April 18, 2006
Tom Cruise almost kills interviewer

Tom Cruise recently walked out of an interview with Swedish newspaper Aftonbladet Söndag after the reporter brought up his ex-wife Nicole Kidman.
The conversation was all smiles until reporter Björn Benkow insisted that experts say that dyslexia cannot be cured by Scientology as Cruise has claimed. There was an awkward pause, then Cruise burst into laughter. “I’m going to, in any case, admit that you have the courage of a madman,” according to our translator. “This is something no journalist has dared say to me face-to-face. . . . Scientology is a religion without divinity. Its teaching is a spiritual liberation from life’s problems that can only be reached through advice, courses and deep studies. Your cynical media colleagues cast doubt over all the good that we do by spreading a bunch of hocus pocus about us.”Then the reporter mentioned Kidman and the two children that she and Cruise adopted. “Now you’ve gone over the line,” Cruise replied. Then, according to Benkow, one of Cruise’s two bodyguards put his hand on the reporter’s shoulder, and Cruise said: “Now, unfortunately, I have to end this, Mr. . . . ?”
“Benkow,” the reporter replied.
“Whatever,” Cruise replied. “I have to move on.”
I like how the bodyguard stepped in for that extra bizarro-world oomph. It's not an official Tom Cruise moment until he says something ridiculous, jumps up and down on the furniture, or threatens you with physical violence.
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Comments
1. Posted by rmeno on April 18, 2006 4:43 PM
Another crazy story...
2. Posted by mamacita on April 18, 2006 4:45 PM
Dude, I bet that reporter, Knifebladet Sundawg almost shit his Swedish pants. I wonder if, when Swedish people get really scared, do they start babbling like the Swedish Chef. Verdy, verdy, verdungen.
3. Posted by mamacita on April 18, 2006 4:46 PM
Wow. That's the most times I've ever said "Swedish" in a 30-second period.
4. Posted by jugsgirl on April 18, 2006 4:48 PM
tom's publicist needs to get him under control. i can only handle so many wacko cruise stories a day.
5. Posted by BarbadoSlim on April 18, 2006 4:48 PM
God I hope he goes all Tom Cruise on some reporter's ass, and that he gets arrested and then he'll be raped...with penises, by large men.
6. Posted by Grphdesi23 on April 18, 2006 4:49 PM
The fact that Tom Cruise said 'hocus pocus' proves that Scientology is not a religion, but a cult.
7. Posted by Land-Man on April 18, 2006 4:49 PM
Derrrr. HAHA mamacita, you stupid bastard.
8. Posted by Tom Cruise = Cult Puppet on April 18, 2006 4:49 PM
I heard the actual disagreement happened when the reporter wouldn't consent to Tom giving him the Dirty Sanchez.
Oh yeah, Tom Cruise loves the cock.
9. Posted by Grphdesi23 on April 18, 2006 4:49 PM
Tom Cruise is so predictable about what he's going to be angry at, it's as if he's reading a script......
10. Posted by Jacq on April 18, 2006 4:50 PM
The reporter said, so Tom I hear you love the cock. Before he could finish the sentence, Tom whipped it out and said YESSSSS! Then the reporter asked where Tom had hidden Katie's body. He told them it was in a Tupperware container in his closet. It was all down hill after that.
Herndy skerndy derndy, Mamacita, snorken blaffin. I love the Muppets.
11. Posted by TonyAlmeida on April 18, 2006 4:51 PM
“Whatever,” Cruise replied. “I have to move on.”
Poor Katie. After she fails to lose the baby weight in 4 weeks, she'll hear this, too.
12. Posted by mamacita on April 18, 2006 4:52 PM
@7
I prefer to be called only gender specific expletives, such as bitch, cunt, whore, etc. Please and thank you.
13. Posted by oshkoshb-goshdammgosh on April 18, 2006 4:52 PM
Remember when that reporter sqirted Tom Cruise in the face with the gag-mic? I bet he wouldn't be so mad if it was a penis. ("You know what you are? You're a jerk!")
I'm just sayin'.
14. Posted by oshkoshb-goshdammgosh on April 18, 2006 4:53 PM
*squirted* Whoa, dude. Gnarly.
15. Posted by Jacq on April 18, 2006 4:55 PM
Land-man, where DID you get that snazzy name? Is it because you want something the size/shape of Florida shoved up your rectum?
Papa knows I take a Dirty Sanchez like a champ. If you tell them where the evidence is, I'll go all Kim on you. I'll eat your kittens.
16. Posted by SoNotTrue on April 18, 2006 4:55 PM
It just gets worse. At what point is he going to hole up and let things blow over? He probably can't do it, secretly loving even negative press.
17. Posted by I love K-fed's Corn Rolls on April 18, 2006 4:56 PM
I hope he chokes to death on the placenta.
And the reporter is not the "madman" in this combo... that would be Cock Lovin' Cruise.
18. Posted by MOCKERFOCKER on April 18, 2006 4:56 PM
Wasn't Tom in a movie called "Losin' It"?. Interesting....
19. Posted by BarbadoSlim on April 18, 2006 4:56 PM
I did some research, and *cough* *cough* and the phrase: "whatever, I need to move on", actually transalates to: "cock is cool and I love it" in swedish.
So Mr. Cruise was being polite and forthcoming.
20. Posted by Jacq on April 18, 2006 4:58 PM
Oshkosh, everyone knows that a penis loves a jerk every now and then.
I saw the actual footage, but it should have gone...
Reporter: Tom, you know how I know (you're gay?/ TCLTC?)
Tom: Uh..
Reporter: *blammo!*
I love me a good cheap shot.
21. Posted by PapaHotNuts on April 18, 2006 5:00 PM
It's true, Jacq is a dirty sanchez pro- I've seen the pics.
And if I'm a reporter, and Tom Cruise get all pissed at me like he's going to fight, I'm going to beat him like a Cabbage Patch Doll. They're the same size, but only one of them can fight, and the other is Tom Cruise.
22. Posted by caddachrome on April 18, 2006 5:00 PM
CRUISAZY!!!!!!!
23. Posted by Land-Man on April 18, 2006 5:01 PM
Jacq-off. The only thing that's the size and shape of Florida is my unit, which is currently in your wife/girlfriend.
24. Posted by juicyju on April 18, 2006 5:03 PM
I can't believe no one has noted that his bodyguard is actually Cameo of "Word Up" fame.
Seriously, bad stache on the dude in the background. Word up
25. Posted by Trotter on April 18, 2006 5:03 PM
...one of Cruise’s two bodyguards put his hand on the reporter’s shoulder, and Cruise said:...
That must be a typo. We all know that it was TC who "put his hand on the reporter's COCK and said: unfortunately, I'll have to eat this."
26. Posted by mamadough on April 18, 2006 5:03 PM
what's does it take to get this assbag locked up? and why the fuck is he in sweden? im hoping he does something horrible while he's in another country, because they don't tolerate shit like they do here. when americans go elsewhere and fuck up, they're punished.
usa: tom cruise says," i lick donkey dick and plan to eat "my" baby. you oppose me, i'll suck your dick and then kill you." it's ok, he's a celebrity and can do whatever the fuck he wants.
anywhere else: "tom, you threatened a dude and to eat "your own" spawn, your ass in sitting in prison and when you've been denied a thorough pounding in the ass from big bubba, you'll have learned your lesson. we don't give a shit who you are."
God, i am waiting for that day.
TOM CRUISE LOVES THE COCK.
27. Posted by Land-Man on April 18, 2006 5:06 PM
The guy in the background is Wesley Snipes's retarded brother, Lou Snipes. I don't know why Carlos Mencia is in the picture though.
28. Posted by mamacita on April 18, 2006 5:07 PM
Silly Land-Man. Jacq is a girl, you fucking idiot. And she likes the hot beef injection, not a clam sandwich.
29. Posted by UNWASHEDMASSES on April 18, 2006 5:08 PM
The real reason for the interview coming to an abrupt end is actually a miscommunication. In Swedish, "How are Nicole and the kids," sounds like "Is it true you love the cock?" To which Cruise haughtily declared before walking out, "I don't love it, I absolutely adore it!"
30. Posted by sometimesboy on April 18, 2006 5:09 PM
this 'bodyguard' is actually a representative of the church of scientology...he's there to enforce the groups 'silent interviewing' policy...it's easy...step one...place hand on interviewers shoulder....step two...insert pacifier...
31. Posted by bigponie on April 18, 2006 5:21 PM
I have discovered a new family genus that tom and wacko jacko both belongs too...
homo-erectus-takey-upda-astus.
32. Posted by shell on April 18, 2006 5:23 PM
Will he not put on the freakin' Nikes already and drink the damn Kool Aid?
33. Posted by Celetina on April 18, 2006 5:28 PM
This is the funniest thing I've read all day. A journalist mentions that dyslexia might not, in fact, be curable by fake religion, and Tom Cruise responds by commending his courage about "daring" to make such an audacious remark to His Highness the Duke of Dicklickin'. The man is a raging egomaniac; nobody else would interpret an innocent question as a personal attack. But no, it's all about him. Disgusting.
34. Posted by civilwarsoldier on April 18, 2006 5:31 PM
Keep in mind that Tom Cruise never finished High School. He is an idiot and anything he says or does is immature, since he never grew up. Poor Katie, since she was offered a chance at college. Cruise, would never get the chance, since he probably couldn't attend any college unless he gave big bucks. I used to like the guy, but I will NEVER pay for another movie of his. He is just CREEPY.
35. Posted by MeganHarris on April 18, 2006 5:41 PM
Wow. This says a lot about his weird little world. Those weren't even offensive questions! they were facts!
36. Posted by krisdylee on April 18, 2006 5:54 PM
Oh, Tom. You try too hard.
37. Posted by Giggles on April 18, 2006 6:23 PM
#5 I love you :-)
38. Posted by Giggles on April 18, 2006 6:25 PM
#33 I love you too :-)
39. Posted by cibby on April 18, 2006 6:38 PM
I'm not sure that these Tom Cruise stories are real. I think you're all making them up.
Did you see Cocktail? That was a pretty normal Tom Cruise.
Otherwise, it just gives me shivers...
40. Posted by Jacq on April 18, 2006 6:41 PM
#27 - Carlos Mencia? You are an asswipe. You are the new Kim and we haven't seen her since the day that we feasted on her self-esteem and dignity.
WHERE'S THE BEEF!?!
41. Posted by beadkween on April 18, 2006 6:43 PM
Someone needs to knock this little prick off his elevator shoes. He talks down to people like he is some kind of God. I say we boycott MI3 and hit this guy where it will hurt the most - in his ass.... oops, I mean in his wallet. His ass is used to getting reemed. He likes cock cuz he doesn't have one of his own...Nicole knows I bet....
42. Posted by Italian Stallion on April 18, 2006 7:06 PM
Coming this summer "K-PAX 2, The Scientology Story".
Kevin Spacey's role will be played by a heterosexual Tom Cruise in a bizarro world because we all know........
43. Posted by Land-Man on April 18, 2006 7:20 PM
Jacq, from now on, when I say "suck my dick" you say "do you want me to lick your balls too daddy".
44. Posted by colormeskanky on April 18, 2006 7:28 PM
The courage of a MADMAN? don't flatter yourself, Tom. It doesn't take that much courage to say, "You're wrong," to a mentally challenged midget.
This is the first time I've seen the words "madman" and "tom cruise" not refering to each other.
45. Posted by colormeskanky on April 18, 2006 7:30 PM
#31 hahahaha good one
46. Posted by vigilex on April 18, 2006 7:33 PM
It could've been worse you know..he could've got the poor reporter pregnant with the frozen semen of L. Ron Hubbard like he did with Katie
47. Posted by Italian Stallion on April 18, 2006 7:57 PM
#43 Land Mine, I go by Italian Stallion, not daddy......that would be to weird....and I don't share.....
48. Posted by bunnyhugger on April 18, 2006 8:17 PM
tom cruise needs to do a little driving without his seatbelt.
wishful thinking.
49. Posted by seaglass on April 18, 2006 8:56 PM
Looks like more swift roundhouse kicks to the face for another hapless journalist.
50. Posted by ESQ on April 18, 2006 9:28 PM
Was that interviewer from the "Howard Stern show" GOD I loved it when they would do mock-interviews.
That's right Tom, move on, move on.
51. Posted by Hara on April 19, 2006 12:37 AM
I’m going to, in any case, admit that you have the courage of a madman . . . This is something no journalist has dared say to me face-to-face."
Why should this journalist fear? Because Cruise is in Mission mother-f-ing Impossible that's why. Sure I've never seen any of the MI movies but I'm sure he kicks a serious amount of @$$. Why?
http://www.cbsnews.com/images/2006/04/05/imageNYET18604051956.jpg
This is the face of a cold hearted killer. Remorseless, Ruthless, After-birth eating. I don't believe he would hesitate to murder whoever pisses him off, eat the raw flesh (since he seems to have a taste for blood), and throw the remains at oprah.
He's such a bad ass. Suck on that Brad Pitt. Literally, because, dare I say, Tom Cruise is pretty fond of the homoerotic action.
52. Posted by joeqpublicus on April 19, 2006 2:56 AM
Someone should tell Tom dyslexia isn't the only thing Scientology can't cure they also seem to have a doozy of a time curing homosexuality but dear old straight as an arrow Tom wouldn't know anything about that right?
53. Posted by junebug on April 19, 2006 5:00 AM
I think his father might have beat him retarded. seriously.
54. Posted by Conductor71 on April 19, 2006 5:49 AM
My hatred for this conceited fucktard has reached such epic proportions that I cant even make jokes about him any more - arrogance and gross stupidity are such a bad mix
55. Posted by Jacq on April 19, 2006 12:59 PM
#43 - Sure, I'll suck it. Then, when you start to relax, I'm going to bite it off. Police will find you passed out in the parking lot of a Costco with an inexplicable candle in your ass.
Thanks Stallion, you are the only person who is allowed to take me against my will.
Now that the baby is born, I can't wait to start making fun of her. Let me guess... lesbian? A father like that would make me hate men, too.
56. Posted by nortex001 on April 19, 2006 9:14 PM
What's the big deal. Cruise set rules for the interview and the numbnuts interviewer broke them. Pick you poison, agree to the rules, follow them, and get the interview or just get fucking stupid. That dumb kraut should get fired.
57. Posted by mamacita on April 19, 2006 9:38 PM
@50
Hey numbnuts, krauts are Germans, not Swedes. I guess that kind of fucks up that whole insult thingy you had happening.
58. Posted by gogoboots on April 20, 2006 12:40 AM
It's like he can't even logically conversate with someone about Scientology and Nicole Kidman because he gets all angry and wants to jump on them...and not even him, his bodyguards! He's just bizarro!
59. Posted by mamacita on April 20, 2006 8:14 AM
@58
Did you just say "logically conversate"? Because conversate=not a word.