May 31 2006Anna Nicole Smith still might be pregnant

i didn't know she was dating anyone.

Hmm, it IS fun to be first!

Duffman says "Now thats a mug, you don't want to chug"..........

Why in the hell to all of these celebs try to keep up the "I'll never tell" front when the go to Petit Tresor?! Someone there tells the press everything! I thought that famous people already paid people to to that - they're called publicists.
Who did that last quote come from?
"But Birkhead has denied he's the father of the denied baby. So, unless those denials are denied, nobody should have a problem."
Her "attorney?"

what's up with the fucking horse-teeth??

I read in "In Touch" that she's planning on naming the baby "Cherri Pie" if it's a girl. REALLY.

Apparently, she's gunning a life of adult film for her daughter. I guess "Hornie Sexpot" and "I Have No Self-Esteem" were already taken.

Ms. Smith was quoted saying:

heeeeeeeeeee...shhhhhhhh is gonna come out of my vajayna..hihihihihihihi...

"I was born wif big gums, suh."

Man; I SO don't give a f-ck about Anna Nicole Smith. Unless she gives birth to K-Fag's or Teeny-Tiny Tommy Mapother's spawn -- that would be interesting.

#5
Yeah, not a very good tooth to gum ratio.

Uh oh, Britney Spears may soon be displaced as worst mother in the universe.

http://www.wehateeverybody.com

Mother and child should both be rendered down and then turned into machine processed meat blobs to add to government-subsidy noodle cups for prison lunches.

If memory serves from the days of the Anna Nicole Smith show (yes I was a dork and watched the show when it was on) doesn't Anna Nicole already have a son? A really ugly one?

Yeah, she does have a son. He should be around 20 by now. Poor kid--imagine having to admit Anna Nicole is your mother. Looks like he's not gonna be the only member of that club now.

She looks like Barbaro in that pic.

BTW, Superfi, I think I read quite a while ago that she DIDN't technically hump the rich old dead guy. She gave him blow jobs in his wheelchair because he was one-foot-in-the-grave and couldn't participate in any other sexual activity, and she 'loved' him. And she would feel just the same about an eleventy-billion-year-old half-dead retired plumber who WASN'T a multimillionaire because love is love, baby. Really.

She's had major amounts of cosmetic surgery done. Anyone else notice that she's like this oozy weird zombie that just strikes random bizarre sexy poses for no good reason? It's like she's been programmed by aliens to wander around as a cliche sex kitten and not make any sense.

Nothing sexier than gulping rancid 1940's vintage spooge.

Well, she could be pregnant, or she could just be morphing into Free Willy again.

It would be really funny if she gave birth to a huge spiral-sliced ham.

#17 You're right. I thought, however, that one day the Office of the People Who Run Everything got on the phone with the Illuminati, who in turn called the Zionist Occupying Government, and they all decided that since they didn't need to kill the third Kennedy brother anymore, they'd make Anna Nicole Smith. To tie up the American judicial system and pave the way for the first of three great race wars.

They actually used the body of a hooker they murdered with Chlorox-infused Inglenook, and programmed it with the cpu from an old Tandy computer. All of which would explain her appearance/behavior.

Even Stallion wouldn't fuck that horse/mare.......

i might have blown the old coot for 11 billion...

what's the joke: i'd keep 10 billion and spend 1 billion on mouthwash!!!

i wonder if trim spa sponsers abortions... nothing slims you down like sucking a dead baby out.

I can't believe she even has any eggs left to get pregnant.

I would have thought she ate them all.

As if she'd carry it to full term anyway!

"Raise your hand...if you're Sure!"

Sweetcheeks, you are on fi-ya, sista!

She's having the Trim Spa Baby! And I thought it was a tag line. I should have known she wasn't that smart.

anna to son: baby, come here and help momma fish your little sister out the toilet. then bring momma her medicine, the pink pills on top the fridge...

She already has a (surprisingly normal) kid.

So she *looks* very pregnant. By that criterion her ass is pregnant too. And her thighs. Come to think of it, she's been pregnant for years - I wonder what the gestation period is for, well, whatever she is.

Can I eat the placenta??

16
Because there's nothing more delightful than putting flaccid, liver-spotted penis that smells of urine and body funk into your mouth.

i wonder if she had to take out the cathider(sp) before she blew him...

If you want to see a really funny spoof of Anna, go to http://www.youtube.com and under "search" key in "MadTV Anna Nicole"

NOW, can I eat the placenta???

@32...

you can wash your hair in it...

32

No, Tom Cruise is already on the list.

Speaking of Tom Cruise...

Rumor has it that he abides much love and affection for penises.

TCLT <======3

How could there be enough drugs and alcohol on this planet to induce a male human to get an erect penis near, let alone inside this bloated, drunk, babytalking, drooling, petri dish with legs?

Oops, sorry I forgot, SHE'S RICH, bwaaahaaaaa...well, for a couple billion, I'd beat the crap out of Tom to get at that placenta...he doesn't need the money anyway...asshole...

I've never seen a more blank pair of eyes.

if you put your ear to her ear you can hear the ocean...

She probably isn't pregnant, during her last implant surgery the doctor probably just dropped one of the extra breat implants into her stomach.

#39 Maybe he gets off on danger, and god knows there's nothing more dangerous than her crotch-rot... brain-rot...

If she IS pregnant then my vote for baby name goes to either:

"Siniconia Vicodan Smith" or
"Your mom is a fat drugged up whore Smith" if it's a boy.

She probably hasn't confirmed her pregnancy yet because she's still trying to decipher the little plus and minus symbols on the pregnancy test.

#45 Actually, she was having problems because she stuck it in her mouth and was waiting for it to beep.

#34 Thanks for the visual.......*vomits

If she was pregs... then why would she try to conceal her stomach? Like the news on Anna Smith's pregnancy would send te world into a tail spin. Why does she want no one to know? Because she's SOOO important? Get real.

I found her actual name list:

Cherry Pie
Pizza Dough
Fe Male
Olive Loaf
Hello Dolly
Barbie
Ken
Bobby Trendy

Oh, I almost forgot

Colonel Sanders
Burrito Supreme and
Chimi Changa

Saucie, you forgot Little Debbie and Baby Ruth.

And...

Twinkie
Frito Lay
Slim Jim
Spaghetti O

How about

Chalupa
Enchirito
Lil' Smoky
Almond Joy
Chester Cheetah
Head Cheese
Teddy Graham

Maybe she is just constipated and she only THINKS she's pregnant - maybe she could push out a big, brown turd and tape the event for her show and make a big dumb deal about her thinking it was going to be a baby - maybe Jessica Simpson could fill in as the midwife - I heard she has a lot of free time lately...

Big Mac
Whopper Jr.
Weight Watcher
Keebler Elf

Aha, then she could name it BOB! Get it, BOB??? bwahhaaa

Who knocked her up?

"You're doing a terrific job, Brownie."

Sniff?? What the fuck is that smell? Oh, it's just "Bob" -

PUNCH THAT BITCH IN THE TAINT!

"Yo, hey Bob!!" Ya mudder's a whore..."

"Yo Bob, ya piece o' shit!"

Myrtle Beach? She's losing hick cred. She should go to Panama City Beach, aka The Redneck Riviera.

#61 - Ya mudder's a whore! Seriously, when is that NOT a good comeback? That right - NEVER!

Famous Amos
Chips Ahoy
Otis Spunkmeyer
Cool Ranch
Jello Pudding
Rice Crispy
Silly Putty
Bambi
Candi (or anything ending in "i")
Number Two
Ultimate Bacon Cheeseburger
Xanex
Vicodin
Stupid Baby

This person is all gums... I can't stand it. Kind of creepy....

also...

dinty moore
oscar mayer
mr. peanut
melba toast
chicken teriyaki
general mills
chef boy-ar-dee
ramen noodle

she's got the teeth of mr.ed...

"awww commme onnn willllburrrr..."

#31 I think you may be right... What is she anyway? The thigh crack tickled every noodle in my head... fucking hysterical comment, thanks!

#64...
number two
stupid baby
...that fucking rocks...i'm crying...

When she had all her lipo and breast augmentations she should have had a freaking gumectomy. Dumb bloated bitch.

Charlie Tuna

Crackrock Slimjim if it's a boy.
Heroin Moonpie if it's a girl. (Personally, I'm pulling for Extasy Chocodile, but that's a long shot.)

Slim chance of survival either way. Well, unless her older son takes care of it. He seems relatively squared away, all things considered.

Actually, Extasy Chocodile may have better odds than I first thought. It's a solid stripper name, and if the whelp is a girl, there is a brass pole in her future. Probably in Tijuana.

if i were a lesbian i'd do her.

then again, if i was a goat i'd do a goat too.

brandi, you're on fire...

between this and the kirsten dumb post, you're blazin girl!!!

No to be outdone by Brangelina, she could travel to the Congo and give birth in a destitute village in a hut surrounded by hot, naked tribesmen while she gives out free samples of Trimspa to the village women while she has sex with the men, who probably have never seen such a fat, whiny, bloated, toxified creature that hasn't emerged from the local swamp...all of this she could film for her show -

My horse makes that face after it eats a bag of cookies then makes itself puke.

#77

that also belongs on the nicole ritchie thread...

Gordon Fisherman
Pilsbury Dough Boy (for either boy or girl)
Hamburger Helper
Kool-Aid Man
Baby Back, Baby Back, Bacy Back Ribs
Willy Wonka
Bird's Eye
Campbell's Select
Jiffy Pop
Lick-m-ade
Dreamsicle
Squeeze Pop
Flavor Ice
AFLAC!!

#74 - Do you ever do it doggy-style? Hehehe

It will be hilarious if she gets her money from dead guy and then has to give some to this dude for getting her pregnant.....Kind of makes me want to sing some MJ......

"Anna are you ok, you ok, you ok Anna?"
"Anna are you ok, you ok, you ok Anna?"
"Anna are you ok, your pregnant, but your ok Anna"
"You've been struck by, you've been fucked by, a smooth criminal"

I forgot:
Burger King
and while I'm at it... Double Whopper
In keeping with the French theme of the day:
Royale Wit' Cheese

OH GOD.

Who impregnated that? Who looked at her coked-out, trashy, drunk ass and thought, "I know where I wanna stick it,"

She looks like a Naked Mole Rat wearing a blond wig! And she has the intelligence of my right shoe. After a night of hard partying with the skanky high heels down the street.

Anna Nicole needs a new kid. Her son is 20 this year and kids around that age tend to move out. So she needs a new one to take care of her. Considering the fact that she probably has a negative IQ, I'm guessing her son has ran the household since he was 3 or 4 – making sure mommy doesn't drink from the toilet bowl, accidentally electrocute herself and so forth. According to IMDB the kid is a "straight 'A' student" and Anna Nicole "credits him with helping save her life when she became addicted to prescription drugs." Don't know how she ever managed to give birth to a normal, smart kid, but I'm pretty sure she would be dead without him.

The same, incidentally, goes for Courtney Love and Francis Bean. She seems like a pretty normal kid and probably saves her mom's life on regular basis.

82 - I did it. Which is weird because I'm a female and not an acquaintance of David Crosby.

83

Francis Bean looks spookily just like Curt. Let's hope that Courtney doesn't get confused in one of her coke binges and kill her too.

....That mouth...it's like she is toothless on top...but the huge bottom teeth moe then compensate.....Toothless Baaabeee.....

#82...

I think someone probably was giving it to her "in the back door" and it "slipped". Maybe her scumbag attorney - he does't look like he does much - does this mean she is going to sue the turkey baster for alimony??

I doubt this is her doing, but it seems I read somewhere that her son (named something normal, if I recall) was very level-headed, made good grades in school, etc. Maybe her next one will turn out okay,too. After all I was practically raised by wolves (wolves would've been better) and I'm ok.

As for being a golddigger, that old dirty lech she married got exactly what he paid for. She might be a golddigger, but she earned her money. Can you imagine having to sleep with that wizened old troll? GROSS.

Every time I see a pic of her, her gums get bigger and bigger. It's like her teeth are sinking. Soon, her gums are gonna be so large, they'll try and take over the world. RUN! IT'S ANNA'S GIANT GUMS! But then...*gasp* what's this? It's..it's..it's a GIANT CLITORIS (attached to lindsay hohan!)!! OMG the clitoris and gums are battling! As the battle goes on and we nervously await the outcome, we are shocked as a new mutant joins the battle. A giant alien thing in a purple one-piece, oozing crabs and slime! But what's this? Before the purple mutant alien gets a chance to let out a herpes yell, a giant blob of blubber named Kirstie comes rolling into view. Not far behind, we see an ugly little man persuing her, screaming "Leeeeet me draw soommmmee blooodddd!! I wan to maaakkeee a peeeeccturee!"

Um...yeah. Sorry folks, I didn't get much sleep last night.

For the baby's sake, I hope it gags on Anna's Trimspa filled placenta.

#88
I think that idiocy skips a generation....hence her first born is all cool and normal and in spite of the Trimspa chemicals the is spawn is absorbing will be normal and extremely toned....the only fetus with a six pack....but the gums....well we can only hope and pray...well in the case of the threads in this room...PREY....

I'd hit it.

...with little "Number Two".

P.S.: #20: Fucking brilliant.

"Denying that you're not pregnant" is a confirmation that you ARE pregnant. A double negative is a confirmation.

Maybe someone meant denying that she is pregnant. Who knows? Who cares?

Ahhhhh, Jacq. Fucking priceless. Just typing 'Stupid Baby' makes me laugh.

Number Two was number two on the list; double entendre, anyone? I bet she'd name it that because she's either not sure which hole it came out of or because that's how high she can count and it's convenient that the Cletus-Fetus will be... number two!

/laughs quietly, maniacally, to self... stupid baby...

I am glad she is expecting! She deserves a baby! As far as what howard Stern is saying-well his track record isn't too impressive! She has to do what a girl has to do!!!!