whoo!! First???????

Megan Harris is a dolt

Boy is he fuggers.

I fuckin' love The White Stripes, and his new band The Raconteurs. And that's all I have to say about that.

Wow, Michael Jackson has finally become white.

I didn't know they were making another Dawn of the Dead movie.

holy mother mary waaat

FIRST SHITHEADS

TCLTC, oh hi mom

http://www.evilscience.net/institutions/halloffame/edwardiso.jpg

TCLTC

Yuck!

I'm sure I read somewhere that his freak job of a wife has no eyebrows. I imagine this kid to look a little like Uncle Leo when the stove blew up in his face.

The Johnny Depp of rock, goes out of his way to appear weird, slovenly or unattractive. You should see the Mrs. The kid's gonna give Apple and Moses a run for the fugly money.

In other news, go to this link to read about what everybody's favorite limey junkie is up to:
http://www.thisislondon.com/showbiz/articles/22525591?source=Evening%20Standard&ct=5

I am more handsome than he is.
http://catholictvguy.blogspot.com/

There is definitely something Tim Burton-esque about him. I'd rather do Meg.

Okay, krisdylee, this one's for you.

Some folks have joked about what BigJim really looks like, so let's set the record straight. After seeing this butt fugly Jack White dude, plus Megan "Gollum" Harris and Edna "Tons of Fun" Bambrick, I thought you could use this: http://profiles.yahoo.com/therealbigjim68

Other ladies are welcome to view as well.

i think it is telling that an anagram of "Scarlett" is "Test Carl." Who is this carl? and why does he need testing? either that or this baby was supposed to be named carl.

I knew a guy named carl, but he spelled it with a K and lived next door for 3 years. True story.

Who's the guys standing in front of you with the hairy chest and white towel? He's hot.

When I first saw the page, I SERIOUSLY thought that was a picture of a dead person.

He looks less like a dad and more like a hairy Uncle Fester.

Something even stranger - Meg White (the ex wife) was the maid of honor at their wedding!

...and we thought Tom Cruise was strange...

fine,yeah, Tom Cruise still takes the cake. At least Michael Jackson and Jack White have some ounce of talent....

Not too shabby BigJim....

Jack is a scary looking dude, but he's a great musician. I think he purposely does the fugly thing to avoid the screaming girly groupies...

OMG, I sounded like sherry-co. Fuck me...

His Mona Lisa grin is intriguing.

BTW, nice towel BigJim.

A lot of chicks dig that guy. Over 80% of them are also active necrophiliacs.

For you, I might let the towel drop.

#11 don't mess with Chris Martin's kids! anything that is half Chris Martin is hot and cute

#15 I was thinking the EXACT same thing..we need to find this Carl! Carl!

TCLTC

still can't tell how big jim really is

but i'd hit it

#4, I agree with you. He's a talented musician, nothing like Pete Doherty. I don't understand why chicks would think he is attractive. He looks like he is morphing into Tiny Tim in that photo.

It's MeganHarris on a good day............

Here are some random thoughts after seeing that:

1) OMG, Michael Jackson (MJ) has been reincarnated as a Whitey
2) I'm tired of hearing about MJ and his kids, now he's had another one?
3) I'm tired of hearing about MJ. And little kids. Those battles are lost...and he has another one?
4) I thought MJ liked little boys. And now he has a wife and a kid?

Jack White > Stuttering John?

Big Jim all I see is a picture of a hairy pussy.......just kidding........I thought Canadians were black.......

Scarlett White. Clever. Someone come up with a cool name for their next kid that means black, (cause I'm not smart enough) and then their color family will be complete. And then they'll rule the WORLD!!!
(going back to my corner now)

# 31 I think they're trying to rule the world as well - a modern day 'Patridge Family' with ex-wives and color-coded kids.
The Seven Nations better keep an eye on these freaks or nothing is going to hold them back.

Jack's wife used to be my cleaning lady, and one day she called me at about 6:30 am.

"Papa, I can't work today."

Why not? The floors need a moppin'.

"I'm very sick."

You don't sound sick.

"Well, I just fucked Jack White from the White Stripes. Is that sick enough for you?"

Sorry I doubted you.

This guy is a walking advertisement for hazing at an early age. If he'd just gotten more wedgies at elementary school he'd be a better adjusted individual. Sadly, he slipped thru the cracks, like poor Tim Burton.

When will we learn, WHEN!!!!

Jack White is awesome and a genius. Can we please go back to picking on people that deserve it? Like Tom Cruise?

he's no george michael, that's for sure

YIKES, iS he alive??????

wow bigjim, but....but.....your CANADIAN!!!

There is a McDonalds ad at the top of my screen that says roll over for a taste.
Tee hee.

too bad, your married. maybe you should 'accidently-on-purpose' exclude that info :P

#35: PetiteGhost, with that name I assume you're related to Jack White?

#35
Are you serious? This guy creeps me dry.

It's Jack Black's evil twin Jack White, one does stupid funny movies and plays in a shit band and this one has a great band and play's in horror films................

Funny that the creepiest man alive names his daughter the most normally..In your face Gwyneth...Jack's original even when he's being generic!

# 11, haha funny comment abt Apple and Moses. Its fun to pick on babies isn't it?

I personally have never heard of Jack White..he looks ugly and freaky..you would think that the Superficial "gods" who do the postings could have come up with something better than this creepy assed person.

Saddest thing of all is this is Friday, and we probably will not get a new thread until Monday...ho hum...its gonna be a long weekend..

44, Apple and Moses aren't actually people, duh

Did Jack White die? Why didn't anybody tell me?

Jack "The Joker" Nicholson is having a bad day.

Someone should consult his stylist.

@31: Ebony, Onyx are two that come to mind.

This man scares the shit out of me. I can only imagine how hideously ugly this kid will be after looking at pics of that wife. Ugh. Somebody beat those two with the whole damn ugly TREE! Never been a fan of his music, either. He seems like the original emo guy. I prefer musicians that don't take themselves so damn seriously. On a positive note, at least he named his kid a fairly normal name.

Also, maybe he should actually go outside during the day. The sun is your friend. I'm just surprised he doesn't have rickets or something. He looks like a vampire. Yuck.

# 46 Ok, are you thick or are you thick? Please pick one.

That's gonna be one freaking ugly baby.

Who and who had what?

oh god, lambananas please leave. don't ruin my friday with your nonsense

Hey Everyone..Just released photo of LAMBANANAS...He/She is sooooooooo damn sexy!

COME SEE ALL:

http://www.derekhail.com/wp-content/uploads/2006/05/5-5-2006%20-%20unsexy%20header.jpg

@46 oh god did you just seriously post that......remember now activate your brain before you speak or post for this matter

TCLTC, seriously

Jack is one of the few artists saving rock and grass roots American music. Leave him be. Do I want to marry him? No. Would I love to rumble my face and play peekaboo with Meg White's breasts? Yes.

Okay, BigJim. Drop the towel and show us why they call you "big" Jim. Do it. Do it!

#4 and #57 are absolutely right. And call me crazy, or crazy drunk, but I'd hit that.

Just peekaboo? come on be a man say what you really want nancypants-yes this word my creation, and since you're questioning it makes you a bigger nancypants than before WOOT

TCLTC

@41 & 40

Nope, not related, I picked my name a few weeks ago, Little Ghost was taken, hence the Petite. Seriously, The White Stripes and The Raconteurs fucking rock. I can't believe anyone hasn't heard of The White Stripes but if you haven't, for Christ's sake get your little ass to a record store. Anyway, I'm not saying he's hot, he's conclusively weird, but whatever, weird is good.

PetiteGhost: "weird is good" is that what you keep saying to yourself? just wondering, it's an excellent credo to live by

I don't know if anyone has said this yet, (I realy don't want to read 62 posts), but he looks like Edward Scissorhands in that picture. And that's hot. (Just kidding..or am I?)

He looks like Janis Joplin. A vampire Janis Joplin.

Holy Crap, Big Jim....TAKE ME NOW!!

I'd hit that hard and sideways & twice on Sundays!

that's the only worthwhile view on the whole page...Jack White is, of course, hideous to look at, however he is a musical genius & his production work with Loretta Lynn was pretty awesome and I detest the country music genre on the whole....and speaking of holes...back to Big Jim....!!!
How DO you get your towels so white?!?!! : )

#49-Weezer was obviously the original emo (like, back in 1995), not the White Stripes. The White Stripes and the Raconteurs ROCK.

BigJim is a popular guy today. Just remember ladies and the few gentlemen who want him, I'll only let you have him if I get to jump right on in... I like it like that..... oh, and don't forget the whipped cream...

and chocolate syrup....

#14 Torso shot only I see.

You're really Tom Cruise with a chest wig arn't you BigJim.

Don't lie to me!

PS. Why oh why is there an anorexic woman taking a piss in the background...?

(Yes, I am aware that is a shower... Eh.. Probably)

@14 Tease, drop the towel. You can keep your face out of it.

Yeah, we're all a bunch of supermodels here...

Anyhow, that guy doesn't seem any more out of place then the rest of the emo-Goth community. They're all kind of freaky looking when exposed to natural sunlight.

31: Obsidian. Anyone named Obsidian White is pretty much going to spend his life being a rock-star/secret agent who shoots bad guys while doing their wives.

Well, I suppose it could also be a really kick ass heroin blend of Mexican Black Tar and China White.

This thread made me nauseous.
Like yay Jim N Kristee 4 ever y'all!!!

BigJim,
You are mistaken. I'm Gollum. No joke.

He's looks like he's scouting a modeling contract for 3M Liquid Paper.

And before any of you say it, yes, I DO have a big nose, and I'm fat (well, not really, but you call everyone fat)
xoxo

Posted by Iambananas on May 5, 2006 05:04 PM

Who and who had what?

___________________________________

How does that merit being called annoying or getting insulted? You are idiots, TOPAZ21 and Sweetsens8tion... seriously... grow up all of you haters... and BTW... Why are you haters obsessed with every word I type? Are you, like, weirdo stalkers?

This used to be a site where everyone posted comments on celebrities... that was fun, and that's how it started. I posted that I didn't hate Tom Cruise and I'm not a freak to wish someone dead that I don't even know. So, lets go back to just commenting on celebs and not on fellow posters behind the anonymity of a screen name. I don't understand saying something personal about a screen name... it's that dumbest thing in the whole world.

This used to be a site where everyone posted comments on celebrities... that was fun, and that's how it started. I posted that I didn't hate Tom Cruise and I'm not a freak to wish someone dead that I don't even know. So, lets go back to just commenting on celebs and not on fellow posters behind the anonymity of a screen name. I don't understand saying something personal about a screen name... it's that dumbest thing in the whole world.

Just released photo of Sweatsens8tion!!!!

http://www.uglypeople.com/uploaded/6/ugly203.jpg

See, it really dosen't make a logical person out of a dumb one, now does it?

Now you see what I'm tlaking about, so take my advice and really try to act like a member of soceity and not like a bratty little annoying thing.

This used to be a site where everyone posted comments on celebrities... that was fun, and that's how it started. I posted that I didn't hate Tom Cruise and I'm not a freak to wish someone dead that I don't even know.

So, lets go back to just commenting on celebs and not on fellow posters behind the anonymity of a screen name. I don't understand saying something personal about a screen name... it's that dumbest thing in the whole world.

Just released photo of Sweatsens8tion!!!!

http://www.uglypeople.com/uploaded/6/ugly203.jpg

See, it really doesnt make a logical person out of a dumb one, now does it?

Now you see what I'm talking about, so take my advice and really try to act like a member of society and not like a bratty little annoying thing.

And, P.S. My Screen name is I_AM_BANANAS... like the letter I (eye)... and it's not my fault you don't know the difference. Ever heard the Gwen song? I am bananas b-a-n-a-n-a-s!

Don't hate, appreciate.

You're fucking retarded, that's what your are, lamban whatever...

lambda lambda lambda;

dude sure it USED to be about celebs only. then it fucking blew up about 3 months ago. now, the internal gossip is usually more interesting than the actual blog. let go of the past.

BigJim: i'm intrigued that you chose this post to highlight yourself. if yr pic is true, kudos. im straight and i can admit that. then i thought, he's married and trying to cheat, he's an asshole. and then yr wife posted about whipped cream. so double fucking kudos you canuck.

where the fuck can i buy my TCLTC tshirts? i thought tshirthell.com would have em by now. the front side should only have the acronym.

blood paintings? it'd be cooler if he used period juice. that has evil "anti-cheating" properties according to some people south of the border. plus it's be cooler to see a pic of pete squeezing a tampon into a ziplock baggie.

jack white is neither emo nor goth. he's no claudio sanchez, but he still kicks ass. btw, i'm offering "how to drum like meg white in 5 easy minutes."
cheap.

er, and i forgot to add, anyone else think he bears a striking resemblance to the "an american haunting" roll over preview?

Weird...he looks a little like Sigourney Weaver...Ya think?

Who popped open Johnny Depps coffin?

In that picture he looks like he has a mouthful of vomit but he hopes no one has noticed yet. Lovely.

Not a bad musician but isnt he doing a song or something for coca-cola now? Bastard sellout.

lame-bananas- SHUT THE FUCK UP NEXT AND STOP TALKING TO YOURSELF. JESUS CHRIST.

He needs some VO5 hair treatment geez...otherwise, I love the White Stripes!

I'd hit Meg White, as long as she has been sanitized after being around this freak.

I think I'd fuck him. Ummm... yep, I'd fuck him... Freaky guys tug at my heartstrings...

Eeek, and here I thought wanting to bang Jim was bad enough, j/k Jimbo.

i got a dui :(

Evangelia, you should have called me, I would have given you a ride home.

Sorry to hear that Evangelia. Depending on what state you are in, it might not be that bad, though - esp. if it's only a first offense.

#78 hahaha weirdo stalkers..ya nevermind the guy in the bushes ok just keep on walking k

TCLTC

Two thirds of you idiots just post variations of what the article's jokes are. Get some wit you unoriginal fucktards.

"Ooh he's white" "pale" "corpse" "michael jackson" "ghost" Jesus fucking christ, you unclever lemmings are never going to get anywhere in life.

who is this creepy fuck anyways?

I never understood the whole, White Stripes are brother/sister, husband/wife, ex husband/ex wife, thing. I heard so many different stories that i didnt care anymore. Now i am intrigued once again. What was the deal with that?
http://celebrityreligion.typepad.com

@100.. Doode or madam, it's a friday night and we are posting on a fucking celebrity gossip board, welcome to Nowhere in Life International.

@66-

I mean the emo look. The music, I'm not too familiar with. I think i heard a few of their songs and I wasn't too impressed. Sounds like the Rolling Stones, if I remember correctly, and (I know, blasphemy!) I don't really like them all that much either. I'm totally bashing him on his looks.

The White Stripes suck.

ugh.....he looks like Edward Scissorhands. I hope the baby is cute. poor thing.

I was reading the An American Haunting Add just above this story (a little to the right), then I scrolled down a little, and that creepy white face showed up, and it really freaked me out. Then I saw who it was and I was REALLY scared. You can be a great muscician, but there's no excuse for looking like the living dead.

#96

Well, I guess you should've considered that before you did it. Did it cross your mind that not only were you endangering innocent people, but that it could possibly screw your life up royally if you got caught? You know what? If you make the decision to drive under the influence, you deserve what happens to you.

100. said:

"Two thirds of you idiots just post variations of what the article's jokes are. Get some wit you unoriginal fucktards."

Let me guess which third you belong to. I vote the unoriginal fucktard third.

Jack White will forever pwn. That is all.

thanks, gerald. next time i will definitely hit you up.
fa cube, i live in california...arguably the worst state to get a dui in. sucks, huh? anyway, just wanted to vent onthat.

#108...
who are you? if you're not god, i don't want to hear you judging me.

yeah back off #108 drinking and driving is soo cool

112, try telling that to the judge, that should be fun to watch.

@112:

No offense, but YOU brought it up, so maybe you should be prepared for some less than sympathetic comments.

To all my fans: yes, that is the real me. If I wanted to post someone fake, I would have picked a picture of a guy with six-pack abs. However, I often consume too many six packs and as a result am a little flabby around the middle (sigh).

Okay, my secret is out. I'm an alcoholic. Wait, no, I'm not an alcoholic, I'm a drunk. Alcoholics go to meetings.

To reply to some other posts: this pic was taken at a hotel, my towels are much less white. The person who thought I'm trying to cheat on my wife: what do you think my chances are of ever meeting ANYONE who posts here? Aside from the fact that they all live in different cities (and countries), I have no clue, nor any desire to find out, who they really are. If I wanted to cheat, I'd go to LavaLife or some other such site. I pointed out that I'm married for a reason.

Why did I post the pic? Four reasons:
1. Others were speculating incorrectly about what I look like.
2. To get some chicks on this site wet.
3. To make the fat loser guys on this site jealous.
4. Because I'm arrogant. I pump a lot of iron and think I look pretty damn good for 37, so there.

I'm done.

Yes, BigJim, you are one sexy beeyotch.
So can we hear about who that is in the background, and what the heck she's doing? Can't figure out if she's shaving, and if she is, why didn't she get the hell out of the way of your picture. No attention should be diverted from the manly work of art that is your torso. Woo Hoo!

Hey Big Jim I too agree, you are one sexy man. Love always reading your posts, along with most of everyone's posts here at SF, with the exception of IAMBANANAS he is nothing more than a stupid idiot, which he proves everytime he posts. SHERRY-CO-need I say more? and occasionally MEGAN HARRIS-again because she's an idiot.

hey BigJim....nice Bitch Tits..gyno boy! Damn I didnt know canadians could even grow chest hair! I think I just threw up in my mouth.

and the white stripes have ALWAYS sucked.

@94 krisdylee, you said it, don't don't why that is, but these weird guys kind of rock in a sexy way ;)
and 95, don't fret, I would take you to another world you poor deprived thang you. Maybe Kris too, but would have to confirm that with her.

Wait God frequents this site..ok run!

#118: Bigjim why do care what otehr ppl think? Most ppl here are losers..yeah I said it. dem thingz

TCLTC

Wierd people yes. good music. yes, too.

Not only does Jack White look like Johnny Depp, he looks exactly like Edward Scissorhands...

Evangelia: I'm an attorney in California. Not sure how you could do it, but if you can get in touch with me, I might be able to help.

I couldn't tell this was a girl or a boy until I googled Jack White. ... and I'm still not sure.

Evangelia: Depending upon where in California you are, I think there might be a way to talk without exposing either myself or my firm to the avalanche of shit that is sure to follow if I posted personal information here. I'm in Santa Monica. If you are in the LA area, we could pick a spot to meet. I'd be more than happy to talk with you, and if I can't help, I know some people who can.

BigJim: Hmmm. Could be an old picture. In the intel biz [or make reference to the movie], you need to establish "proof of life" to verfiy recent activity. So drop the towel and cover up with a daily newspaper or magazine.

I think George Clooney was on the cover of last month's Vanity Fair - that could work.

Just hope Edna doesn't try the same routine.

fa cube: you are so sweet. thanks a lot for offering. i wouldn't want to inconvinience you in any way, but my email is mikrievie@hotmail.com if you want to contact me.

Evangelia: E-mail on the way. :) Happy to help.

Since this site embraces all that is superficial, check out http://www.fluideffect.com and see how Hollywood makes beautiful people, well, beautiful.

Click on "portfolio" and the "before and after" pix - you'll never view the glossy magazines or tabloids the same.

Entertainment Whore: What? You mean Hollywood creates phony images of perfection? No! I won't believe it! I don't believe it! I can't believe it! I shan't believe it!

Heh, thanks Roger Rabbit!

I know, unbelievable! The Photoshop art work isn't what's shocking - it's the masterpieces they create.

I mean, really. They could make anyone look good. [insert sardonic comment here]

I still have her first appearance in Playboy. Sure, it's all crusted and kind of wrinkly now, and some of the pages don't come apart like they used to, but what memories. What...memories.

Bugger me, that post was supposed to be over on the Anna Nicole thread. Fucksakes! This is not the thread for cheap jerkoff jokes. Or....is it?

Ewwwwww.

first of all, greetings to all. I am new here.

Jack White is a genius, but like most geniuses, hes butt fuggin crazy.

anyone recall a about a year ago when Jack beat the crap out of some dude from the Von Bondies? Hes a loose cannon. And it figures Courtney Love had a crush on him. She stalked him there for a while, but he declined her affections. I, for one am very glad, bc can u imagine how twisted their love child would be? i think it would mean the apocalypse and the end of days. Surely, it would be some kind of demon. don't you agree?

Why has no one mentioned that BigJim doesn't show his face? Or his balls? Clearly he has something to hide...

#117:

It's actually a statue in the background. It was a "getway" weekend last summer in a Roman theme room. The statue is pouring water into the jacuzzi tub.

As for not showing my face, I don't want any of the weirdos on this site to know what I look like. As for not showing below the towel, I'm not a complete perv...

You're not missing much. I'm only a bit bigger than average down there.

WTF:

The fact that you looked proves that you're gay.

#140 a bit bigger then average?

according to The Alfred C. Kinsey Institute for Sex Research the average size is around 6 inches

*does the math

#140
Shweet.
Did that include being slathered in oil and scraped by wooden spatulas? 'Cuz that's my favorite part.

Is it Monday yet??

Guys, funny fuckin' story. Smoked way too much last night, and I fainted in the kitchen, cracking my head on the fridge door handle before crashing onto the floor. Scared the bejesus outta my hubby. Does this mean I have a problem?

i'm kind of surprised that he knew what sex was

144 I'll kiss it and make it all better.

Wow, krisdylee, sounds kind of like last weekend for me. we went to Vegas, and I got so drunk off of Jagermiester, then got sick, headed for the toilet, and promptly smacked the bridge of my nose into the porcelain. i broke capilliaries, that filled my pores with blood, that dried, that made weird "redheads", that were are bitch to get rid of.
Moral of the story: Don't do push-ups on the toidy.

Woo Hoo, 148th!