat for a long time, the wax paper thing is best.
No, I just cook a lot.
Anal, not oral...

#34 - From the mental hospital? You're not going to be leaving us forever, are you?

Jacq;

Sure as hell feels like a mental hospital. I'll still be around, just back to sitting in my underwear in beautiful CO. Hey, wanna go buy some jelly, oops, I meant jam and get weird? I might be able to snake a straight jacket, if you want to dress like a nurse....

Normally, I'd be like, this Lohan is such a whore. Which she is. But you just KNOW Paris will be ticked off to which I say, "Check mate!" because after that video of her and that greasy pig last week, she needs a slap in the face. How long will it take for Paris to shag ol' Valderrama (if she hasn't already)? This is better than One Tree Hill.

I'd be fun if the late Don Knotts was her wacky telescope weilding next door neighbor and would call her on the phone when she devours her prey within the folds of her 7" foot clit:

Don Knotts(in patented comedic voice):I've been looking at you thru my bedroom window *sniff* *sniff*

Lindsay: Is this DON KNOTTS!?!?!

Don Knotts: eeeeh oooh *click*

*props to Dana Gould

You'd think there were more men on the Hollywood seen than someone else's leftover. But then again, Hohan is a skank and seems to not have the ability to find a man on her own.

The plastic surgery/coke bills must be finally catching up to her.

Pretty soon she'll have to date Bill Gates.

Poor Hohan, can't you find someone other than Parasite's sloppy, open-sore having, pus-oozing seconds? I mean, that's not just the herpes you're courting, it's the SUPER-HERPES!!! Oh wait, she's probably already got it! Silly me, carry on Hohan, carry on....

*Stavros Nachos is an ugly, ugly man. Money cannot buy you everything, that's for sure.

I wonder how the fuck these supposed "greek industrialists" get any business done if they're spending all their time here picking up all these hookers.

Besides, Taquitos Nachos doesn't sound very greek to me, it sounds...I don't know,

Mexican.

oh saranwrappedasshole aka tsarinaamanda your really not one to point out who is ugly and who is not, when you have a mug that looks like this...

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/graphics/art3/0519063nc1.jpg

and here is saranwrappedasshole teaching us all a new trick..

http://www.filecabi.net/video/fatclapper.html

She's clapping because she just found out that the mashed potatoes at KFC now come in SUPER FAMILY size...the little things which make people happy are so endearing..

Wow, I sure hate to take a page from He Who Must Not Be Named, but it seems like I might have someone obsessing over me....! Looks like I have an enemy, how fun, but I'm kinda wondering what I did to warrant such a hate-filled post. I didn't kill your father and rape your mother, that was L. Ron Hubbard, not me, I swear. Oh, and sweetie, the whole "fat" thing has been done to death. It's so trite, come up with something original, please.

thats funny, it wasn't so "trite" when you used it yesterday in your post yesterday...

I guess it's all nice & dandy when you are dishing out the put downs and name calling...but when the tables are turned it's really not much fun anymore...

I'd think it's be more like one of those flailing water spray things than a slip and slide. Although, I guess if you started at the far end, got a running start, and your aim was true, you could get friction burn and an STD.

Funny how SHMNBN came to strafe people when nobody was here.

If you ignore it Tsarina, it will leave.

I'm not a goldigger. I just love cock.

What about Mary Kate?????

See, Lindsay and Paris became enemies when Paris stole Nachos from MK. Lindsay sided with MK and turned against Paris.

But now Lindsay is with Nachos.

So where does Mary Kate fit into all of this?? That's what I want to know!

Submitted by an annonymous waiter Tom Cruises dinner order:

One cock, hardened, with a side of balls on semen sauce.

Crap, Li-Lo's gonna get the crabs for sure. Doesn't she know that playing with Paris's sloppy seconds/messy thirds/AIDS encrusted fourths always leads to a check up at the free clinic and some tears of regret?

Stavros is damn lucky he's rich. If he was poor, he'd NEVER get a date! He makes me sad to be Greek; he's just about as fugly a goober as you can get.

@61-

I know, I know. But I always seem to get lured in by the troll. Damn their oily hide! Yeah, we sure haven't seen much of SHMNBN since we all started ignoring it....I hereby vow to ignore it, maybe it will go the way of Lame-ass.

They're rich and famous and yet they act like 12 year olds. i.e. "PAris said shit about me, boo hoo, I'm going to go fuck her ex boyfriend, that'll show her."

Man, I wonder how many people in that crowd have Herpes now?

67 - I think the real question is how many of them don't have Herpes now. Surely that list is much shorter to rattle off.

And, yeah, I agree. They remind me of the cattiest, lamest high school freshman ever. The average looking girls with lots of money and slutty ambitions who spend all their time airing their dirty laundry. Ironically, all those girls now wait on me at different restaurants in town. Hehe.

;D

freshmEn*

I is smart i swears it.

#68, LOL!!!!!!!!!!

You just reminded me that a friend just went back to his home town and had a very nice discussion with his high-school prom queen while she rang up his groceries.

same way obi wan does

"can i see your passes?"

[waves]

"you dont need to see their passes "

"I dont need to see your passes"
"move along now"

:) lol guys :)
and thanks

63 hopefully staynig
out of a
l
l this sh*t so she can reach her full potential
and not as part of a twin thing
sorry got that from hayley / linds

#68
maybe the real question is
how many of them dont have
12 year olds [hi boy]

...and what does
...that
tell
you about
s
o
c
i
e
t
y

Herbiefrog, a quick suggestion, if you want to be impressive by your depth, then try less hard to seem deep. It seems somehow self indulgent and I think that your point may be missed because people will be put off but what could be percieved as your trying too hard.

Oh, and the only person who loves cock more than Lohan? Yeah, The Cruise-meister.

Man, that Hilton/Niarchos/Lohan strain of herpes is gonna make Ebola Zaire look like a case of the sniffles. On the upside, no aliens will ever invade the planet now.

Heh - the next great celebreality show: "Six Degrees of Penetration".

Herbiefrog - are you twelve? Or just retarded?

L
a
t
e
r

L
o
s
e
r
.

I am so sick of this bitch... almost as much as PARIS damn Hilton!

oshkoshb-goshdammgosh:

Your comments are too entertaining. You should have your own website.

wow this is trash.