May 15 2006Britney Spears coming to her senses

bspears-no-kabbalah.jpg

Britney Spears says she's given up Kabbalah and replaced it with her son. Last Friday she made a posting on her official site saying: "I no longer study Kaballah [sic], my baby is my religion."

She probably wasn't too into it in the first place considering she can't even spell it right. Plus after seeing the way her life is turning out what else is she supposed to assume except that Kabbalah has failed her.

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CRAZY WOMAN!

"I religiously ignore him and give the job of raising him and caring for him over to a stranger, so that he can he dropped on his head."

Hey hey....third

Kids cute....even if he has got a dented head

funny, i thought kabbalah was some kind of religious diet. she replaced it with her son... the way she looks, i wouldn't put it past her to eat her child right now

Fuck the bracelet! She ought to tie a little red string on her finger to remember to feed, bathe and change him. My baby is my religion?! She's goin' to hell at this rate. I'm more into cock worship, like Tom.
Geez, at least idolize a good lookin' youngn'. Boy, will that second kid ever feel left out. "You ain't mine! Youz yo' daddy's baby! Ain't my fault he don't worship you!"

check this out:
http://celebrityreligion.typepad.com/celebrity_religion/2006/05/britney_drops_k.html


Kabbalah said, "Don't let the door hit your big ass on the way out."

Have you seen this? I thought it was pretty funny. K-fed's new song. lol.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XGTl6tgVEFw

Brittnie iz smarrt

Call me crazy but I'd still bang her.

The huge cans, the face still looks cute, the overly blonde hair...you know she's probably a demented hillbilly in bed too.

She looks like Courtney Love in that photo. Minus the heroin.

what an idiot!!! You know, Brit, there are mothers who go Church every Sunday, work, and even have a social life and their children have not been dropped on their heads. I can't understand a mother who choose kids over work and friends, but not over an activity that asks no much of activity at all... So, no more Kabalah, then? Where you been studing while your baby was been watched by an stranger so why is that he had his accident? or were you eating your freaking cheetos? It looks like you choose to leave your pseudo religion rather than left your cheetos.
Stupid celebrities... No wait... Stupid Britney!

Damn pop stars...at least Britney is coming to her senses, It looks like Christina A. is losing hers, now she is Marilyn Monroe here.
http://starked.com/archives/she-really-isdirrrty/

For a second there, with Brit looking sort of good and SP ALMOST smiling, I felt a sense of hope for her. I thought "She can make a comeback!" and that SP might turn out to be a normal child and not suffer any real consequences of living with Brit and Kev.

Oh, sure, it was just a fleeting sense of hope. And it lasted but a moment ... but then I woke up and realized once again that she's Brit Brit, with Bit Bit and Bit Bit 2 on the way, unable to think, unable to reason, unable to see beyond some strong sexual desire for K-Fed, Cheetos, and Newports, and then there's K-Fed, wearing soiled wifebeaters with his underwear hanging out and his loser Playing with Fire! album on the way and him sticking out his tongue most of the time so we'll think he's sexy and cool. We don't.

What could I have been thinking? Brit ... SP ... hope ... no way. No possible way.

Poor Britney! She has gone completely crazy, can't even dress herself, feed herself, or bathe herself, much less look after her 2 children and loser husband, and now Madonna probably wont be her friend any more.

Alright, everything is falling into place...

Sign #1: A song with the words "Hit Me Baby One More Time" becomes a hit among America and launches Britney Spears' career.

Sign #2: Oops she did it again... came out with another talentless single that, somehow, hit it big... somehow, again.

Sign #4: Me Against the Music. Music is something so universal and known all over the world. Therefore, translates into "Me Against the World." I think I'm onto something...

Sign #5: Britney becomes a mother. How could anyone let her get away with such a thing?

Sign #6: Oops she did it again... Britney is pregnant once again.

Sign #7: Britney Spears announces that her baby is her religion.

Britney is a Slave 4 Sean Preston and Sean Preston is Toxic and will soon be found to be the anti-christ, and, along with his mother, "not that innocent." All their fans will be followers. No word on whether or not Madonna will be involved, but for now she's got her bracelet on... Kaballah is looking pretty good right about now.

So now it's "Us Against the Feds"... which I'm not sure if that means the FBI is going to be on their side, or that I'm really bored.

In either case, beware 2035 for his day may be coming!

Her baby is her religion? What does she do, worship at the altar of dirty diapers? Does she wear a gold-plated pacifier around her neck? Does she bask in the glory of every burp, hiccup or fart that weasles its way out of her ever-unsmiling tot? Maybe that's why she let the kid drive, I mean if the kid is her god he can handle an automatic transmission, right?

That baby is gonna be as gay as his father, the way he's looking at the end of that umbrella might be the first sign to getting some Johnny Cakes and then wrecking your car.......

Is that baby albino?

Hey guys. Miss me?

If it is of any importance, my post randomly landed on my favorite number (there were 9 posts before mine was submitted) Could it once again be a sign? Or am I bored? I don't know. And also, as #15 mentioned, Sean Preston never smiles. DEMON CHILD!

#17 - I was missing # 3. I think someone put White-Out on my monitor.

Nope, MeganHarris, no one even knew you were gone. Do you feel the love now???

Or it's the sign of the Apocalypse

If a religion celebrating an ugly baby is the next Hollywood trend... count me out!

Either Or

Oh, you're right #3 isn't there. Well move #4-#7 up... and the new #7 is: LOOK AT HIS F@*&ING FACE!

k. I'll sleep a lil better now

I never....EVER thought I would say this, but.....I think Brit looks cute, and her baby's cute, too.

[*drops dead*]

What the fuck is wrong with that baby? He looks completely zonked in every single pic. Are the doctors sure there was no brain damage, or is this genetics at work?

#20:

No.

Hmmm... Let me see if I have this straight. Britney is giving up on a "religion" that is almost as fucked up as scientology (don't believe me? Spend some time at www.kabbalah.com. It's as fruity as scientology, but less menacing.), so she can worship at the alter of K-Fed's genetic material.

Now I'm not saying that poor little whatever the fuck the kid's name is is retarded. Maybe he's "speshul" and maybe he ain't, but what can't be overlooked is that with these two as his parents, there has definitely been a lot of peeing in the gene pool.

The little brat is for sure going to be taking the remedial reading classes in school, and probably have to wear strings on his mittens well into the eighth grade so he doesn't lose them. Is this something worthy of worship?

Well, I guess it still beats ka-blah-blah.

Now I've done it. We're gonna get a sherry-cunt clone on this site extolling the virtues of yet another fucked up cult because I pointed out how lame it is.

In conclusion, TCLT<=====3

When I first glanced at that picture, before I read the title, I thought that was Pamela Anderson. Brit-brit needs to lay off the tanning beds.

Brit, we're all going to remember you said this when the "baby" is 16 and acting like Bree's son Andrew on 'Desparate Housewives.' Wheee!

I actually went to her website, and that isn't on there anymore. But there IS an interesting little letter from her called "False Tabloids" where she bitches about Star, In Touch, and some other tabloids and how their reporters need to face their own problems in their lives, such as being 50lbs overweight, and having cheating husbands/boyfriends. Yeah bitch, why don't you look at your own life before you try to pass judgement on others. It was almost prophetic, and pretty damn funny. She's a fucking has-been with no talent. The only thing she had was her body, and now that's shot all to hell. She really fucked herself over, the dumb cunt. I can't think of a more deserving bitch. Except Paris Hilton, of course.

The baby is soooo cute! too bad his dad is a total loser.

One of the most adorable little tots on the planet and all I can feel for him is sorry, sorry, sorry. Crawl away as fast as your chubby little marshmallow legs will take you, Sean!!

MeganHarris' face is soooo nasty! too bad she can't get a new one.

#36: the post is still there. And to correct thesuperficial, she did spell Kabbalah right. Doesn't change the fact that its one really messed up religion...

yea its better than being jewish though. no one like jewish people. but everyone hates jewish people with huge snouts- which is like all of them

Ha. ha. Stallion, your jokes are lame-o.

eden, not you again, you nazi-lovin' fuckwad.

Go stick your head in a microwave oven. Here is the trick: you have to jam something like a fork in the hole where the "door closed" sensor is in order for it to turn on. With that accomplished, make sure you set it on high power for at least ten minutes. We'd all hate it if all you did was cook your already damaged brain bad enough to be a drain on the healthcare system but didn't actually die.

Once the nuker is successfully running with the door open, shove your head in. Just so you know, it's gonna smart a little, but you can take it. Don't be a wimp, keep your head in there for the full ten minutes, or eternity, whichever comes last.

Wow, guys, it's so exciting when celebrities change their minds!

Britney is also expected to release a statement denouncing her belief in Santa Clause.

And in related "news", Tom Cruise is questioning his faith in the cock. Yup, you heard it here first.

Wait...I'm just getting word...sources say he took one look at Katie naked and has tearfully reaffirmed his LFTC.

All is well in Hollywood.

this is how she treats her religion if the pics are to be believed
http://www.idontlikeyouinthatway.com/index.html

@42 I wasn't kidding, we did see your picture, remember? I try my best not to, it makes me want to catch a ride with one of those suicide bombers............

I HAVE A PROBLEM WITH THIS... A BANY ISN'T A RELIGION! Does this mean she dosen't believe in God anymore? That is not good!

Now, she just needs to ditch the trailer trash baggage, and she'll be onto a real start!

http://www.wehateeverybody.com

Wow, her fans probably check out her web-site religiously, and the best she can do for them is a one-sentence denouncement of Kabbalah? Hmmm...wonder if the folks at Kabbalah headquarters are giving eachother high-fives? "Good riddance, LOOOOSSSERRRR!!!!"

her baby is her religion, wtf??
http://celebreligion.com

Britney Spears is the shit.

51 - I agree with 80% of your post. Lose the "the" and it would be perfect.


Ahh good old dipshit Britney. Your baby is your religion now? Just when I thought that kid's life couldn't get any more fucked. Assuming he makes it to grade school, I think the messiah will be getting his ass kicked fairly regularly.

^ minus "the".

"I no longer study Kaballah [sic], my baby is my religion."


Hmm. Study. Therein lies the source of Britney's failure to stay with her religion. When was the last time this numbcunt studied anything other than Chester Cheetah's Magic Word Find?

Although the idea of a rabbi strangling her while saying "I find your lack of faith disturbing" is really funny.

hey megan...you're sooo hot...i love the pix of you accepting the spelling bee award...are you into anal????

Give Fatney a break she thought Kabalah was that tasty greek food you eat off a stick.

Oops, she did it again...
She played with his cock,
Got lost in the the shame,

Ooh- she thinks she's in love,
Poked holes in K's glo-o-o-ove,
He rubbed her clit-or-is.

Oh, wait...I have another one! Wanna here it, here it goes...

Oops, Sean fell on his head,
But no, he's not dead,
Just re-ee-tar-ded,

(Oh baby, baby)
Ooh - you think she's a slut,
Just look at her gu-u-u-ut,
She's knocked - up - once again.

*The little fuck is kinda cute, though, I'll give her that.*

55 She is into Anal. She is well aware that she can get the sex as long as no one has to look at her face.

So, if her baby is her religion, will she then have two religions once the other half-breed is born?

Oh, I bet Eden is happy now that the Gentiles have Britney back...although, I'd say that the Jews won in this case, considering how trashy Britney is....Oh, by the way, Eden, you are a fucking cuntrag.

Britney, you may be fucktarded but you still managed to turn out one cute kid. Too bad he's pretty much screwed...with old K-Spend around he'll just have 2 dumb parents and no $$$

She looks like Ashlee Simpson.
Of course Sean Preston has a dented head, he's K-Fed's baby too remember.

OH well, easy come easy go.

OK, so where's Duckboy? I can't believe all this badmouthing Britney and the guy doesn't show up to defend her honor like Zorro.

Hey eden, if you hate Jews so much, I'd love to send you a one-way ticket to Iraq. Last time I checked, everything but Islam was outlawed. I'm sure you feel right at home. Make sure you go outside without you head covered. The men love that. Maybe you can take a suicide boming class. Bitch.

Wow...I can't believe Madonna kicked her out of her club.

#39 Whoa Italian gelding, I am Megan's new face and spokesmodel. I will be handling all new comments regarding Megan Harris, thank you.

Fake boobs, fake hair, fake tan...fake baby? Is there anything about her that is real?

FEDEROLOGY - the new religion sweeping Hollywood. If you want to be an ignorant hillbilly cunt that loves Cheetos, sign up now!!!
All it costs is about $150 million to support a worthless, ugly fuck of a husband, your career and your once-hot body. Oh, and your soul will be eternally damned, almost forgot that one. FEDEROLOGY, catch it now!

maybe brit's babe is really damien, born to promote The Omen 3 which drops 6/6/06 y'all!

When she was handed the baby she asked, How do I know it's really mine?

Fucktard

And she's using the same skin colorist as Jessica.
Capture her and Jess, boil em down, TADA, Marmalade.

Because worshipping your child is much more intelligent.

that headband would almost look Chanel-esque if she blunt cut her bangs. short.and i have to say, that's the first picture i've seen where you son actually looks cute, so maybe praying at the temple of sean preston is working for her.

in fact, i want to run and get my Gingher embroidery scissors right now and snip snip snip. there's potential, i KNOW it.

Oops, she did it again...


http://news.aol.com/entertainment/music/articles/_a/another-parental-faux-pas-for-britney/20060516093809990001

maybe SP is really xenu.

oh, no, what, that would be brooke's kid, wouldn't it?

WTF happened to this site? i go away for a few days and there's more trolls than a fairy tale!

Actually, I think her saying that her baby is her religion is about the most intelligent thing she's ever said. A very philosophical comment that. Let's hope she practices this religioin a little better than she practiced Kabbalah....although I doubt it if what's happened with that pickled punk so far is any indication.

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