Apr 26 2006Teri Hatcher almost loses her eye

And people say there is no God. Free Edna!

Just a few inches lower and it could have severed her jugular. Then, we the public, would have been spared watching this skanky hag die a slow death from starvation. Not that it wouldn't be fun, but damn, there's only so much of looking at her hungry ass that I can take. And what the hell is wrong with the piece of glass that it couldn't just do its job? I demand a refund!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yo ho ho and a bottle of cum.

And is she ever a ho. Free Edna!

if only she had gotten a patch to hide that ginormous bulging vein in her forehead.

Maybe Edna is actually a nice person...maybe Terri Hatcher said that and that's why someone threw the glass in her eye!

Maybe Edna is actually a nice person...maybe Terri Hatcher said that and that's why someone threw the glass in her eye!

who's edna and why is everyone talking about her?

Maybe Edna is actually a nice person...maybe Terri Hatcher said that and that's why someone threw the glass in her eye!

Has anyone else mentioned that Edna is a raging fecalpheliac as well.

what is with the det of desperate housewives? first some pole falls on eva longoria and now a lightbulb explodes to damage teri's cornea.

I'm sorry if I've sent my comment more than once-my computer is mucking up... I've told u Edna I WILL NOT be you lesbian life partner, stop messing around with my stuff!!

*set

obviously teri got a cumshot to the eye again...

Aaar, Aaar, me mateys, there be botox in them crevasses Aaar AAR!!!! urgh Aar them crevices are old Aaaar!! not spectacular ye land lubbers.

laaaand HO!!

I can honestly say that I have scratched my Cornea. With a hanger. The whole right side of my face had to be covered. I looked like phantom of the opera.

I went to a party that night, boy was I hot. My pick up like for the night was "Hey can I walk your plank?"

It was a Land-Shot, Fisher55. From my Land-Balls to God's ear.

Man, what a sad way to get attention..

When are these tabloids gonna start telling the truth so I don't have to?

When asked if she had been kissing Ryan Seacrest she replied. "I wouldn't be caught dead kissing that obvious homosexual to further his career." "If I was kissing Ryan Seacrest may Stallions cum shot hit me straight in the eye next time I give him a blow job."

Need I say more........

WORST BLOW JOB EVER.........

Im over teri hatcher. Im over her.

I washed she had lost the eye then I could pop out the glass eye and no I can't say it

I'll say it. Skull fuck her?

Gross. Her cut cornea is profane and makes me uncomfortable.... REPORTED.

Nope. It just isn't the same. Maybe Teri will eat to take her mind off the eyeball pain. That would be nice.

Teri almost loses an eye, Hilton almost electrocutes herself, maybe those powers Xenu gave Cruise in exchange for his first born do work.

careyann: next time have a doctor perform the abortion, sweetiepie

Enough already. Must we hear about everything in poor Teri's life? First it was salacious tidbits about her love life and a van down by the river. Then it was the molestation she waited 14 years to come forward with. Now this. I can't wait to read about the terrible shit Teri's going to take after eating bad Mexican food. Or how she can't do anal because of her uncle.

Test?

oh ferchrissakes...of COURSE she almost lost her eye. she's like that whiny girl in junior high who was always "spraining her ankle" in gym class and going to the nurse's office because she "didn't feel good."

I'm not sure she did scratch her eye- well atleast not from a 'freak exploding lightbulb I think she looked in the mirror, saw what we see and didn't want to believe it and so starting scratching her eyes out!

That picture doesn't even look like her. There aren't enough wrinkles, cum stains & whorish eye makeup. And this chick's hair actually looks washed & healthy.

Fucking yikes.

http://www.perezhilton.com/topics/whitney_houston/is_bobbi_kristina_taking_mommys_medicine_20060425.php

Scary Snatcher lives in a van
"Down by the river!"

I miss you Chris Farley...

I happen to have a thing for dirty pirate hookers. Teri is just too old to qualify.

I think she looks good in this picture... 20 years younger... ah the old days...

Why is a pic of Catherine Zeta-Jones being used here?

Word on the street is a male stripper poked her in the eye with his "cocktail straw" when she was out partying with Janice Dickinson the other night.
You know, because on the streets them niggaz got to know the deal - Terri Hatcher ain't exactly what it do, feel me?

she's is kinda annoying isn't she?

Not really, I quite like Oshkosh.

damn almost first...one day I shall triumph

oh and tcltc

Whew! That was close! If that piece of glass had cut the gi-normous vein in her forehead she would have bled to death.

#23 I was thinking the same thing but "almost" isn't a gift of Zenu dammit. Les "almost" electrocuted/eye gouged out and more "definetely."

#19 Over her? When were you under her? Tell us about that.

The right half of her face is covered? Teri Hatcher just became 50% more attractive!!!! Congrads Teri!

Wanna know what's fun to do with the blind? When they are ta tap tapping their way around, put bricks in front of the cane so they think its a wall. Then, when they turn around use one of those "air-horns in a can" from inches away, they fall over 100% of the time. The only thing more fun than that is taking a dump on Land "man"

or d.p.ing biatcho!

I JERKED OFF IN TERRI HATCHERS LIBTARD EYE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Up next, Teri Hatcher stubs toe in bathroom. Film at 11.

Christ, when you're so ugly that lightbulbs would rather blow themselves up rather than be near you, I think it's time to give up the whole "acting" dream.

44: I consider myself a fairly knowledgeable vulgar person. But I have hit the booze already... can you confirm DPing? dirty pussying? dick picking? dyke plowing?

My word biatcho, I am disappointed. Double penetrating.

MONEYSHOT

ooohh! that's so fucking obvious. I am a retard. And I feel shame. Shoot away... I deserve it.

Like she never took a shot in the eye..........IN A VAN DOWN BY THE RIVER !!!!

RIP Chris Farley

I just wanted to make 3 in a row, got nuthin insultin....wait, insulin! any diabetics out there! Eat sugar and do the funky chicken for me! Darwinism...darr win izm...der wen izm. How the fuck do Americans say it?

45-51 Fuck I am slow when I am drunk! Biatcho, yes, it is double penetrating, but with what object may I ask? Although, what may I ask went thru your seriously fucked up head (luv it!) about what "dirty pussying " could posssibly mean....could be a new trend!

53: Off the top of my head & because I'm clear out of tampons, it's gotta be when you're ragging it & all out of tampons. And who owns maxi-pads these days? That, my friend, is dirty-pussying.

Or just getting fucked really hard that it bleeds... that's abouther reason for dirty pussy.

Or like MeganHarris, when you rub it* so hard thinking of Kirsten Dunst's titties all up in your face that it bleeds & then you don't wash it for a week.

* MeganHarris' clitoris

by the way 52 - what the piss are you talking about?

G-rad T-rent,

Excellant use of "my word" *say like Mr. Belveder* old chap....nice to know you weak ass brit (intentionally uncapitalized) men know about dp...all about dp. Honour. Colour. And othour "mispelled" words. Ms. or Mrs. Biatcho, SERIOUSLY, what did you think of when "dirty pussy-ing" went thru your mind? I gott know!! that shit slays me!

Blood is just nature's lubricant for those not quite wet enough days.

And it just dawned on me. It's been so long for the Diceman. For you Teri:

Georgie Porgie, puddin and pie,
jerked off in his girlfriend's eye.
When her eye was dried and shut,
Georgie fucked that one-eyed slut.

57: You wanna find out? I'll show you. No more of this pussyfooting around damn it! Let's get down to brass tacks people.
Oh wait, according to Fisher55 none of us exist so I'm going to go take a shower and think of meganharris' hairy clitoris.

WTF? I like women, I'm not British.

#52
saw my chance at 3 times fame..put that in quotations.! I know I misspelled that. Was just trying to make 3 comments in a row, but I hav been drinking since 4 o clock midwest time (I live in CO, visiting for work) Dude! You are friggin hilarious! DP ing in your perspective...wow Hey, u know what you call a black man flying an airplane? the pilot you fucking racist!!!!!!!!!!!!1

57

Yah baby! the time frame on these posts is trippy, we all write at times according to the posts and our schedule and the superfish puts it chronilogical.
G. t. (I am 2 lazy to type it out)I see the words "my word" and think Limey. sorry. Biatcho, can you think of me a little, for my self esteem....I am 6'2", brown hair, green eyes, trimmed beard, 175 lbs, and I climb on roofs for a living. not kidding. please tell me that does something, or Iwill cut my balls off and become an accountent

Shit, I posted all kinds of wicked stuff about alcaholics (me), how I wanna bang Biatcho, and canadieaeaeaeaeaeans......like you matter. server erased it, my genius gone. biatcho, dirty or not, I will eat it like a SUNDAY!!! or puke and then eat it like a SUNDA!!!!!!

going to bed now. Love all.

@ #32....I have a thing for guys named Gerald Tarrant....Let's hook up.

Score.

That's why I have a thing for dirty pirate hookers. They cant resist my name.

An anorexic mannish pirate? Oh do tell!

63 holy christ we look exactly alike! My beard is also trimmed but my "area" is all out of sorts. Just a little something for you to think about. I'm out of here for the weekend fucko! enjoy.

Dirtypiratehooker, you will have to share Gerald with me. I saw him first. But that's ok. I like pirates too.

That's cool, I have a thing for saints.

........

Jesus Christ am I weird sometimes....but a deal is a deal *buys calculator, accounting for dummies, and scissors*

Teri now has a wonky eye like Paris Hilton. "Eye wonkiness is like so hot right now." - Paris Hilton