May 15, 2006
Charlie Sheen still not allowed to kill Denise Richards
Last Friday Charlie Sheen and Denise Richards agreed to extend the restraining order against Charlie to July 13 so a psychologist can evaluate and make a decision regarding the custody arrangement for their two children.
Although there's no reason a custody decision should take this long for these two. Here's the sequence of events that should occur, and it shouldn't take more than half an hour tops: the judge reads a list of the horrible things Sheen has done to Richards, watches Richards' threesome sex scene in Wild Things, takes off his pants, gives a standing ovation, and then awards Denise Richards the kids. Case closed.
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» Richie Sambora dumps Denise Richards


Comments
1. Posted by keronac on May 15, 2006 9:31 AM
first!
2. Posted by xAgonyxScenex on May 15, 2006 9:38 AM
the 3some scene in that movie blew ass
3. Posted by reptilicus on May 15, 2006 9:39 AM
Maybe he'll "juice" her.
4. Posted by Lou on May 15, 2006 9:40 AM
@3 lol. I think Richie already did.
5. Posted by trulymadlydeeplytori on May 15, 2006 9:45 AM
we waited 3 fuckin days for this?
6. Posted by SuperSpence on May 15, 2006 9:51 AM
You know what's really sad about this entire story? It's not the tragedy of the kids to be raised in a broken home. It's not the tragedy of divorce tearing apart two people. It's not even the tragedy of all those Hollywood hookers going without Sheen's custom while he tries to look good for the judge for the next few weeks.
The real tragedy is that, even after all this tawdriness has been dragged into the public, I still REALLY REALLY REALLY want to have sex with Denise Richards.
7. Posted by Amani on May 15, 2006 9:52 AM
Isn't Denise Richards one of the bad guys in "Wild Things"... Wasn't she evil and persuasive...
8. Posted by Spindoc on May 15, 2006 9:55 AM
For Denise's Birthday this year I'm going to get her one of those magnifying make-up mirrors...that way everymorning she can have a close up look at her youth escaping and deal with the realization that once her looks are gone she has nothing whatsoever to interst anybody. Oh, and I'll probably also get her some movie gift certificates...those are always nice.
9. Posted by Proteon on May 15, 2006 10:07 AM
These two are proof that civilization must fall.
10. Posted by Star Maker Machinery on May 15, 2006 10:17 AM
The Machine will win custody. He is a children's fashion designer and will kill anyone who fucks with him.
11. Posted by CheekyChops on May 15, 2006 10:19 AM
What is she complaining about? She knew he was into drugs, liquor and hookers before she married him. Hell.. the wife before her was one of those hookers. She jumped on the wrong train and is now blaming the driver. Dumb broad.
12. Posted by BarbadoSlim on May 15, 2006 10:20 AM
Charlie Sheen dresses hookers in cheerleading outfits.
As a male, I nominate Charlie Sheen as President of this Universe and all its alternate realities.
that is all.
13. Posted by PapaHotNuts on May 15, 2006 10:29 AM
Charlie Sheen is a ninja. No bullshit.
14. Posted by sharkbite on May 15, 2006 10:33 AM
Celebrities and the justice system... oh what a sight to be seen.
http://www.wehateeverybody.com
15. Posted by Jacq on May 15, 2006 10:51 AM
I like that they BOTH agree to extend the restraining order. Nothing says, "Yeah, bitch, I'd do it if I could." like concurring that you need to be kept apart by law.
16. Posted by tsarinaamanda on May 15, 2006 11:04 AM
Ugh. She pisses me off. Quit your whining, you annoying, has-been hag. We all know you married him to hitch your name to a bigger star, then you popped out 2 kids to guarantee a piece of his money for life, then you have the fucking nerve to bitch about him when you KNEW what he was. Fuck you, Denise Richards, you talentless, caterpillar eyebrowed bitch. Spiteful cunt. You give all women a bad name, I hope he does kill you, he'd be doing you a favor by ending it now, so you won't have to look in #8's birthday mirror and see your mediocre looks fading away. Hell, if a guy wants to fuck hookers, more power to him. You knew what you were getting, so STFU already and get back to boning another has-been that you had to steal from your best fucking friend, you pitiful twat.
17. Posted by UNWASHEDMASSES on May 15, 2006 11:53 AM
I was going to post something, but #16 stated everything I could possible come up with. She even took "spiteful cunt". With regards to my opinion on this matter, please see the aforementioned sweet #16.
18. Posted by Spindoc on May 15, 2006 12:03 PM
#16, my friend would like to pay you to write a letter to his ex-wife.
19. Posted by sweetcheeks on May 15, 2006 12:12 PM
You know, it's easy to hate Denise Richards, but let's not forget that Charlie Sheen called her a "nigger" and "dick face." That's right, a NIGGER. Check out the phone transcripts on the smoking gun.
http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/0424061sheen1.html
Racist bastard.
20. Posted by Jacq on May 15, 2006 12:17 PM
When you marry Charlie Sheen, don't be surprised when he ends up acting like Charlie Sheen. They should take a second honeymoon to Vietnam and he can pull some Platoon-type shit on her ass.
#19 - You are a dickfaced nigger.
21. Posted by sweetcheeks on May 15, 2006 12:24 PM
Did somebody just call me a "dickfaced nigger?!" It couldn't have been Jacq, because Jacq is DEAD TO ME.
It must have been Charlie Sheen.
22. Posted by Feed_Me_Chocolate on May 15, 2006 12:48 PM
"Caterpillar eyebrowed bitch"!
SOM! I've always hated her eyebrows, I've just never been able to come up with that combination of words!
23. Posted by Aimtrue on May 15, 2006 12:53 PM
I can't believe it- They look so happy in that picture.
Can you imagine her during their first time together (image fads- flash back scene)
CS: Go on suck it- I gave up my hhoker way of life.
DR: I'm not sure
CS: Look that is what wives do, you want to be my wife right.
DR: Yeah( so I get some PR on the wedding and some cash on check out) I guess it can't be that bad
CS: Of course not- go on
DR: ummmm ummmm gobble gobble (takes a break) not in my mout Charlie) ummmmm ummm gobble gobble
CS: Of course I respect you too much for that, I save that for the whores I mean saved- past tense- I don't do that anymore
Dr: and not in my hair never the hair
CS: I know the drill OKAY lets get this going
DR: UMMMM UMMMM gobble gobble
CS: christ watch the teeth
Dr: Sorry gobble gobble
CS: Look I gotta play golf-(and get someone who know what they are doing to finish this:
DR: Was it good?(with pathetic whinniy beg for approval
CS: Yeah Great, there is an envelople on the counter
DR: What?
CS: I mean culd you mail that letter for me- oh never mind
24. Posted by Sheva on May 15, 2006 12:56 PM
You know it's the love here that keeps bringing me back.
Thank you, all of you for your lovely words to the biyatch.
Now Charlie's first wife was a hooker? She was hot.
25. Posted by Spindoc on May 15, 2006 1:23 PM
Hmm, How racist is it actually to call somebody a pejurative that is not descriptive of their actual race. I.E., if you were to call the Olsen Twins Gooks, or Paris Hilton a Spic, I'm not really sure it has the same effect.
And Technically, after What Charlie probably made Denise do on their honeymoon the term Dickface is probably right on the money.
26. Posted by shankyouverymuch on May 15, 2006 1:29 PM
#19
After reading the transcript, I personally thought the NIGGER line was the funniest thing it... I don't know, but the word NIGGER is just really funny sounding... now, I know it's naughty to say and all that, but the word itself sounds funny to the ear... say it out loud a few times, fast then slow, and just listen to the way it sounds...
N-I-G-G-E-R very funny... Charlie might be on to something... I'm laughing over
here-a...
27. Posted by shankyouverymuch on May 15, 2006 1:31 PM
#25
Spindoc... dude you are on fire today... I'm laughin'... you're killing me...
28. Posted by iambananas on May 15, 2006 3:33 PM
I don't know who to believe! I think I believe Denise. Hav you seen 2 and a half men lately? It's stupid! That fake laugh track and making fun of the fat kid are getting old!
**IN CASE YOU WERE WONDERING, IT'S WEIRD, BUT SUPERFICIAL, LIKE, SUSPENDED MY ACCOUNT AND I HAD TO MAKE A NEW ONE! AT LEASE I GOT THE SAME ID, THOUGH... BUT THIS TIME I MADE SURE THAT THE i WAS OBVIOUS TO PEOPLE WHO CAN'T READ LETTERS.
29. Posted by PapaHotNuts on May 15, 2006 3:56 PM
Do not respond to it.
30. Posted by Gerald Tarrant on May 15, 2006 5:00 PM
The pic that is posted for this story tells everything.
Denise: I love Charlie.
Charlie: I love that hooker over there.
31. Posted by Amani on May 15, 2006 5:04 PM
#29, there are things in life, that do not deserve happiness...
#25, Come on! it was the friggin' N-Word, for crying out loud. It's special.
32. Posted by Spindoc on May 15, 2006 5:44 PM
#31, Saying that that particular word is any worse than any of the words used to insult any other race is in itself racist. You are saying, "Sorry Mexicans, even though the word spic is very insulting you YOU, it isn't as insulting as this other word is to this group" Thats almost as ridiculous as the fact that Denise Richards calling to ask PapHotNuts if she left her panties over at his place...of course the answer is Yes! (Grin)
33. Posted by Ringo5150 on May 15, 2006 6:14 PM
Women marry men hoping that they will change
Men marry women hoping they wont change
34. Posted by MeganHarris on May 15, 2006 8:33 PM
I must be the ONLY PERSON in the world who hasn't seen Wild Things. Any good?
35. Posted by Fa Cube Itches on May 15, 2006 9:12 PM
34 - Depends on how much you like crappy movies with Kevin Bacon's dick in them.
36. Posted by ning_ning on May 15, 2006 10:40 PM
If he really wants to kill her set a mouse trap
37. Posted by HughJorganthethird on May 16, 2006 12:07 AM
I heard when Denise was sleeping Charlie came home cracked and gave her a Cleveland Steamer.