April 3, 2006
Star Jones gets a football to the face
The only thing funnier than Star Jones getting knocked out by a football is Star Jones getting knocked out by my fist. It's not that I hate clumsy fat people, I just hate Star Jones.
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Comments
1. Posted by imabeeatch on April 3, 2006 4:59 PM
First..
The fugly ass biatch is getting a makeover!
2. Posted by xAgonyxScenex on April 3, 2006 4:59 PM
The fact that The View is publicly making light of the situation makes it less funny. Besides, it really wasn't that funny to begin with. Looks old too.
3. Posted by sirokai on April 3, 2006 5:00 PM
I don't know who Star Jones is, but I think this is the perfect place to mention that TS is TOTALLY SCREWING WITH MY BROWSER (Firefox). I have to use Opera to access TS. Considering that TS is like food to me right now, this is a serious problem.
4. Posted by imabeeatch on April 3, 2006 5:03 PM
I think I'm seeing "star"s. hehehe
5. Posted by LRonHubbaHubba on April 3, 2006 5:06 PM
Star Jones is a dildo.
6. Posted by AsIWasSaying on April 3, 2006 5:07 PM
Her husband like dildo.
7. Posted by CheekyChops on April 3, 2006 5:13 PM
in his a-hole.
8. Posted by Cratylus on April 3, 2006 5:13 PM
sirokai,
That's what you get for using a browser built by hippies.
9. Posted by ob1 on April 3, 2006 5:20 PM
Apparently, someone told her fat ass to catch the "pig skin", so she tried to...with her mouth.
10. Posted by PapaHotNuts on April 3, 2006 5:22 PM
Maybe it's a coincedence, but the part of that video where she fell, happened simaltaneously as the earthquake that struck the ocean floor and caused a tsunami that wrecked Indonesia last December.
Also, she tried to catch it with her mouth because Jason Sehorn called the football a "pigskin" and she thought it might be food.
11. Posted by playahater101 on April 3, 2006 5:23 PM
I have to agree with the guy at the end. "You can't see Star Jones get hit with that football enough."
12. Posted by mrs.t on April 3, 2006 5:30 PM
and this is funny because........it's old?
now, if we could actually SEE the full-frontal-face-hit, that would be something.
13. Posted by HughJorganthethird on April 3, 2006 5:43 PM
Not nearly as satisfying as the "Star Jones get's a Rocket Propelled Gernade to the Face" clip we are all eagerly awaiting.
14. Posted by krisdylee on April 3, 2006 5:44 PM
Know what's funnier? The fact that she was getting her wrinkly saggy tits lifted (after her 794.5 pound weight loss) in a vain attempt to look somewhat human, and almost dies.... Now that's comedy.
15. Posted by Erienne on April 3, 2006 5:45 PM
sirokai-
I think it might just be your computer...I only use Firefox and TS loads/runs just fine...virus scan maybe? or make sure you have the newest Firefox or something. good luck
16. Posted by Jay from the Bay on April 3, 2006 5:49 PM
I love hearing her scream out in pain. It would only be funnier if instead of a football, it was a flaming crate of camel crap that smacked that biatch down. Boom.
17. Posted by Jay from the Bay on April 3, 2006 5:50 PM
I love hearing her scream out in pain. It would only be funnier if instead of a football, it was a flaming crate of camel crap that smacked that biatch down. Boom.
18. Posted by that-dog-is-shifty-eyed on April 3, 2006 5:52 PM
Oh my nose! I'm never going back to skewl!
19. Posted by Italian Stallion on April 3, 2006 5:59 PM
I have to say that this was really stupid, not to be like everyone else, but the Tsunami comment has me still laughing while typing.....
20. Posted by Grphdesi23 on April 3, 2006 6:18 PM
I LOVE THIS VIDEO! INSTANT CLASSIC!
21. Posted by nbk on April 3, 2006 6:18 PM
I guess she didn't want to wear a helmet with a face mask because she wanted to show her face. I really like what Jon Stewart said on the Daily Show "Star Jones is a woman who lives 3 feet up her ass". That shoulder pads would be put to good use if she cover her dumb head with it.
22. Posted by oshkoshb-goshdammgosh on April 3, 2006 6:42 PM
This is almost as good as the video I made of Kelly Ripa tied down and naked getting her face eaten slowly by pigeons. The trick is I covered her face with bird seed. I'm savvy like that.
23. Posted by Carolina on April 3, 2006 6:53 PM
what?!
Someone shit on the coats!!
Someone shit on, around or about the coat area!!!!
What?!
24. Posted by MizScarlett on April 3, 2006 7:05 PM
Thanks to all for kicking me when I'm down.
- Mrs. Jones-Reynolds
(Al? AL!! I want to make a salad.. what happened to all the cucumbers? And WHERE THE HELL ARE MY CHEESE WAFFIES??)
25. Posted by Kelly on April 3, 2006 7:22 PM
Star looks human? What are you kiding? She looks like Michael Jackson's surgon fvcked up her face. Guess she inpired to look like the seahag from little mermaid that or a tranie. Maybe her husband loves that, looks like a man feels like a dried up sponge!!!
26. Posted by mamacita on April 3, 2006 7:25 PM
Hmmm. I guess it's only her husband who likes balls in the face.
27. Posted by krisdylee on April 3, 2006 7:29 PM
aaaaaggghhhh, I just had a vision of Star and Al in the throes of lovemaking... her joggly loose skin hanging over Al and him closing his eyes tight thinking hard about penises... that poor bastard. ick. She drives me to drink, her grandiose idea that she's all that AND a bag of chips...
28. Posted by krisdylee on April 3, 2006 7:30 PM
oh, mamacita, I do love your wit...
29. Posted by Jay from the Bay on April 3, 2006 7:34 PM
#24 No problem Star, you fat ape. I hope your surgery on your hairy, wrinkly, streched out flap jacks still hurts. No matter what you do, you're still an ugly zit on the the ass of humanity. BTW, you know your "husband" is a cucumber cramming homo, don't cha? I can't wait for the day Joy Behar just hauls off and beats your ass like a runaway slave and Barbara poisons your KFC.
30. Posted by Star Maker Machinery on April 3, 2006 7:51 PM
"Star, food goes in here" (points to mouth).
She should stop letting her husband do all of the grocery shopping. Her all-cucumber diet is clearly having an effect on her motor skills.
31. Posted by HollyJ on April 3, 2006 7:59 PM
Off hand, I can only think of one female body shape worse than Star Jones
http://www.shanghaiist.com/archives/2006/03/21/yao_defen_the_t.php
32. Posted by Baysharam Guru on April 3, 2006 8:34 PM
I know it may be wrong on so many levels but that Star makes me horny
33. Posted by Grphdesi23 on April 3, 2006 8:41 PM
I am sure Star Jones and her husband Al's marriage is one in the form of a contract. She marries him and he gets to stay in the closet.
Al's new nickname should be "Queen of the damned."
34. Posted by NewGuy on April 3, 2006 8:50 PM
blablablablablablabl fat joke blablablablablablablablablablabla fat joke blablablablablabla ugly blablablablablablablablablablablablablablabla aren't I witty and original blablablablablablablablablablablabla fat joke blablabla
You're all boring idiots.
35. Posted by Trotter on April 3, 2006 9:02 PM
This was fun, but we all know what we really want is to see Star hurled from a trebuchet into a Texas BBQ pit.
36. Posted by LeslieH on April 3, 2006 9:13 PM
I was going to care, but then I remembered the whole thing was about Star Jones and I died a little on the inside because I wasted 30 seconds of my life trying to comprehend & process everything.
37. Posted by krisdylee on April 3, 2006 9:14 PM
NewGuy, I feel as though you are crying out for help. Lay your head on my shoulder and let it out, baby. That's right, now suck my booby you wittle sweetie-pie... aaahhh, that's nice.... what a good boy. Mama loves you, yes she does... now run along and go buy mama a six-pack and some malboro lights. Git!!!
38. Posted by Chris'sMom on April 3, 2006 9:18 PM
Wow NewGuy, why don't you try pulling the stick, err, cucumber out of your ass. If you haven't noticed, TS is all about people posting what they think about how dumb/ugly/fat/etc. celebrities are. If you can't handle that then go hook up with Star's husband, maybe you two can enjoy a cucunber diet. That is if you don't already do that. Dumbass.
39. Posted by suzy on April 3, 2006 9:19 PM
that's old... she even made fun of herself after watching that clip on their 2000th episode
i'm surprised you didnt report on her boob lift superficial
40. Posted by Trotter on April 3, 2006 9:22 PM
Wait. Didn't she recently get a gastric bypass? Are we going to lose the opportunity to mock her morbid obesity?
41. Posted by NewGuy on April 3, 2006 9:38 PM
I'd love to suckle on your nips Kris, but those things haven't received any attention from a man in so long I think your milk has curdled... Or is that cellulite?
nasty.
42. Posted by Qdarks on April 3, 2006 9:58 PM
Football: 1 Star Jones: 0
lol
43. Posted by hafaball on April 3, 2006 10:10 PM
Damn it ob1, you took what I was gonna say XD ummm...five hours ago o.o
44. Posted by krisdylee on April 3, 2006 10:12 PM
hee hee... Hey NewGuy, my tits are fucking fabulous, and so is my ass.. just ask my hubby who pounded me into orgasmic oblivion last night..... wait, just remembering it.... ooohh gawd, it was awesome!!!
45. Posted by sweetcheeks on April 3, 2006 10:34 PM
Does anybody even WATCH the View? Why is she a celebrity? If being fat, obnoxious and having saggy boobs make you a celebrity, Jacksonville Florida is fucking Rodeo Drive. I mean it.
46. Posted by Trotter on April 3, 2006 11:07 PM
I'd like someone to hurl a whole deep fried turkey at her face.
47. Posted by MeganHarris on April 3, 2006 11:17 PM
Heee heeeeee!
I actually just hate fat clumsy people in general.
48. Posted by Sister Morphine on April 4, 2006 12:11 AM
*laughs hysterically*
49. Posted by Drunk Blogger on April 4, 2006 1:08 AM
What a dumb C^#$. And by C^#$, I mean Conn. That's Con with an extra n. Well..I don't actually mean that, I mean something else, but I don't want to get banned.
50. Posted by boobtube on April 4, 2006 4:38 AM
finally some good news. seeing her plonk over makes me feel like its christmas morning
51. Posted by Binky on April 4, 2006 6:54 AM
She's no punt returner - she should stick to the 'O' line.
But I must admit I thought her jersey nick-name in the old WFL was good - 'She Ate Me'
52. Posted by MissAppropriated on April 4, 2006 6:59 AM
Holy holy holy fuck.
After reading these posts I realise why I love The Superficial so much.
And it ain't the articles........
53. Posted by ohnoudint on April 4, 2006 7:43 AM
I'm with Kris, Newguy definitely whines just like a "bad breast" child...and probably beats off to his VHS copies of old Jones and Jury shows (all three of them)
54. Posted by fried_noodles on April 4, 2006 8:54 AM
i'm with you on that one, MissAppropriated. hilarious, isn't it?
LOVE IT!
55. Posted by OhHowCynical on April 4, 2006 9:33 AM
I've always loved Jason Sehorn.
56. Posted by Chris'sMom on April 4, 2006 12:29 PM
NewGuy...if we are all boring idiots why do you keep coming back? Do you like being insulted? Seems like a lack of attention from the real world thing to me...Oh I know, try being less bitchy and you would make friends. Kinda reminds me of the kids in school that were always "emo" by choice because they thought people would actually give a damn but instead just wound up with everyone thinking they were stupid loner posers. Get over yourself.
57. Posted by NewGuy on April 4, 2006 12:46 PM
Chris'sMom: The only one here trying to make friends (on the internet mind you) is you... Oh and everyone else on this stupid web site.
Fuckin' pathetic.
Maybe you guys can arrange a BIG party in one of your parents basements where you can all finally meet!!! Oh goody-goody-gum-drops that would be so AWESOME!!!
Kris: You just made me throw up in my mouth. The thought of a pimply assed, fat, internet whore whose only friends are found in "chat rooms" getting plowed by her balding, over weight, ITT Tech grad who can barely get it up for her is enough to make me want to stab myself in the head with a screwdriver just to free myself from the nightmare. Blech!
58. Posted by Spindoc on April 4, 2006 1:05 PM
The video cuts off before you see her get down on all fours and start grazing.
59. Posted by Spindoc on April 4, 2006 1:06 PM
The video cuts off before you see her get down on all fours and start grazing.
60. Posted by Spindoc on April 4, 2006 1:15 PM
The video doesn't show what happened afterwards when she got down on all fours and started grazing.
61. Posted by Spindoc on April 4, 2006 1:16 PM
Fuck! I swear to god I waited like 10 min before trying that comment a third time and then the other two that had been denied showed up. DAMN YOU STAR JONES FOR MESSING UP THIS SITE!!!!!!
62. Posted by bigtuna299 on April 4, 2006 2:20 PM
I didn't know cows ate pork??????
63. Posted by krisdylee on April 4, 2006 3:26 PM
Do us all a favour NewGuy and stab yourself right now..... it woul dmake us all much more happy. The only pimple I know is you, my sweet.
64. Posted by bluepixie on April 4, 2006 4:38 PM
she doesn't just look like a retart, she certainly acts like one too!
65. Posted by ning_ning on April 5, 2006 1:35 AM
#1 till hell with ya cracka ass
66. Posted by BetC on April 5, 2006 4:13 PM
What's wrong with her anyway? Why is she playing football?