Apr 26 2006Paris Hilton still has a McLaren SLR

According to Paris Hilton's world, not being able to work the door of your $400,000 McLaren SLR gives you the right to sit on another person's Ferrari. If you left her alone in the National Archives she'd probably end up using the Constitution to wipe her ass because the toilet paper was too far.
Some more of Paris and her fancy new car after the jump.



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Reader Comments
1. Spangler - April 26, 2006 1:48 PM
um......first?!
2. tamakins37 - April 26, 2006 1:48 PM
i really want to punch her in the face!
3. Hara - April 26, 2006 1:48 PM
TOTALLY super close to first. I can smell the glory.
4. Chrystal03 - April 26, 2006 1:48 PM
and here's another dumbass, geez, dont mind the other expensive car thats in your way...I am sure that purse left some scratch marks.
5. Land-Man - April 26, 2006 1:49 PM
I'm dreaming of a blooow-jobbbb. Put it in your mouth, the instructions read.
6. Spangler - April 26, 2006 1:50 PM
I don't really have much to say about Paris Hilton. I'm not really sure why she's considered a celebrity, or why there is the need to have photographers after her taking pictures of her having trouble with her car door. Ho hum (and I do mean ho!) She's too dumb to deserve such riches. What a waste!
7. Pizzalover2K - April 26, 2006 1:51 PM
well when u guys are flippin burgers, she's humpin me :d
8. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh - April 26, 2006 1:54 PM
You know what else Paris Hilton has? An eating disorder! Those, unlike her car, are a dime a dozen.
9. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh - April 26, 2006 1:56 PM
I bet her assbones scraped the shit out of the paint job on that Ferrari, too.
10. boo - April 26, 2006 1:56 PM
she ought not wear pants like that. having no hips and a bony ass will make your pants fall off (and i'm sure we can insert a joke here but i wont go there). all i want to do when seeing this picture is yank her pants back up. annoying.
11. Hueco Mundo - April 26, 2006 1:57 PM
Poor Ferrari, looks like it needs some windex asap.
12. inspector11 - April 26, 2006 1:59 PM
give her credit, it's something she rarely does sober. that, and boys.
13. sharkbite - April 26, 2006 2:00 PM
I really don't think somebody with a brain the size of a pea should be operating such heavy machinery.
http://www.wehateeverybody.com
14. tamtamtam - April 26, 2006 2:01 PM
eewwww...she looks even more emaciated than usual. yikes. on the bright side, she's not flashing us her crotch in these pictures...
15. theyareidiots - April 26, 2006 2:01 PM
oh, I weep for the owner of the Ferrari. There's no good way to get herpes infected skank off a fine Italian paint job.
dumb bitch
16. Onrico - April 26, 2006 2:01 PM
God DAMN it! I was wondering where the hell all those scratches came from. SOB@!@ And here I am thinking It'd be safe to park next to an SLR. F-ing rich kids....
Can't figure out why the paint is peeling off the whole side of the car however....
17. BigJim - April 26, 2006 2:03 PM
Does no one else realize that this is a good thing? Those cars are, like, super fast. Faster than Land-man doing Tom Cruise in the pooper kind of fast. Faster than it takes to be first on this stupid website kind of fast.
Did I mention they were fast?
And everyone knows that speed kills.
SF's next headline: "Paris Hilton decapitated in fiery wreck -- Entire world rejoices."
18. tinkerbelle - April 26, 2006 2:06 PM
wow, in her world, she thinks she's beautiful in that outfit.
19. Aimtrue - April 26, 2006 2:06 PM
FIRST
I look at her and think wow I want to bang her then I think no oozing blistering sores and my wang droops
20. Chrystal03 - April 26, 2006 2:07 PM
Also, whats up with her shoulders, you can hang a coat on that!!!
21. biatcho - April 26, 2006 2:07 PM
Fuckng retard can't even open the goddamn door. You expect her to be able to drive it? "Why can't this thing like drive itself... I paid enough for it. Oh wait, I didn't pay for it, I only had to suck off a group of German businessman to get it".
The only thing she knows how to operate in that car is her dumb-ass boyfriends grilling machine.
22. BigJim - April 26, 2006 2:08 PM
Does anyone else think that the chick at the top of the SF page (the one missing the top of her head) is hot?
She looks like a hot porn star.
23. Gerald Tarrant - April 26, 2006 2:09 PM
@ 17 - BigJim, if jumping into an electrified pool didn't kill her, crashing a McLaren at 140 won't. She's like a disease that won't go away, or is it she has a disease that won't go away? Oh right, both.
24. lawyergirl - April 26, 2006 2:10 PM
Anyone want to see a real picture of Edna Bambrick?
http://profiles.yahoo.com/edna_bambrick
talk about obscene items on the internet
25. michelle101 - April 26, 2006 2:12 PM
that car's feeling the urge to take a shower
26. BarbadoSlim - April 26, 2006 2:12 PM
It's obvious that the McLaren is lost, no way e that a Decon team can get there in time to sanitize it. The Ferrari MIIIGHT be salvageable
27. Badhero - April 26, 2006 2:13 PM
I think she's morphing into that pill popping, anorexic, hypoglycemia ignoring, suspicious boyfriend having Sonny VonBulow. She must be taking taking Paris' body over using astral projection from her bed at the long term coma facility. I knew she'd be back! And Paris is the perfect recepticle for someone who has been sitting around for the last 20 years. Look out Klaus!
28. LuckySlide16 - April 26, 2006 2:14 PM
Now I know what to do after betting away my Bentley, and almost dieing in a electrifying pool accident, buy a more expensive car and hopefully crash it..... preferably into Tom Cruise.
29. michelle101 - April 26, 2006 2:14 PM
#24 she removed her homepage. http://jesus-is-lord.com / is was her homepage yesterday (maybe people started emailing them?)
30. Geno - April 26, 2006 2:15 PM
She is a bit chunky. Jenny Craig is calling.
http://catholictvguy.blogspot.com/
31. Chrystal03 - April 26, 2006 2:15 PM
#24, OMG, no wonder she's mad at the world!
32. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh - April 26, 2006 2:16 PM
27 - That's actually a picture of me. Here's my web site:
http://www.icey.tv/showphoto.php?photo=0005&nav=01
33. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh - April 26, 2006 2:17 PM
^that was directed at #22 actually, but everyone is invited
34. Gerald Tarrant - April 26, 2006 2:22 PM
And people wonder why I am stalking oshkosh.
35. BarbadoSlim - April 26, 2006 2:23 PM
Funny, she looks EXACTLY as someone with the name "Edna Bambrick" should look.
36. Spindoc - April 26, 2006 2:23 PM
I hope the owner of the car she's sitting on has Valtrex wipes.
37. suzy - April 26, 2006 2:24 PM
omgosh, her arms are not arms.. they're just bones
and they had her on camera on tv at a jama juice with the car like last week or something
38. BigJim - April 26, 2006 2:24 PM
#32:
Whoever that is, she qualifies as "Leave your wife and kids" kind of hot.
39. Italian Stallion - April 26, 2006 2:27 PM
Hey you guys, do you want to know something about Paris?
40. Italian Stallion - April 26, 2006 2:27 PM
She can't even spell CAR.......
41. BoobsForBob - April 26, 2006 2:27 PM
Paris, if you read this, you look fat.
42. nbk - April 26, 2006 2:28 PM
That's one fine car...
And just to think that she'd plant her herpes on the seat and then she'd wreck it next week while speeding away from the paparazzi... what a waste.
Ok so she's fucking rich and she has way more money than I would ever see in my fucking life, she still a waste of skin.
Oh fuck, why do I care? I guess I am jealous. Oh fuck, I am jealous of Paris Hilton! That thought make me wanna kill myself.
43. lurkerx - April 26, 2006 2:30 PM
Wow, why can't her car wrap itself around a pole the way she does?
Hope a roving pack of wild dogs doesn't try to bury her ass.
44. tits_on_snack - April 26, 2006 2:40 PM
Yes... But i fear that even if she ever did manage to kill herself in a car accident, it'd backfire on us, and would simply Kurt-Cobain herself into even greater eternal iconic stardom. We would be forced to endure years of "Paris Hilton: The Beautiful Life and Tragic Death of an Heiress".
45. BarbadoSlim - April 26, 2006 2:41 PM
Eeeewww, now that I look closer I can honestly say that skanky hilton looks as if she just finished pulling an all night shift of cum harvesting. She looks sticky and unwashed.
46. BigJim - April 26, 2006 2:44 PM
#45 is not the real Edna. Real Edna refers to people by posting number, not their "name."
Bring back the real Edna!
Oh, and I think I love biatcho.
47. Badhero - April 26, 2006 2:45 PM
Posted by tits_on_snack on April 26, 2006 02:40 PM
@44. Yes... But i fear that even if she ever did manage to kill herself in a car accident, it'd backfire on us, and would simply Kurt-Cobain herself into even greater eternal iconic stardom. We would be forced to endure years of "Paris Hilton: The Beautiful Life and Tragic Death of an Heiress".
Would never happen--Kurt was a talented, tortured songwriter with an illness.
Paris is just the anti-christ.
No worries there.
48. CancerNipples - April 26, 2006 2:47 PM
Fuck, she is ugly.
49. CancerNipples - April 26, 2006 2:48 PM
Oh, a LOL at "Kurt Cobain was a talented songwriter"
50. Badhero - April 26, 2006 2:50 PM
@51. Better than Paris
51. Italian Stallion - April 26, 2006 2:50 PM
In the first picture it looks like she's trying to scratch the herpes off with the car door........
52. BigJim - April 26, 2006 2:52 PM
Could it be true? Could Edna really be back? Praise Allah if she is, because I really missed her.
Oh, Edna, that photo of you is so hot. When I looked at it I blew jizz all over my keyboard.
Other people may call you fat, but I think you are a sumptious love muffin.
But I also think you're a big fat fatty. You hear that, fatty? I'm calling you fat, you big fat fatty.
53. Chrystal03 - April 26, 2006 2:53 PM
#49 Edna, What do you care what is posted on this site? If you dont like it, why do you keep coming to this site? Are you really that pathetic and miserable where you just read everyone's post to see if they say something bad. You are without a doubt the most saddest soul on this earth. You cannot save the world, please just get a job or a hobby.
54. chanel_bear - April 26, 2006 2:56 PM
for the love of edna babrick, why won't she die? i mean she gets into car accidents, and nothing...she jumps into pools that have electrical wires in them, and nothing...nick cater beats her up, and nothing...
55. pinky_nip - April 26, 2006 2:59 PM
She's obviously "scratching an itch" in that first pic. sexual or diseased; probably both.
56. BigJim - April 26, 2006 2:59 PM
Ha! Edna just reported herself.
What a big, dumb, fat fatty she is.
A fat, Jebus loving fatty.
57. pinky_nip - April 26, 2006 3:00 PM
fuck you, edna. you make me want to be dirtier than ever. i'm going to go blow all the guys at the car wash right now.
58. Dr.Rokter - April 26, 2006 3:01 PM
Enough with the fake Edna. I hate to say it, but she does actually know how to spell. And she doesn't make repeated posts within the span of a few minutes.
59. BigJim - April 26, 2006 3:01 PM
RE: "Stop this filth NOW!"
Geez, guys. It's starting to sound like she really means it. Maybe we should do like the fat fatty says and stop the filth.
Would that make you happy, you fat fatty?
60. chanel_bear - April 26, 2006 3:02 PM
hey edna, jesus called...he wanted to know if you've tried any of the other major relgions.
61. BigJim - April 26, 2006 3:03 PM
#65:
Yeah, I think you're right. Although real Edna did spell privileges as "priveledges" a while back, but everyone gets that one wrong.
62. spatz - April 26, 2006 3:03 PM
yeah thats not the real edna. poseur!
63. Mac An Ghaill - April 26, 2006 3:04 PM
Whee, my first post ever! I had to comment...If Paris Hilton sat on my car, even if it was a beat up junker, I'd have to hurt her. That is so rude.
P.S. Your sunglasses are ugly.
64. spatz - April 26, 2006 3:05 PM
oh and old edna doesnt use exclamation points like that, and wouldnt say "dizzy" she's just write out a bunch of scriptures and tell us how she has managed to get other sites shut down
65. sometimesboy - April 26, 2006 3:05 PM
paris is burning...tho mostly below the waist...
66. Jacq - April 26, 2006 3:07 PM
That's Paris' driveway and HER FERRARRI. I saw it on some gossip show the other day. I missed this site while it was down, but COME ON.
Edna, Jesus called and said, "Stop it." He's tired of listening to me pray that you'll get lost, or die, or get ass raped.
I was pissed when you came on here, but now that anger has turned to pity for whomever's inbox you're flooding. I bet if you sent your reports with delivery confirmation that you'd find no one reads them.
67. brewdick - April 26, 2006 3:07 PM
Edna im pretty sure homeland security is a little PREOCCUPIED right now and doesn't give a shit if we’re blowing off a little steam by making a few dirty jokes. why don't you go try to get pedophiles and child pornographers arrested and leave us the FUCK alone! god will be our judge NOT YOU!
68. BigJim - April 26, 2006 3:08 PM
Pinky_nip:
Where is this car wash?
Oh, and I was #69. Whoo hoo!
69. Obadiah - April 26, 2006 3:08 PM
If Parasite Hilton is so rich, why is she wearing sweatpants 95% of the time I see her?
PS
Edna, I'll return your Hustler magazine when I come over later to pick up my meth.
70. Lou - April 26, 2006 3:08 PM
# 63 that is hilarious. I thought I was the only one who blew random guys at the car wash
71. Dr.Rokter - April 26, 2006 3:09 PM
#75
If you think biatcho is the most disgusting thing on this site, clearly you've missed a great deal. That, or you're Fisher55 trying to be cute.
And I remember exactly how every woman I've ever fucked sounds. And Edna doesn't sound like you.
72. chanel_bear - April 26, 2006 3:09 PM
everybody who thinks edna is fat say "britney loves cheetohs!!!!!"
jesus called again, he said if you don't shut up he's revoking your church parking pass...
73. BigJim - April 26, 2006 3:10 PM
Edna, don't listen to brewdick. We love you. Seriously, we do.
We love you even though you're a big, fat fatty.
74. chanel_bear - April 26, 2006 3:12 PM
i'm with bigjim....i never thought i'd find somebody i like making fun of more than paris hilton
75. BigJim - April 26, 2006 3:13 PM
I may be a sinner, but at least I'm not fat.
76. Chrystal03 - April 26, 2006 3:13 PM
You know what you guys, I think Edna is really the mom from "Carrie".
77. chanel_bear - April 26, 2006 3:14 PM
i thought she was the mom from trading spouses who kept revoking things in the name of jesus
78. BigJim - April 26, 2006 3:14 PM
Edna's a whale.
She also loves the cock.
Does that make her a sperm whale?
If this gets me reported, then that will be about the eighth time this week.
79. chanel_bear - April 26, 2006 3:15 PM
she hasn't reported me once...i'm starting to feel left out
80. pinky_nip - April 26, 2006 3:15 PM
@77. It's the boy scout fundraising car wash at the local church
81. spatz - April 26, 2006 3:16 PM
also edna bambrick wouldnt speak in third person. thats so not her
82. VeroMango - April 26, 2006 3:16 PM
I like hell and damnation... so, SHUT THE HELL UP!!! oh, and, in response to post 57, the superficial can't "here" your post... nor can it "hear" your post... you're typing. I'm sure they can READ what you're TYPING, but I doubt it if they already labled you as a nuisance.
83. chanel_bear - April 26, 2006 3:17 PM
@78....her sweats are always like Juicy Couture...depending they can cost up to 300 for just the pants
84. michelle101 - April 26, 2006 3:17 PM
Hey Edna,
According to Rawstory, Rove received target letter! I think they are a little too busy to be dealing with the superfical
85. BigJim - April 26, 2006 3:18 PM
#85:
That's already been said. I think it was biatcho or mamacita.
86. MeganHarris - April 26, 2006 3:19 PM
Wow. The maclaren. That car is sooooo Paris Hilton.
87. Italian Stallion - April 26, 2006 3:19 PM
#51 CancerNipples, How can you say he wasn't. I don't even want to get in an arguement over another dead musician, but Kurt Cobain was very talented. It's a shame what drugs and a stupid whore like Courtney Love can do to someone.
I'll take my beating and let your dumbass know that I named my puppy Cobain. He is a year old and was born around the same day that Kurt was found dead.
Everybody has their own opinion and it's cool, just thought I would let you know mine.
"Edna wants a cracker, maybe she would like more food, she asked me to untie her and chase away biatcho too"......
Not aimed at Biatcho at all, just read earlier that she was gonna get him banned and was laughing my ass off at that stupid cunt whore..........
88. 86 - April 26, 2006 3:21 PM
We are all just jealous.
89. BigJim - April 26, 2006 3:21 PM
Wait, is biatcho a him?
90. VeroMango - April 26, 2006 3:23 PM
I love sinning, especially when I have my premarital whore sex with my boyfriends. mmmmm....mmmmm good sinningsexysexsex.
91. Chrystal03 - April 26, 2006 3:25 PM
#85, Crap I didnt know that..I'll retract. Gripes!!
92. dies irae - April 26, 2006 3:26 PM
Edna Bambrick, you worthless piece of worm food, i know you are going to Hell, you are the one that represents the filth in this world, but it's ok, im happy about it. My buddy Asmodeus will ass rape your pathetic soul while Beelzebub will feed it with all the period blood and shit that you produced among the living. Forever, and ever.
Belive it.
93. Chrystal03 - April 26, 2006 3:27 PM
Oops, I just talked to myself. That was actually for #94...
94. maria - April 26, 2006 3:29 PM
whoa, edna, you're fat.
95. chanel_bear - April 26, 2006 3:31 PM
#101: you better be careful. edna might sit on you
96. Lou - April 26, 2006 3:32 PM
I would just like to thank Edna. Thanks to her hateful tactics I have found the Lord. Thank You Edna!!!
Psyche!!
97. Italian Stallion - April 26, 2006 3:32 PM
P.S CancerNipples is in no way, shape, or form funny and I'm one to talk believe me, I guess certain things hit certain people different ways...........
98. chanel_bear - April 26, 2006 3:34 PM
where has that loveable cunt of an edna gone anyways? i miss her when she's gone
99. Gerald Tarrant - April 26, 2006 3:36 PM
I do happen to like that McLaren. Hey Paris, want to play some poker? Not that kind you skeevy bitch, Texas Hold 'Em, wait let go of my junk. On second thought, nevermind.
100. BigJim - April 26, 2006 3:36 PM
#101:
Yeah, she might sit on your face. THAT would be a fucking nightmare.
101. diedl - April 26, 2006 3:37 PM
#29 . . if that was her actual page, holy SHIT. For those interested, at the moment, Google still has a cached version that you can still view. Looks like the queen of righteousness has gotten a little scared, eh? It's sad that it's the idiots like that who are reproducing in multitudes.
102. BigJim - April 26, 2006 3:38 PM
I would like anyone with Photoshop skills to do up something really funny with the Edna picture and post a link to it here (or on another Edna bashing thread).
Give her some kind of dominatrix outfit or something.
Please. I'm a technical moron so I can't do it.
103. penguinwaddle - April 26, 2006 3:39 PM
is edna for real?
104. chanel_bear - April 26, 2006 3:40 PM
agreeing with #111 and a shirt that says "no fat chicks"
105. chanel_bear - April 26, 2006 3:41 PM
#112- I pray to Jebus she is real. Its much funnier if she is
106. chanel_bear - April 26, 2006 3:45 PM
WELCOME BACK EDNA
107. chanel_bear - April 26, 2006 3:45 PM
how was the gangbang in the church basement?
108. diedl - April 26, 2006 3:47 PM
Dear Edna,
Before you commence your dear little (pointless and hopeless) crusade to "clean up" the internet (which by the way was first developed to more easily distribute pornography . .hello AOL) LEARN TO WRITE. Maybe then, people won't assume that you're just another ignorant redneck damning everyone with hellfire.
Here are just a few of your ridiculous errors:
@49: too should be to and here should be hear
(homonyms DO befuddle you, don't they dear...maybe if you picked up a book besides the Bible and conservative Christian propaganda once in your life, you wouldn't make these stupid mistakes)
109. gogoboots - April 26, 2006 3:48 PM
Why does she even have a car like that? Because she can...please, I'm tired of that excuse.
110. Italian Stallion - April 26, 2006 3:50 PM
#111 I bet Trotter can do it and #113 is a great touch.......
111. Iambananas - April 26, 2006 3:51 PM
Could she be more of a snotty useless person? She does nothing and gets everything... I would be ashamed of myself if I were her.
112. Italian Stallion - April 26, 2006 3:51 PM
#102 and #104 on #110 sorry
113. VeroMango - April 26, 2006 3:52 PM
guys... she finally noticed me... *cries*
I feel so special now. Oh yeah, #110, I went to the cached page. I find it ridiculous that she mentioned catholicism as a false religion considering that it and christianity are the same godfuckingdamn thing. and how the hell does she know it's all the truth? i mean, really, all of that shit have been "copied" aka handwritten over and over throughout so many years. what makes one think that it's the truth when everyone is capable of lying? who knows... maybe jebus was some psychopath murderous cow humper, and his diciples decided to make him look all holy and such... i dunno... just my opinion... JESUS ROCKS!
114. Iambananas - April 26, 2006 3:52 PM
She gave the Ferrari herpes.
115. diedl - April 26, 2006 3:52 PM
Oops, my mistake . . .my criticism was for post #57, not 49 . .I just saw the 49 at the beginning of her post....
116. Zed - April 26, 2006 3:53 PM
In that first picture, if Paris had pulled the door back really hard, she could have been squashed by it and would have fallen to the ground, hitting her head on the pavement in the process, and she could have split her head open and might have--probably would have--died!
Not that I would want such a thing to happen to her ... But she would have died, people, she would have died!!!!
This is far too much excitement for me in one day.
117. Iambananas - April 26, 2006 3:55 PM
Is that REALLY Edna, or made up??
118. D-Rock - April 26, 2006 3:56 PM
If an obnoxious fat bitch thumps her bible in the forest and nobody is there to hear it, does it make a sound?
I'm just curious. For those of you who have been reported, what has come of it? Nothing, I'm assuming. What the hell does Homeland Security care what a bunch of smart asses say about stupid celebrities?
Edna you are so full of shit. Newflash: you're going to hell, no different from all of us, simply because you read these comment boards. Repeatedly. Do something more productive, like rearrange your Precious Moments figurines or knit a scarf from the hair collected from your 14 cats.
119. pinky_nip - April 26, 2006 3:59 PM
D-Rock: I got reported. All that happened was that I had to visit the SF's principal office and he talked softly to me. And then gave me a exploding bomb pop sucker, however it was odd, because it was stuck in his pants.
120. BigJim - April 26, 2006 4:00 PM
Everyone's numbers are all fucked up in referencing other posts. Did a bunch of posts get deleted?
Chanel-bear said "welcome back Edna" but she ain't here.
What gives?
121. VeroMango - April 26, 2006 4:03 PM
one of edfucker's replies to me got deleted... maybe the editor's had enough of her horseshit.
122. jenny4a20 - April 26, 2006 4:05 PM
Id much rather be scratching my ass on a ferrari, and scratching my dumb blond head trying to figure out how the door of my hot car works so I can go pick up my valtrex than sitting here posting comments....but thats just me.
123. VeroMango - April 26, 2006 4:05 PM
looks like all of her posts were deleted.
124. BigJim - April 26, 2006 4:06 PM
I don't want her posts to be deleted. I love that big fat fatty.
Making fun of her is way better than making fun of Paris. You "read" me SF Editor? Free Edna! Free Edna! Free Edna Sperm Whale Bambrick!
125. chanel_bear - April 26, 2006 4:10 PM
free the whale!
126. VeroMango - April 26, 2006 4:12 PM
awww... her gay plot backfired on her.
127. diedl - April 26, 2006 4:13 PM
well, even if her posts have been deleted, you know she's still going to read, so we can still mock [eyes sparkle mischievously] . . .its just a bit unrequited because she can't post any more indignant replies.
128. pinky_nip - April 26, 2006 4:13 PM
What?!?! No Edna!! Come on SF!!! What's up?!?! Let us play!!
129. BigJim - April 26, 2006 4:15 PM
Yeah, it beats the shit out of working.
130. boredmilf - April 26, 2006 4:15 PM
awww... just got here and I hear Edna's gotten the boot?? *tear*
131. Italian Stallion - April 26, 2006 4:16 PM
I was wondering why that happened, I bet it was FAKE Edna and the real one got FAKE Edna deleted for using her name. Will the real FAKE Edna please stand up and let us know who you were so we can figure this out because it will drive me crazy. I thought it was BigJim but I could be wrong.
132. chanel_bear - April 26, 2006 4:16 PM
to the tune of "mandy":
oh edna,
you came and you threatened damnation,
and reported us a bunch of times,
oh edna...
133. BigJim - April 26, 2006 4:17 PM
If SF doesn't bring back Edna, then I'm going to stop spending all my money on More Cowbell T-shirts, and the advertising revenue will dry up.
We support Edna's right to freedom of speech, even if she is a big fat fatty.
134. Jesus, Thy Saviour - April 26, 2006 4:18 PM
Stallion, you have a good point, but I am the ultimate deleter-of-people.
I've got some great stories to share about Edna, seeing as how I am all-seeing. I can't share now, though, I hear my dad coming down the hall...
I'll be back in a while - and someone tell Edna Bambrick to shut the fuck up!
135. chanel_bear - April 26, 2006 4:18 PM
SF look what you did...i think bigjim might cry
136. Vas Deferens - April 26, 2006 4:19 PM
My Ferrari has warts on its fender.
Edna is an assclown.
I just reported myself.
137. BigJim - April 26, 2006 4:19 PM
Itallion Stallion, you are indeed perceptive. Without admitting anything, if it HAD been me (and I'm not saying it was), that was last Friday, when I was good and drunk (and then only a couple of times, but I'm still not saying it was me). Certainly not since then.
138. BigJim - April 26, 2006 4:21 PM
If Edna can't post here, how will she communicate with us? Whale song?
139. chanel_bear - April 26, 2006 4:24 PM
if you miss her so much, just call out "SU-EY!"and she'll come running....isn't tha how you call hogs?
140. boredmilf - April 26, 2006 4:25 PM
No worries bigjim... you were with me last friday night.... wow you were good and drunk! By the way did I leave my anal-eeze there?
141. krisdylee - April 26, 2006 4:28 PM
The only thing I have to say is, Osh, those pics are hot. And I'm not trying to do a stupid Paris imitation, but fuck, girl... goddamn it. My mouse is in my panties, again.
142. Lynette Carrington - April 26, 2006 4:28 PM
The fact that Paris Hilton could read well enough to even get a driver's license is amazing. Then to realize that she would ever be sober enough to drive a car like this just defies explanation. Wait, come to think of it, dressing like a giant tangerine wearing bug glasses....now THAT defies explanation.
143. chanel_bear - April 26, 2006 4:28 PM
eeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwww
144. Iambananas - April 26, 2006 4:29 PM
She has no butt and no shape.. how come she can't get through that little bit of room without leaning on someone elses car?
145. krisdylee - April 26, 2006 4:31 PM
Edna, I feel your beady little eyes reading our posts.
146. junebug - April 26, 2006 4:31 PM
She looks like a manequin in these photos. A slutty manequin with herpes.
...modeling a $400,000 car covered in bird shit.
...sexy.
147. krisdylee - April 26, 2006 4:32 PM
boredmilf, you left your ass-lube at my place remember? Right after your big serving of vagina ham.
148. pinky_nip - April 26, 2006 4:33 PM
"Will the real Edna Bambrick please stand up, please stand up" *to the tune of Eminem's real slim shady*
149. BigJim - April 26, 2006 4:33 PM
I'm going to rerun the best of BigJim burns Edna. From last Friday when she first graced us with her presence:
I just finished doing some more research on Edna, and this is what I came up with.
Edna: back in high school you could no longer satisfy yourself with just loving the Lord, and gave into the big handsome quarterback in the backseat of his Camaro while Stairway to Heaven was blasting on the stereo.
Fearing pregnancy, you only let him give it to you in the pooper, but then the cops showed up and you jumped up in surprise, letting his brown-tinted football player juice leak out of your chocolate starfish and down into your as yet untainted honeypot.
Nine months later, you had a technical virgin birth, but, unable to support the child, gave it up for adoption.
Your quest to rid the Internet of filth is really just a front in your desire to find your Jesus-like love child that you gave away so long ago.
Well, your search is over. He is here, and his name is PapaHotNuts.
Yeah, yeah, I know. I'm reported.
150. ptprez - April 26, 2006 4:33 PM
PLEASE SF...let that bible-belting fat cow back!!!!she brought life into my otherwise dull week-end...she sucks solid ass, but she has the right to be heard...now off to the carwash
151. Land-Man - April 26, 2006 4:35 PM
I might not have an SLR but I do have a BLC.
Land-Balls: Check
Land-Scrotum: Check
Land-Cock: Check
Land-Man is locked and loaded. Loaded with Land-Sauce.
152. BigJim - April 26, 2006 4:35 PM
Actually, it was krisdylee, uber hot west coast Canadian babe, who came up with the Carrie's mother analogy about Edna.
That was a good one.
Pray with me Carrie! PRAY!
153. pinky_nip - April 26, 2006 4:35 PM
@149 I remember that post like it was yesterday, Bigjim *sniff*... How innocent we all were back then
154. mamacita - April 26, 2006 4:35 PM
I'm so confused!!!!!!!! All the numbers are messed up and I can't figure it out. I've been staring really hard at the monitor, hoping it'll come to me in a brilliant burst of comprehension, but so far it's just making me nauseous. If someone doesn't help me understand, I'll have to go back to eating mustard out of a bowl and making boondoggle keychains.
155. BigJim - April 26, 2006 4:38 PM
mamacita:
The SF editorial Nazis deleted poor Edna, and it fucked everything up.
We want Edna back.
Bring back the fat fatty!
156. playahater101 - April 26, 2006 4:38 PM
OMG, I just started to read the posts and started laughing at #2 b/c that's EXACTLY what I was gonna write. I wanna punch her in the face, too. She WOULD wipe her herpes infested ass with the Constitution, too. Just b/c she has no appreciation for anything. Now, back to reading!
157. ptprez - April 26, 2006 4:40 PM
EDNA-EDNA-EDNA-EDNA-EDNA-EDNA-EDNA-EDNA-EDNA-EDNA-EDNA-EDNA-EDNA-EDNA-EDNA-EDNA
158. boredmilf - April 26, 2006 4:52 PM
@147 did you like?? It was my own special recipe... made with love... just for you..
159. TrannyGranny - April 26, 2006 5:05 PM
Fuck that car, it doesn't have shit on my AMC Gremlin. You can't buy cool like my ride!
160. azcoyote - April 26, 2006 5:33 PM
I still cannot get over how close to the perfect world we came when this skank nearly got electrocuted. I mean, seriously. Is it too damn much to ask that the bitch just die? God must hate us. IF her mere presence is not enough to prove that, the fact that she can swim in a pool WITH an electrical device and not die does.
Why have you forsaken me, oh, lord???
TCLTC
161. Italian Stallion - April 26, 2006 5:37 PM
I actually laughed really hard at #151
162. Jonny5 - April 26, 2006 5:42 PM
Noooo, first I love the Aston Martin DB9, then Elton John buys one...then i widdle myself over the McLaren SLR, then Paris of all people buys one.
Why..why do the cars I worship and love get their mighty images destroyed by these blasphemous C-list woofters. Fuck this, im off to play with myself over a Smart car (im British), surely no celeb will buy one of those.
163. leesbeautifulwife - April 26, 2006 5:52 PM
Yet another horrifyingly-nasty-mirror-shattering-ugly celebrity. Paris has got to have the one of the ugliest faces in showbiz...and I agree, I wanna punch her in the face too, the damage would be an improvement!
164. St.Minutia - April 26, 2006 6:03 PM
Land Man
Yes, I am the patron saint of men with very tiny penises. No, I cannot make yours bigger. Please stop calling me. Crying doesn't help.
165. radio4play - April 26, 2006 6:39 PM
wow almost first!
Ok so what about this skank again? Oh she's whore...yeah nothing new.
166. cibby - April 26, 2006 7:11 PM
It terrifies me to think of Hilton getting drunk and driving that car - smashing into children and pregnant women, getting out of the car and drunkenly slurring 'That's hot'...
167. UWaNACoOKiE - April 26, 2006 8:42 PM
Stop feeling sorry for the Ferrari people.. she owns THAT as well.
168. TrannyGranny - April 26, 2006 9:21 PM
Just dawned on me, I live in IA (Iowa for the postally retarded) and I have mumps. THIS is what it feels like to be Paris Hiltons Vagina. If I had more air flowing through me. And dick. And crabs. Shit, maybe I have it easy. And I don't live in IA. No one does.
169. SQUARE_ROOT - April 26, 2006 9:52 PM
Jesus mother fucking cum dripping Christ. I've lurked for fucking ages on this site and I only signed up because of Edna - and now the fat fuck is gone? Fuck. Fuck me. Fuck. I love that fat cunt. I want to find God - and I want to see if I can find Edna's snatch under all that fat. More rolls than a fucking bakery.
170. kylieer - April 26, 2006 10:01 PM
I am so not jealous of this stupid bitch. I think she has degraded and demoralized herself and will have to live with that for the rest of her life. She may have a lot of money but she has no ones respect...material items can only make you so happy. They cannot fill the void of having no 'true' friends, no sense values, no truly 'special' Christmas where she is soooo excited to get the bike she has been dreaming off for over a year.....nothing really special. Just money.....honestly, I feel bad for her. :(
171. Italian Stallion - April 27, 2006 12:35 AM
#169 SQUARE_ROOT quick question for you.
Whats the square root of Edna's fat ass?
172. SQUARE_ROOT - April 27, 2006 1:04 AM
#171 Italian Stallion - that's a tricky one. Given that her arse extends out of frame, I can't determine whether her arse is limited to a finite area.
I'm not even sure the accepted definition of 'ass' can even be met in this instance. Dictionary.com defines the word 'ass' to mean vulgar slang for the anus or buttocks. Given that most of the shit would seem to come out of her head; and that the region between her 'neck' and her cankles appears to be one huge sack of fat - identifying the ass region is just too difficult.
Sorry mate, I'm putting this in the 'too hard basket' - along with my cock, which is just begging to bone this tragically fat Lamington of a 'woman'.
173. Trotter - April 27, 2006 1:06 AM
@171
Stallion - here's the answer to your word problem, see Pinky:
http://lotsoflard.com/?warnDisp=yes
174. Julie_Smashing_baby - April 27, 2006 2:34 AM
#171- The square root of Edna's fat ass is 5
175. glamour_bitch - April 27, 2006 4:07 AM
Ok I obviously don't read gossip that much... how do you people know she has herpes? Ew!
176. YunGunna - April 27, 2006 6:56 AM
better being Paris with an SLR than you with a 1986 Volkswagen.
Now did I really think that?
177. Roxie - April 27, 2006 11:37 AM
If the next picture isn't of Paris getting her drawstring caught in the doors and being dragged down the street, I'm over it...
178. Digypoke - April 27, 2006 6:08 PM
On fait pas d'un ane un cheval de course... on roule dedans !
http://www.lezlife.com
179. Digypoke - April 27, 2006 6:09 PM
One does not make to ass a racehorse... one rolls inside!
http://www.lezlife.com
180. JackUup - April 28, 2006 7:48 PM
Since when can an ostrich drive a car...?
181. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh - April 29, 2006 10:30 AM
Do people say 'Jebus' instead of 'Jesus' to try to sound adorable? - because it's working!
182. mane - April 30, 2006 2:00 PM
Well i want that... Car
Peace Out...