Apr 13 2006Lindsay Lohan gets waxed

I didn't know they made skank in wax.

Are these wax statues orifice friendly?

Ha Ha...ugly ass coke head, it looks like thy gave her stretch marks as well from sucking so much cock.

I think the headline should have been "Lindsay Lohan Gets Stoned". And I don't mean stoned as in, cast in stone, like a sculpture. I also don't mean stoned, as in smoking the reefer. I mean stoned. As in hurling large rocks at her.

Is there a freelancer writing for SF today?

Ok, I don't think this resembles Hohan very much. I mean, where's the herpetic sore? The trace of coke on her upper lip? The cumstains?

Get REAL Madame Tussauds!

Nice!! but paris' hair loos fake.

then again, it looks fake in real life too.

Will the wax statues tits grow and shrink as well?

How sweet -- they made her wax statue anorexic too!

the wax paris looks better than the real paris, and the wax lindsay looks like a two-hundred year old vagabond anorexic extra from the Golden Girls with a permanent goofball smirk.

That would be a great decoraton right next to my fireplace.

In the first picture lohan looks like a lolly pop with that huge head..

All the museum needs now is a wax table with a wax mirror and some powder to put between them to give it those final touches

It looks like Paul Lynde in a long wig.

Who knew Lindsay Lohan was actually a a gay actor who's been dead for 23 years!

Lohan looks great in drag. Gay men around the world are jealous.

P.S. do they make wax cocaine?

they made linds look like a man from straight on.

and why is paris looking at linds like she is going to have sex with her? i can just imagine her saying "Mmmmmm, that's hot"

Thats not LiLo, that's Laura Flynn Boil. yeah I said boil. Her face doesn't look right but the body does.

Paris looks just like the real thing- fake.

EWWWWWWWWW!

Paris Hilton? So that's where Jessica's nose went.

oooo #2!.... Now I got the heebie jeebies...

Ashlee's nose. Damnit.

#15 paris copywrited that saying, thesuperficial.com now has to pay her royalties
;)

I hope my girlfriend reads the SF. Because if she doesn't, when I tell her "I'm gonna fuck her like a wax statue" she'll probably be really confused.

it looks like paula abdul got to the botox just in time....good for her...oh, wait...what's that.....oh....this is lynsey lohan...

i hear whilmer valdirama did anal with this statue...

i heard they were going to do a figure of ryan semencrest, but they realized that no one really likes waxed fruit...

Thats funny, because I waxed both of them month's ago......

I wonder what a wax herpe looks like?

Shouldn't there be a wax Wilmer behind Lohan?

That looks like fun...wish I could get waxed.

it's amazing - the wax figure really accurately captures her life-less and vacant quality.

I hardly recognized the wax figure of Paris. She's not digging at her twat, peeing, taking meds for herpes, flashing or fucking. Clearly it's an antiquated model of the whore.

What are they going to do when/if she gets back to a normal weight? Make another?

#16 - too generous on the lara flynn boyle comparison, i would definitely lean more towards a 'if lindsay lohan and CJ from west wing had a 40-year old test tube baby...' lines.

exhibit A: http://www.imdb.com/gallery/granitz/4080/Events/4080/AllisonJan_Grani_7065250_400.jpg?path=pgallery&path_key=Janney,%20Allison

They both look like drag queens. Lindsay looks older than my mom too. Ugh, do they really deserve wax figures of each other? This will do wonders for their egos.

I'd hit it! And by hit I mean make hot steamy monkey love to them both. And by both I don't mean the real girls, I mean the wax models.

I got mine at skankywhorewaxsexmodels.com for 39.95 each. "hey mr. postman, wait and see....waxy little sex toys for skanky ole me..."

I bet Wax Lohan smells like a country garden. And Wax Hilton smells like a mountain breeze. As long as it is a garden of rotten vaginas and the mountains are made of smegma and fish heads.

Add a wick to the top and burn baby burn.

#23 - I'm weak from laughter...waxed fruit...oh rapture...waxed fruit...HA!

And both of these wax statues are better actresses than the real things. And you can have sex with these without getting clamidia or syphillis (although it could cause waxy penis, but I'm sure they make a pill for that).

It's pretty sad when the wax statue shows more personality than the real thing.

This story was brought to us by Steph, who will be applying her high school credits in journalism to her degree in communications at Little Rock Community College. She got to ride the bus to New York and they even let her use the new digital camera. Way to go Steph!

You're right they have aged her... so much so that she's turned into Teri Hatcher.

ugh...barf

These things look like the dolls from Real Sex that are scarily realistic. I bet the Paris doll comes with a penis permanantly lodged in it. The Linds figure comes with sinuses packed with so much coke, you couldn't get anymore up there if you wanted to.

Also, I hate the wax Lindsay, too. I want that Chloe bag.

I still am debating whether I should take the Lindsay Lohan wax statue or the Britney Spears sculpture home.

It's still considered art, right?

Paris looks like she's saying, "Oh no you di-in't!"

#41 - It's not art, it's statutory rape.

A funnier blogger than me came up with that on the Brit thread, but it's still funny.

why did they dress up Paris in sweats? why not one of the really expensive skanky dresses she usually wears. and if they really wanted these statues to be realistic, wouldn't they both have a little nipple showing? or in Paris's case, her whole boob hanging out.

Both likenesses are superb, capturing their vacant, souless gaze and waxey, coke-infused flesh. Together, they stand in the Celebrity Skanks exhibit, sandwiched between the Olsen twins and the Simpson sisters.

UNWASHEDMASSES - NOW YOU'VE GONE TOO FAR! LISA AND MAGGIE ARE NOT SKANKS

I thought the sculpture was going to be her snorting coke on Paris Hilton's Rotten Pussy while Oprah takes a dump on her chest...oh well

Jeezuuuussss...they'll give anyone a wax statue these days.

statutory rape! ahhhhaahhahahhahaha

What will happen when Lindsay's 15 minutes are up? Or for that matter, Paris'? They'll sell them on Ebay, where someone (me) will buy them to use as target practice. Then, when they are reduced to little bits of wax, I'll melt them down, make crayons out of them, and write death threats to the current anorexic media whores.

i want a wax figure in my image. *pouts.
however i dont want to be a bulemic slut who takes it up the ass and shows her snatch to every dickwad with a camera.
life, why art thou so cruel?

That statue looks like Lindsay Lohan crossed with Nicole Richie. I mean, when I look at the face, I see Nicole Richie.

So, how can you tell these are wax figures? They look exactly like the "real" things to me.

Where's the wick at the top to light and melt down this piece of crap giant candle?

Yeeeeeesh....did the people at Madame's House o' Wax purposely make Lohan and Hilton look like they just finished up at a coke-binge black mass orgy?

that's not really paris, since we can't see her vagina. lifelike, my ass!!!

yeah, part of me does wonder if they are anatomically correct... if they could make one of Lindsay from say late 2004, I'd take 2 to go pls... thanks! haha

Wait, I looked at it again and it looks like Nicole Richie... except shes thinner than Lindsey... hey, I was first!!!!

no, Madame Tussaud's did not age her, the living lilo did that herself with cigs, coke, and booze. all that ruins the skin, oh and she tans and she is a freckled pale-face, that will really do a job on the skin.

is that a real chloe bag?

Why are they in the same pose as Avril? Is there a hip condition going around or is assymetrical the new sexy?

And come to think of it, why do they all have the same hairstyle (shared by Ashlee simpson)? WTF they're cloning skanks!

Her statue looks like a 48 year old Bowling Alley Waitress. So all in all they did a pretty good job.

Skanky wax comes from skanky bees.

Uh-uh, folks. It's Jason Bateman in drag!!!

http://www.imdb.com/gallery/ss/0367279/Ss/0367279/6475600_2_41.jpg?path=pgallery&path_key=Bateman,%20Jason

Sadly, after the first glance at the photo, I couldn't tell they weren't real people. Granted, they're not "real" people anyway.

Paris would never wear that. Too much of her is covered up.

Oh, almost forgot--#23 "sometimesboy"--your "waxed fruit" comment was friggin' hilarious!!!

Those things are just creepy. So are those wax figures.

the wicks are hanging out of their vag's.. oh wait, it's just tampon strings, like the chicks at hooters

Lindsay Lohan looks like a praying mantis.

I hate to be a weenie and correct the writers of The Superficial, but those photos are not from Madame Tussauds. The shots are from the opening of Madame Stanks House of Skanks, and that isn't wax...It's 'Man Putty'.

For some reason, I keep thinking of those wax candy lips. Is that what they used on these? They could be edible. Then somebody could actually enjoy eating them.

She looks like Marcia Cross.

I don't think that's a compliment

What a horrible likeness of Lohan. I mean, they even forgot to include her penis. And both of those mannequins are wearing more clothes than Lohan's and Hilton's wardrobes combined.

Paris is wearing too many clothes. If she was half naked it would look more like her.

it looks like kurtwood smith aka Red from that 70's show

http://images.zap2it.com/20050930/kurtwoodsmith_that70sshow_240.jpg

Not that I think Paris is very classy or anything, but I don't think she'd go out looking so ghetto. (she's not above skanky--but she doesn't do ghetto)

Sorry if someone else has pointed this out already, I didn't have time to check.

That shit pisses me off. No seriously, wax sculptures of them is bullshit.

Looks like they used the same nose for Paris and Lindsay. And Lindsay, though not much to look at, doesn't have a Paris Hilton nose.

Looks nothing like her in the cheekbone and nose department, but maybe they took artistic license for the huge amount of coke the statue will have to snort. Or maybe that's where they store the Kate Moss statue.

The boobs should get bigger and smaller, kind of like a beating heart.

I'd hit it!

Does everything look better far away? I mean...really really really far away.. o.o

#82, seriously, if you're that intent on destroying it just light a fire or use a blow torch, takes way less energy... unless of course you're not lazy like me!

I think that's a perfect likeness of me. Paris looks like a whore though.

#79 - I totally agree. I've been to Tussaud's in London England and the stuff there was amazing, well created, and of people of REAL historical relevance. If all they are planning on doing now is making wax sculptures of these bimbos who won't even be remembered in 5 years then they have some serious problems.

Is that MeganHarris & Kim?

87 - RMAOOE

That means Rolling My Ass Off On Extacy

They're missing the most important accessory of all: Dina Lohan's puckered lips permanently affixed to her daughter's ass.

A wax Paris Hilton? That's redundant.

#89 Thanks for clarifying that, hefferzzzzz!
(I would put a smiley face next to that but I hate when people do that too).

92 - you are observant.

I'd like to see the guy that made the Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton wax statues. There is probably a vagina for hot wax sex and no chance of contracting an STD. A win-win situation all around, if you're willing to have sex with a statue.

icky! lindsay is no wonder woman-- - how sweet the popular skank girls get to stand together even in wax world!- is it just me or if you put on a shirley temple wig on Paris and a charlize theron sized bow on her head, paris would be the spitting image of Nancy Oleson (Nelly's cousin) from Little House on the Prairie-- PRAIRIE BITCH! somneone please photoshop that!

They really captured the old harsh well used worn out look of Lindsey.

LiLo's pupils aren't dialated enough; yet the deep creases around her mouth from sucking on a crack stem are all too real!

doesn't Paris' "fake" hair on the wax figure look more genuine than the bird shit she normally sports around on her noggin.
I really think she's bald and wears wigs all the time.

paris hilton's latest fiasco:
http://my.opera.com/bluesman2333/homes/files/old_forum_import/miss-piggie-shows-nipple.jpg

HAHAHA number 85 is a twat! lol

Look how fat Lindsay Looks next to Paris. Come on Lindsay, get to snortin', girl.

Where are Lohan's millions of freckles?!

And why isn't Paris' twat hanging out?!

Aren't these things supposed to be authentic?

I think Lindsay's anatomically incorrect, her hips are wider...wink wink!

Didn't recognize Paris....oh yeah, not shot in night vision. Oh well.

Didn't recognize Paris....oh yeah, not shot in night vision. Oh well.

it's funny that the wax versions look like they have more going on upstairs than the real ones....the real linsday and paris prefer below the waste activity.

wow, does anyone else think they look scary lol

Joan Collin's really looks good for her age.

I love that for all of the couture that they wear and all of the expensive stuff that they flash around, Paris is wearing SWEATPANTS. LL at least got that effen Chloe bag. Ha.

good job but it looks a little older than Linds.. >_<;;

It looks like they took the time to get her eyes perfect. But then they got lazy and just slapped those eyes on a Ben Stiller head they found stuffed in a box somewhere in the storage closet.

It looks like they took the time to get her eyes perfect. But then they got lazy and just slapped those eyes on a Ben Stiller head they found stuffed in a box somewhere in the storage closet.

remember when Paris' wax statue was 'unveiled?' And think Paris was there to pose next to it. Looks like Madame Tussads couldn't afford to fly Linds out, or she passed...Check out their home page, woth seeing! Check out Ben Affleck, you can pose with him like this chick did.

no. 112! Ha, right on!

no. 109, too funny.

how about this; you can marry george clooney
mtvegas.com/experience_chapel.asp

at least Linds was nice enough to stop and pose with the little people.
pugbus.net/artman/publish/04132006_lohanwax.shtml

check out the freaky UK homepage. Do you see the freaky sculpture of kylie monuge?
Is that who that is seriously supposed to be? If I were her I would totally sue. Or just ask them nicely if they would throw the piece of &hit into a tree stump grinder.
madame-tussauds.co.uk/

Shoppen in stijl with J-Lo? Is that seriously dutch? Some drunk/stoned guy in Amsterdam could totally go freak up on her for 100 bucks.
madametussauds.nl/dutch/experience_jlo.asp

no. 108, 104 right on.

108. Posted by HughJorganthethird
Joan Collin's really looks good for her age.

104. Posted by Pez_D_Spencer
Didn't recognize Paris....oh yeah, not shot in night vision. Oh well.

102. Posted by Tania
Where are Lohan's millions of freckles?!
And why isn't Paris' twat hanging out?!
Aren't these things supposed to be authentic?

98. Posted by biatcho
doesn't Paris' "fake" hair on the wax figure look more genuine than the bird shit she normally sports around on her noggin.
I really think she's bald and wears wigs all the time.

23. Posted by sometimesboy
i heard they were going to do a figure of ryan semencrest, but they realized that no one really likes waxed fruit...

----yeah, but he's actually already there, Linds is new. "For a current list of our stars, click here."
mtvegas.com/popup/az.html
mtvegas.com/experience_az.asp#

You can totally have your own party with all your favorite celebs there! There's hundres of more than 100 of the world's hottest celebrities, politicians, athletes and legends are in attendance for your function. Featuring six highly themed rooms ranging from a Hollywood party with guests including Julia Roberts and Brad Pitt to an exciting sports arena with interactive experiences featuring Shaquille O'Neal and Tiger Woods, your guests are encouraged to touch, interact and be photographed with the lifelike figures.
http://www.mtvegas.com/parties.asp

oh, crap. I didn't realize they allowed us to type links. Crap. Sorry. :)

#113, 114, 115, 116

Dude. Lay off the VAULT. It's not intended for nighttime use.

...yeah i know, that waxed man-face wacked on Lohen reminds me of u too biatchole!

muhahahahahahah!!!! BIATCHO, you're 31!LOL! Dude, enough said! I give up, you win whatever, because you are OLD!!LOL! I CANNOT compete with that shit! Whatever you say to me now, I'll just be laughing at! No really, you win!!hahaha!Best.Site.Ever!

One little,
Two little,
Three little anorexic chicks;
Four little,
Five little,
Six little anorexic chicks;
Seven little
Eight little
Nine little anorexic chicks...
Ten anorexic stupid whores!

Wow I'd really appreciate it more if these were the work of that Psycho from "HOUSE OF WAX". :P

Hope they didn't forget the herpes on Paris..

WHAT THE???!?!?!? Is it just me or is that a bad wax job? Is that? a mustache? Lindsay Looks like A MEN!!!

Heffer - you're killing me!! While I had a weekend full of fun & debauchery you seriously posted on the superficial about a crazillion times. You're a fucking loser! When I was a teenager I had friends & went boozing & smoking pot at the marina every fucking night... do you even have friends?
It's actually quite sad so perhaps I will stop telling everyone you suck moosecock because now you're just like a retard to me - I feel bad for making fun. Tell your parents I'm sorry too. They are probably in their bedroom smoking pot right now and kicking themselves for raising a loser.

#124 the wax Lohan looks ugly because Lindsay Lohan IS UGLY!!!!!!
I wonder if wax Lohan's ass is flat and hangs badly as a 70 year old lady's too as real Hohan's ass does.

Does wax Paris has wax herpes???

Does wax Hohan has wax cocaine in her purse?

what a fucking ugly thing and a waste of good wax! Will there be a sex tape from her as well?

She does it right. The best kind of shoes are no shoes at all. Besides, her feet still look more or less healthy - why ruin that with shoes?