Apr 5 2006Julia Roberts looks interesting

OMG I need to go back to my happy place!

She is not ready for her close up, Mr. DeMille.

The reason you haven't noticed that huge schnozz before is because you've ever been drawn to her enormous horse-mouth. Somehow, the photographer managed to get a non-slack-jawed picture of Julia Roberts.

I've never seen Howard Stern without his glasses.

Fifth Post! Ok, got that out of my system. However, I will add a comment this time.
#2, lmao with your comment. Yeah, what happened to her? She looks better as a redhead like Lindsey Lohan. If it ain't broke, don't fix it!

Never having been a big JR fan, I can say that her schnaze is second only to those giant chicklets she calls teeth.

Eye of newt, anyone?

And what's with that caterpillar over her eye? Jesus, Julia -- TWEEZERS.

Looks like she's wearing Magnum P.I.'s moustache as a forehead accessory. They're all the rage in Hollywood.

Right at this moment, that camera guy who left his wife for this creature is realising what a huuuuuge mistake he made.

enjoy your hag sir.

#4, hahahahahahahaha!! That was good.

"I've seen that crappy Julia Roberts movie forty-seven times. Have you seen the lips on that woman? Like a baboon's ass on her face."
- Lois, Family Guy

I've always thought she was weird and rodent-looking. Not quite as rodent-esque as Jennifer Love Hewit, but a close second.

Julia's first acting job was with her nose in the role of the K-12 mountain in John Cusack's classic: "Better Off Dead"

That sure is a Pretty Woman! Seriously, the sea hag ain't aging well. She needs to start bathing in the blood of virgins. Works for Sharon Stone.

i'm glad to see the superficial getting in the spirit of the kentucky derby, as it is only a month away...thanks for this pic of the odds on favorite...she's sure to win or at the very least place...i can just see jockey pat day mounting her...

And your little dog too.....

In other news, Garth Brooks' ex-wife, Sandy, was briefly kidnapped.

I would say something mean, but to me she looks exactly the same in this picture as she'always looked, just older. So the only thing I can really say here is, "I told you so".

P.S. HAVE YOU GUYS TRIED THIS NEW VAULT SODA??? THIS SHIT IS OF THE CHAIN!!! I LOVE YOU GUYS!!!!!!!!!!OMG LOL LOL LMAO NMH LOLOLOPPLOLOLOLOL POPOZAOAOOOSOOOOOOKLNSDKJVN ZDBFBGF7U776RFI7II...............L;KL

I mean to say "off" the chain. Please excuse my typographical error.

#15 - And your little dog too.....

lmao

the nose :O

well done italian stallion...

She looks so...

ordinary.

Can't stand this bitch. Not only does she have a big, oddly shaped schnoz, a huge, horse mouth, and monkey ears, but she's a shitheel to boot. Her brother Eric, who's a far better actor, got Julia her start in the biz. When his career stalled while hers was skyrocketing, did she lend a hand to her bro? Help him with a role here or there? Nope. Supposedly nasty to personal assistants, also (then again, PAs aren't people - right?). Bottomline, Julia's a media fabrication - just like Kate Moss and J-Lo. They ain't hot, no matter what Us, People, or Entertainment Weekly tells us.

i think she looks fine! I think she just came out of doing her show on broadway... plus she has to go home and take care of twins...

i think she looks awesome

NOUN:
pl. ostrich or os·trich·es

n. large, swift-running flightless bird (Struthio camelus) of Africa, characterized by a long bare neck, small head, and two-toed feet. It is the largest living bird.

Wikipedia much, Mr. HotNutz?

I'd put my money on her to win the Kentucky Derby.

Only when I don't know too much about what I'm talking about.

So basically, all day, every day.

By the way, you have been fucking hilarious lately! Keep rockin' in the free world.

I have my VAULT ENERGY DRINK to thank for my newfound hilarity. It kicks like a soda and stings like a pitchfork or something like that... uhhhhhh, I think I'm burning out... someone get me lightbulb full of meth before I pass out at my desk...

oshkosh- Are you becoming a NASCAR driver? What's up with the product placement? Wait a second, I'll have to get back with you. My new MOTOROLA CELL PHONE is ringing. I got a great deal deal through CINGULAR WIRELESS. My new CHEVY TAHOE with SIRIUS SATELLITE RADIO got me safely to the store to purchase it.

Dude, you're so getting in trouble for those promotional comments.

Last time I saw a mouth like that, it had a hook in it.

Nick Nolte hates her. He said she was the most high maintenance bitch he has ever worked with. This is some feat considering he did 'Blue Chips' with Shaq.

Dam she looks huffed out. She looks like she was sniffing paint with a rag. Happy camper gal you.

with a beak like that, i'll bet she can catch fish midflight.

Kudos to #15. When I saw this picture up on the wall at the local Munchkin Post Office - I wasn't taking it too seriously. Tanx for the 'heads-up.'

High Ho Julia away!!

Ok, numero 18... Holy cow, I just drooled my coffee all over my keyboard I was laughing so hard. Thank you.

Can somebody follow the breadcrumbs to her house I am pretty sure you will find her kids cooking away in the oven.

Ok, I'm no fan of Julia's, BUT her nose is NOT huge and is actually quite refined looking. In fact, plastic surgeons say her nose is frequently requested by patients. It is really cute from the side, so bugger off.

That said, she is a major biatch and I think Danny is going to dump her butt some day. Who can forget her t-shirt "A-low Vera"
as a jab to the pregnant wife of the man she stole? You can't get much biatchier than that. The fact that she's on Broadway now instead of retiring to be with her twins shows the size of this woman's ego. She needs to go back to the ranch asap.

the fact that she wants to work now that her kids are a few years old shows the size of her ego? i am sorry what year were you born in? is this 1956 instead of 2006? that was the most retarded comment ever.

she may be a bitch, but it has nothing to do with her wanting to work while she has kids you loser.

also, she was amazing in erin brockovich. not in much else though.

Are you sure that isn't the love child of Lilli Taylor and Sarah Jessica Parker? Man Pretty Woman was a LONG time ago.

yeah, her tits WERE pretty amazing in erin brockovich.

"Ok, I'm no fan of Julia's, BUT her nose is NOT huge..."

Dye her hair blonde, pump her with steroids adn call her Triple H.

on the other hand, i still love richard gere.

Fun Fact: The Byrds' "Eight Miles High" was written about JR's forehead.

(They also wrote one about her pointy, pointy chin, called "Get That Thing Out My Eye" but it never charted.)

almost 50 comments and no "I'd hit it".

come on guys, does she look that bad?

#24 - Julia rejected her brother because her brother Eric is a total shithead deadbeat dad.

Years ago, Eric kicked his wife Kelly and small daughter Emma out onto the street (apparently after knocking Kelly around). Julia severed any relationship with Eric because of this.

Julia stepped up to help Kelly and Emma. She bought them a house, then later helped Kelly get full custody of Emma. Julia LOVES her niece and is very close to her.

Julia also has been instrumental in helping Emma's career. (Emma played Depp's daughter in "Blow".)

I'm no huge fan of Julia's, but Eric is a total asshole, and I'm personally ecstatic that he's reduced to doing pathetic music videos.

@30 and 31

My husband is also a huge fan of VAULT ENERGY DRINK. He says it drinks like a soda, but kicks like crystal meth. It gives him the energy needed to clean all of our woodwork with PLEDGE WOOD CLEANER, then when he crashes, he settles down with his SUNBEAM ELECTRIC BLANKET and a TUPPERWARE bowl to catch his puke. I, on the other hand, prefer BARQS ROOT BEER. It has bite.

Nothing like cleaning the old woodwork when you're strung out and tweekin'. That and making scrapbooks of all the time you've spent writing posts for the Superficial. Long as I got my Vault, my lightbulb, and my 8-ball, I'll be going through a lot of cardboard paper and paste.

Two words: Marilyn Manson

Haggard.

@51 Yummy. Paste is good. Especially if it's the kind with the little orange stick that's so handy for spreading.

Oh yeah, i'd hit it. With a metal pipe...

many, many times.

She looks like she just crawled out of Tom Cruise' ass.

56 posts and no JR lovers to defend her inner beauty and how this is just a bad angle, lighting, zoom lens distortion, etc. photo?

Witch!

The best JR was Ashton K on SNL doing her with the twins and the horsehead laugh.

GAH! JR TOTALLY POKED MY EYES OUT! CAN'T SEE! Thank goodness I can type without looking :)

With that nose, she should have the strongest neck in show business.

Her nose is so big, she can actually smell the color yellow.

ya, what # 17 said....

She could probably slice vegatables with that nose.

I'd hit her, with a 2x4 right smack in the middle of the bitch's face.

It’s fun to write about bitches I hate.

An apple my pretty?

Please no more close-ups of Julia Roberts, a little puke came up in my mouth...UGH!

If she could sing, she would be in "Wicked."

she totally looks like alanis morrisette, that kind of fug...

anybody notice something strange about her forehead? how could she be smiling without her forehead moving?
it's funny how she has HUGE crow's feet but nary a forehead blemish, not even between the eyes.....
BOTOX! BOTOX! BOTOX!

she is such an idiot! botox is for close-ups! the nature of live theatre REQUIRES lots of large facial expressions. people in the back row need to see you act too.
she's an idiot in that now she won't even be able to move her eyebrows. basically she will only be able to smile, which, coincidentally, is her only skill.
i'm not sure what the play's about, but my guess is that it depicts her trying on many whimsical hats.

#65-and she would give the makeup girl a break cause she's ready to go on stage.

people have always said they loved Julia Roberts, but I have never seen it. Sandra Bullock is infinitely hotter than JR. Why cast Julia when you could have Sandy? Why cast Julia at all?

For a second there I felt a little bit bad about ripping on celebrities. But the moment passed.

I hate this bitch! Julia sucks.

her image consultant MUST be a millionaire, because she somehow kept her "courtship" with a married expectant father under the public radar.
can you imagine how vera felt? pregnant, and then finding out that your husband is cheating w/ JULIA F_ING ROBERTS?!!! how do you compete with that? and then julia taunts her through the paparazzi?
julia is a C*NT!

#16 In Other News: Eminem (crazy) and his ex-wife/wife (crazier) are getting divorced AGAIN. Now, WHY has it taken this long for a public outcry of "God! That Woman is UGLY"?!?! I have pondered her "appeal" to the masses for many a year. It's about time

Old MacDonald had a farm EIEIO
And on that farm he had a dog EIEIO
With a ruff ruff here and a ruff ruff there
Here a ruff there a ruff everywhere a ruff ruff

That's a whole lot of ugly. Never saw her alleged talent either...I avoid her.

#14 and #28

I am putting my money for Julia to compete in the Derby, Dakota Fanning for the lead but Hilary Swank for the win.

She's always had that nose... and a lot of teeth. She's got like 42 teeth, man!

#70, his first wife was pregnant? What happened to the baby?

i never thought she was hot...pirana mouth.

hey, I knew her when her ears stuck out like car doors. come to think of it, they still stick out, she just uses cellotape to pin 'em back. I dunno that nose looks pretty Photoshop to me.

Horserace, hell. This woman could win a jousting match.

har har she goes!!!

Her nose has always been big, its just the camera abgle that the photo has been taken on that makes it look absolutely massive

I meant 'angle' not 'abgle'

Why the long face, Julia?

Maybe I got an apple for ya...

a horse is a horse, of course of course!

I love that line by Lois about the baboon's ass. I wholeheartedly agree with the sentiment expressed too. I think Roberts is the second greatest con job Hollywood has ever perpertrated on the unwitting public. I'll leave you to figure out what number one is.

Lol oh my gawd! Im sensing an awful lot of jealousy here!

im guessing the fact that millions of men around the planet facy this woman leaves you ladies a little bitter?

god leave her alone, so what if her nose looks big, shes stunning!

are you all trying to tell me that you,ve never looked bad on a photo? (in fact im guessing many of you have looked an awful lot worse!)

so stop with the harsh comments....its people like you lot that make other people paranoid about ourselves

tut tut *wags finger*

its really quite small of you all....