Apr 28 2006Gwen Stefani is really pregnant

FIRST??

First again!!

Why is everyone pregnant?

YAY!! And second!!

Damn! Holly beat me! Sucks..

Ohhhh... I would have been first, but I had to sign in!!!

Why does she have Karl Malden's nose?

I thought this was the homeless chick whos always bugging me for change or offering blowjobs for cheeseburgers.

Damn those bag-lady blows.

She wears the stupidest things and looks adorable!!! Ugh!

gross...pregnant women really should not be allowed to go out in public during the third trimester. yuck

Becos she's pregnant I'll do her doggystyle....which sort of reminds me that Tom Cruise loves da dick.

She has been wearing that same shade of lipstick since 1995. Maybe it's time for a change, especially since red is so passe. What does Gavin SEE in her, he can do so much better, especially now since she's become a wigger with those long fake talons, tons of gold jewelry, and that terrible crap music. Go away new, unimproved Gwen, bring back the punk/pop/ska rocker chick! I can only imagine the horrendous name she's got all picked out for this kid...Boomqueshia, Questacia, J'Qon, Fonte, LaFawnduh...

how come celebrities think that being pregant is a license to dress like a bag lady?

Wow, she has really undergone a metamorphosis just like the rest of us do !!!

She's not pregnant. She just swallowed on of my Land-Shots.

Aww...I used to love Gwen...I still kinda do but wtf happened? Not diggin the whole wannabe gangsta thing...and annoying banana songs.

I hope she gets back in shape after she has the baby.... she had awesome abs...

#3

When a man and a woman love one another, sometimes they lie very close to one another and kiss. Then the man gently removes the womans shirt, and looks longingly into her eyes. Then they kiss some more, and then the man tells lies to the woman until she takes off all of her clothes. Then he gently, lovingly licks the woman between her legs. At that point the woman moans softly. This is a sign for the man to finish unbuttoning his pants , and without removing his tongue from said vagina, turn upside down and drop his balls in her mouth. this is sometimes called tea-bagging. When the man has had enough tea bagging , he bend the woman over the bed, and slowly enters her anus...shit, I meant vagina. He then thrusts repeatedly in rhythm with the woman. Sometimes he ejaculates (this is when semen spurts from the penis) in the vagina, and this causes babies. That is why a man should always jam it up her anus or in her mouth right before ejaculating.
Seriously folks, use condoms, the diseases you kids have today will KILL you!

Oh, sometimes men do the same thing, substitute "hairy rectum" where the word "vagina" is and you will see what I mean.

No really, why is everyone pregnant? Are the spawns of celebrities going to take over the universe? There'll be Suri, from planet whatever, Brangies kid from Namimimimbia, Brooke shields' kid from, oh wait, no one cares about that one. Theyre gonna try and convert us into African Scientologist aliens.

P.S. TCLTC

I read that -

If it's a girl, they're going with Starla or Darla.

If it's a boy, Farmer.

#18 Ok. I think I get it... but then the baby grows in the rectum? Or did I miss something.

AND her husband is an unemployed robot..

Her husband is cool. Admit it -- we all bought that Bush album because it was actually good.

Her husband is G-A-Y. He fucked his way into a recording contract in the UK, was a hustler in Manchester for a while...

NO I missed it again!

She looks like a hobo

don't forget tcltc

# 18 Gross.
I think that Lego porn from the 'Kate' thread is a lot tidier - AND! - it entertains the kids.
At least being preggo didn't effect her fashion sense...well maybe a bit...

WTF is up with the idiots who post "FIRST" in every single f-in thread? Who cares? Does anyone care? I thought you had to be at least 13 to post comments here. Go to school.

Awful outfit. She's still hot, though.

#18 obviously writes "moist reading" in his/her spare time. and most definitely reads it in the crapper.

#27
It's school vacation week, that is why there has been a drop in posting IQ

(I've got a weird McDonald's ad at the top. You pass your mouse over the friggin' 'salad' and the ingredients turn, like radio-active. Is this some sort of Chernobyl memorial ?
Or do people eat the stuff ?)

I'm all about the ass-busting...

In keeping with the music theme -- if anyone's interested, you can download an mp3 of Chris Daughtry's performance from American Idol this week:

http://www.pretendpundit.com/2006/04/download_chris.html

For the love of god, the woman is huge. On some women, being preggers is quite becoming, they look radiant(see Angelina)On Gwen, hmmm..not so much (see Britney).

Gross.

My penis is crying.

Posting IQ, on the superficial comment section? HAHAHAHAHHA!!!

First!!!!!! Fuck you!

It's her face, she gained weight in her face! Creepy! I think maybe 3rd trimester is the time to throw away the "Hot Tamale" shade of lipstick...

#34For the love of god, the woman is huge. On some women, being preggers is quite becoming, they look radiant(see Angelina)On Gwen, hmmm..not so much (see Britney).

From most of the pics I've seen, Gwen does look radiant.. more so than Katie, Britney and Angelina. Given Angelina hops skips and jumps from continent to continent and is usually photographed with her face down, I'd say Gwen's the best looking.
Paltrow looked more radiant than Jolie for Godsake.

Of course you could be right, however Angelina looks very well for a woman that travels so much in her state (or may be she photographs better?)

Gwen does not look very nice in this pictures, and this is the superficial. It is our sworn duty to slam these people for being the least bit human.

Dig the hat...otherwise, I'm bored of her. When she having the baby again? YES, time for a change in lipstick color, she must have a thousand lipsticks the same exact shade!

In my greatest dreams, I am MeganHarris. I have the most wonderful life, I can sit & wait for new stories to appear so I can be first, second. Thanks Meg for being my idol. XOXO

Huh. I didn't know Gwen was a Rastafarian.

I think I saw this girl at one of the Dead shows (don't ask me which).
She was selling grilled cheeses for $1, gooballs for $5 and had a contributions jar so the bus could get repaired in time for the next show.
I love you, Earth Mother.

She looks like that ugly woman with the red lipstick from that movie "Cry Baby" with Johnny Depp

I always thought Gwen is hot as shit, there is something really sexy about her.....
I have to say though, and I understand that she's pregnant, but this picture is horrible. I don't think I'm gonna look at it anymore so I can always remember her the way I like to. Sitting on my face.

I hope her boobs stay that way, but I'm more of an assman myself anyway, on a women of course..........

@44
hatchet face is looking great next to this broad.

hahahahahahaha, Stallion you sure have a way with words.

on my face, GOLD!!

Totally off the subject but these new Jetta commercials are so racial. The car is hit on whichever side the negro is on. I'm just saying.

Uh...since when did Gwen Stefani morph into a Circus Clown... ?

lol @ 48...WTH??

Again, still not as fat as Edna. I just hope she doesn't go all Britney on us and turn into a cheezy scarfing, trailer park ho that doesn't lose the preggo weight.

Ha the superficial guy's got it on this one... penguin+joker+rastafarian=see above

But I still bet she's hot.
Me+gwen+the road warrior=scha-wing

and maybe + italian stallion for saying "sitting on my face"

What about my balls will they stand their ground
Will they let you down yeah, yeah
What about my balls are they gonna be low down
Will they ever be around or will they turn their backs on you.

No they won't, baby. These Land-Balls were made for swingin', from side to side and back to front. Right, left, back to the left.

Once you go Land, you never go back.

TaftHarley

You only get rectum babies from scientologsists.

*looks longingly towards Sodomy_is_for_girls* *flinches, wonders what gender sifg is* Damn faceless internet!

Jesus H. Christ on a pogo stick, that albino hair and dark lipstick look is dated and makes her look older than she is. Not as beautiful preggo as Angelina is. Looks like a doofus in that knit hat. What does Gavin see in her?

Land-bitch, you could see your genitalia even with an electron microscope, you fake-assed mother fucker.

I used to think she was reasonably hot, ... now she scares my penis.

A bit off topic, but Gavin, and his fucking band Bush, are gay posers. Apparently, Tom Cruise isn't the only one who loves the cock ;^)

just because you're pregnant, doesn't give you the right NOT to match your clothes!

and that hat is hideous, wtf isn't she suppose to be a designer?

well most designs design ugly ass clothes nowadays.. so i guess it's fitting

I didn't realize Cirque du Soleil was in town. I wonder if she's unwittingly poisoning her baby with all the make up she slathers on.

SIXTY-FIRST!

EAT IT, SUCKERS!

I am reporting all disgusting posts.

@54........dry land is all I see....that's it.....parched......totally........nothin but a mirage of a BigJim in the distance....

@57.....oh...I thought you said an "erection" microscope.....wheew...too much cheap mexican & margaritas!

Edna, put down the oreos and get out of the house more. You're not accompishing anything by trying to clean up and christianize the internet. Not everyone suscribes to your sham religion.

And damn gwen is fucking ugly.

I am reporting anyone who reports disgusting posts...

#65 You are REPORTED!

OK Edna, fake edna, real edna, no-life edna, whatever...it seems obvious after a week of failed attempts that you will never rid the internet of filth and disgust. That's what this site is all about anyway, filthy and disgusting celebs and people with no life who like to sit around and comment on filthy and disgusting celebs. You're efforts have failed. You are an official failure at life, so go away. You are not fun anymore, now you are just boring, like this site has become.

@67 - **ASS** - and you can quote me on that - in my BEST nasal Great Lakes accent....

SEVENTY!! SEVENTY! bitches!! SEVENTY!!! eat me

It took Edna a few minutes to reply to #65 because she had her pentecostal pursed old-lady lips wrapped about Freddy Fender's hairy left scrote. I

holly, how did you become such a dumbass? we're all proud that you can count to 70, but you really need to shut the fuck up now.

Edna wishes she had a time machine so she could trip back about 2000 years and suck off Jeezuuz himself.

Gives whole new meaning to the term "Jesus Juice."

Hey, did I just burn Edna, Christianity, and Michael Jackson all in one post? I rock!

Geminiwhateverthefuck:

I've decided that you are a cuntrag and need to die soon. So get on it.

Someone is hiding a bad hair day!

I've decided that I quit caring what you decided a long time ago, slimjim

@72 - you ROCK!!!! It's a triple header!!

I think it's hilarious that someone who's identity is based on her horoscope calls other people dumbass. HA!! I especially like that exceptionally creative lower-then-UPPER case thing you have goin' on. You're obviously a Rhodes Scholar.

SEVENTY-FIVE BITCH!!

FIRST!!

and @ 48 - LOL!

proof that you can't count afterall, i guess.

fRoM NOw oN I tHiNk wE SHouLd aLL tYpE LikE tHis

iTs jUSt sOoo cUteSy-wUteSY-piE

ONE HUNDRED FORTY TWO !!!

Hey, where's Edna? Has she been banned into oblivion (I hope)? #72 lol

20: Good God, I hope not - names like that clearly limit the kid's employment opportunities:

Starla - truck stop waitress somewhere along I-40 in Oklahoma.

Darla - Dairy Queen manager in Macon, Georgia.

Farmer - fluffer, alternate-lifestyle cinema, San Fernando Valley, CA.

and
Tom - you love cock

(PS Cube - What's a "fluffer?")

haha cuntrag

superficial has generated all of my favorite insults since "fucktard", but that one's gonna be hard to beat.

hard...beat...hahahahahaha
I crack meself up and turn meself on at the same time

She looks pretty cute in the last pick... and... What's with the random numbers...?

FIVE HUNDRED SIXTY FIVE! FUCKTARD!

I hereby pass sentence on GeminiJillian, death by Land-Man's 18mm cock.

Things must be pretty damn slow for Superficial to have to insult pregnant women on an almost daily basis. Yes she is big. So is Katie Holmes. So is Angelina Jolie. So is every f***ing woman when she is about to deliver. Good for you for pointing it out. Again.

A fluffer is someone who goes down on a pornstar between takes to keep them hard/wet.

Posted by Land-Man on April 28, 2006 07:30PM

No they won't, baby. These Land-Balls were made for swingin', from side to side and back to front. Right, left, back to the left.

that just reminded me of the movie 'kids' when that one guy is swinging his dick around and making that slapping noise and he keeps doing it over and over. its kinda funny but mostly gross lol

I JERKED OFF IN A LIBTURDS SALAD TODAY!

i thought it was "libtard" with an "a"

Libtard and libturd are not words. Fuck, that is the second time that fucker made me use non-words in a sentence. Bastard.

But seriously, if you are trying to make a new word, the least you could do is be consistent. Stronzo.

oh relax people. you wouldn't try to look like hot shit if you had a fucking human being inside an organ that was originally the size of your fist, also knowing that eventually you were going to have to pop a watermelon out of a pinhole. the fact that she even considered putting make up on merits kudos.

I'M GONNA EAT HER PLACENTA!!!!!111 one

THAT PLACENTA TASTES LIKE BANANAS! B A N A N A S!

Whatever happened to PapaHotNuts?

I feel like she's been pregnant for 35 months now......

@87 Cube .. ACK!! Are you serious? They need that? Aren't they surrounded by pulsating genitals? Who the hell needs stimulation when they're constantly buried under a sea of inflammed holes and poles???

@94 Yeah, Hara, I miss Papahotnuts too.

(^Those two comments are completely unrelated.)

Land-Man and ItalianStallion

i heart you

fools! you are all missing the bigger picture here! and that is:

gwen stefani loves the cock.

missed you, edna fatchick. muah!

Is that Carol Kane dressed like a pregnant hippy?

How the hell is she that pregnant and still completely lacking in boobage?

@22--a greasy, kinda dirty unemployed robot

@12--she's not a wigger, she's a chola (i think that's the word), a female Mexican gangbanger.

@53--i think i might love you. You sure are funny as hell, but in another post why did you refer to your landcock as a she??

@62--I'd be worried for anyone you reported except you only report people who insult you. I don't think the FBI or whoever you're crying to gives a flying fuck if someone's picking on you. We won't go to prison for calling a fat whore. One day soon I hope you get a sense of humor.

@72--yes, you do rock. Jesus juice. hahaha

If you think Gwen looks so bad, why don't you get off your ass and become her stylist? Stop your freakin complaining people, I don't think anyone truly gives a rats ass

Oh we are not complaining, mr. "jeirnandes", we are just making fun of the stefani creature, we don't really give a rat's ass about her.

@102 - Become her stylist? Oh right. First off, I am a heterosexual male, not British. We're not known for being great stylists.

Second, I hope that is your real name because if you chose your nick after an actor that gives Paul Walker a run for his money in shitty acting, you are dumber than a post, namely yours.

Third, in case you haven't noticed, this site is about truth. The truth is, Gwen looks like a circus clown.

Fourth, I think you might be Tom Cruise, because he loves the cock. I'll let you complete the thought there.

I'm still sitting here wondering why Gwen Stefani is transforming into someting you'd see airbrushed on a Mexican's t-shirt.

#48

That's because no one likes darkies.

Honestly.

I suspect Papahotn*ts account was suspended due to me reporting or even better, Homeland Security has paid a visit to his home. Let this be a warning to others, keep it clean. I am reporting all disgusting posts!

Edna, I just talked to Mr. Nuts. He's on a mission in Rio to convert the women of the night who wander the street God-less and and unclean, to show them the light of Jesus Christ so that they may not be lost, and change their evil ways.
Well actually he's in Rio giving it missionary to some unclean and God-less hookers to show them his dick so that they may suck it and not spit.
But anyway, you know how hard it is to get an internet connection down there.

#42
She's not a Rasta. pimping the colors is one of her many gimmicks. She's done it from the beginning. similar to Madonna,Gwen "borrows" from other cultures (ie: reggae, L.A.M.B.) to appear hip, and bring that "next shit" to the mainstream (AKA white America).

you can tell in that picture how she will look when she is 80

If Edna got Mr Hotnuts banned he wouldnt be the only one missing

Gwen Stefani managed to run the gamut from dull to tedious in just over ten years. All without taking a bath.

#107 Meet your sponsor at Denny's ASAP, and get your Haldol scrip refilled. And I feel the pedantic need to point out that the DHS doesn't send *anyone* to people's houses, as that isn't its function. So the "agent" you've been meeting with at the Starlite Bar whose been having you write "reports" for him on cocktail napkins is probably just some pervert who likes to rape fat chicks. Keep your pepper spray handy.

Dr, still my hero

#94:

Who needs PapaHotNuts when you've got BigJim. I'm almost as funny and way better looking.

Seriously, though, I miss the guy too. He was like a father to me. Like a father who used to sneak into my room at night and make me promise not to tell mommy the things he made me do.

#83:

Wish I could take credit for "cuntrag" but I'm afraid I stole if from someone (biatcho, I think). It was in reference to Edna, which I think is an unfair term for her. Edna, in my opinion, is not in fact a cuntrag.

She's just fat. A big fat fatty who likes to commune with her crucifix while imagining everyone who's not a King James Bible scholar writhing in the fiery pits of the deepest levels of hell. That's the Edna we know and love (but not in THAT way).

Use of the term 'fatty' is hereby banned for sounding too British. No arguments or objections will be accepted. There will be no warning and no appeals.
Signed,
The Management

@99 ha ha, you are right. I was thinking maybe a rasta Wicked Witch of the West, but I think the Addams Family might be closer. After all, she is alarmingly pale, not green. Add a couple of warts and she's got the role in the next Addams Family sequel. Damn, get some sun, girl! And those red lips are scary. Somebody needs to take her crayons away.

I've been wondering for a couple years if Gwen has her lipstick tattoed on. Any info on this? If you start looking (and I have been for a LONG time) you will notice that there is no recent photo of her ever, in any situation, without the red lipstick on. Either she can't freaking relax and leave the house without it, or girlfriend's stuff is permanent.

Believe you me, she is gonna loose those acrylic nails once the baby is born. She won't be able to change any diapers with those talons glued on.

See, I was told by someone who has been around here that she is FUG without makeup.
This kinda proves it.
Good luck with the baby, best wishes, however.

116 i always associate "fatty" with herbal remedies. maybe that will help.

Osh: If you really wanna sound British, you need to apologize profusely and for no apparent reason E.g. "Terribly sorry but you're a fatty."

BigJim;

You're right, you are not as funny as Mr. Nut.....BURN! You are pretty darn funny, though. Other current favs are osh, biatcho,mamacita, Dr. Roktor, barbadoslim, cancer nipples, and, well, Landman. He used to drive me crazy, but he does one thing, does it well, and is just bright enough to not delve past his level. I hate white people who try to be Jamaican. The area I live is loaded with rich white kids, with dreads, driving beemers and talking about Bob Marley. We call them trustafarians (get it, trust funds!) Although in honour of the Superfish and it's legion of posters I will start the trend in my town of calling them....CuntRags!
Shit, my funny bone is broken. This post is lame. Totally unlike all my other radical posts to date. *puts gun in mouth*

#123, REPORTED!

JUST GOT MY SATURN ION !!!
#1 in every crash tezt Boizz!!!

I was the firzt in my neighborhood to getz me one!!

It kickz da azz of every other car on da street with itz 98hp 4 stroke up front....no doubt!!!

70 MPGZ highway/ 68 MPGZ city - WITH PLENTY TO SPARE!!

4X4 on the floor & lookin for more !!

It’z a real chick magnet !!!!

Saturn - #1 in performance & style

OK... Check it!!............
http://www.consumptionjunction.com/content/detail.asp?ID=52447

God damn you, my_saturn_kicks_azz. I really never wanted to see that picture ever again.

Does anyone else think that Skilling is hot? I want to lay Ken Lay...in his G wagon!

Excuse me Ms. Bambrick;

Was this about who I thought was funny or are you offended by Bob Marley? Oh, had to be CuntRags, my bad. You don't think someone pretending to be something they are not is a bit weird, and CuntRag worthy? Please stick something prickly in every orifice, starting with your mouth.
Oh and 125 DAMN!!!! Got me good with that one, I fucking almost threw up....AGAIN! Keep it up!
rori- I feel your pain, brutha...or sissa!

This is the yahoo profile for Edna Bambrick.

http://profiles.yahoo.com/ednabambrick

Did you guys already find this? I get tired of reading hundreds of posts, so it's very likely that you already know about it. Anyway, she looks EXACTLY how I pictured her.

I forgot to suggest googling her. It's interesting. She's all over the internet with her bible thumping.

Edna, how do you have so much time and who exactly are you reporting to? I sure hope Homeland Security has better things to do (maybe like catch terrorists?) than go visit the houses of those who post in gossip forums. Are you retarded or just bored?

claims her site is Jesus is the lord.com? I can't believe that when she claims there that TV and what 'belongs to the world' is against Jesus, she uses so easily the Internet.

By using the Internet I hope to save all of you sinners. I pray for you all every night.

After you google me, google Jesus and read his message and let Him save you.

I am neither retarded or bored. I'm on a mission to save all of the sinners and save the innocent who need to read this filth on the Internet. I pray for you all. Working for the Lord is never boring nor retarded.

A Haiku dedication:

Edna the dugong
Wide-eyed pod person
We all want to hurl

Meet me, Jesus, meet me. Meet me in the middle of the air
If my wings should fail me, Lord. Please meet me with another pair
...so I can die easy
Jesus gonna make up... my dyin' bed

Oh, Saint Peter, at the gates of heaven... Won't you let me in
I never did no harm. I never did no wrong

Oh, Gabriel, let me blow your horn. Let me blow your horn
Oh, I never did, did no harm.

I've only been this young once. I never thought I'd do anybody no wrong
No, not once.

Oh, I did somebody some good. Somebody some good...
Oh, did somebody some good. I must have did somebody some good...

I love Gwen and I think she looks so cute. That first pic is just the weird lighting effect of the bright sun and shadow. She is soo freakin cute!

Dear poor sad pathetic Edna Bambrick...why don't you do something really worthwhile with your time if you care so much about saving people? What makes you think coming on this site and being a nuisance is going to save anyone?? Sadly I think its clear to everyone that you are insane and the only thing you are accomplishing is getting people to make fun of you. YOU are seriously misguided. Do you really think if Jesus where alive that he would spend his time reading thesuperficial and threatening people here? Its also very clear that you are a closet freak and get off on reading all this 'nasty' comments. Why don't you go save yourself. GOD YOU ARE SO ANNOYING. Plus I saw those posts you wrote about how you love the cock, what the F??

OKAY NOW you want to blow gabriel too!!

This is my real yahoo profile http://profiles.yahoo.com/edna_bambrick

I believe everyone should be able to post, they shouldn't be able to post disgusting posts. I am reporting all disgusting posts! 26 reported already.

seriously Edna, now I feel bad for you. Please tell me why or how you think your approach is going to save anyone??

I am cleaning up the internet, reporting all disgusting posts. If I can help someone find Jesus Christ as their savior, then I have done His work.

But I read those comments you made about loving cock, really seriously. So whats up with that?

Someone is ruining my good name, probably this website. They have banned me many times since I shut them down last weekend.

whatever, it was you. And what makes you think you have a good name?

Not around here. Threatening people is not a way to make friends. It’s not a way to 'save' anyone. What you are trying to do is against our constitutional rights. Now I question your sincerity, lying is a sin, isn't it?

Seriously, I think you would have more luck in Afghanistan or some other extremely oppressive and fascist controlled place. Maybe you ought to go there.

#144, Keep it clean, I'm reporting all posts. I will be back after church tomorrow.

reporting to who??

WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I AM AFRAID OF YOU??

you are trolling around here for cock, I READ YOUR POSTS I KNOW IT WAS YOU.

I HAVE REPORTED YOU.

Actually, before I go, fuck you.

thanks Edna, I knew Id get the real you to come out.

ps youre pretty cute in that pic =)

So did you take kw as a name because ky, you favorite jelly for lubing the entryway, was already taken?

#147 You are REPORTED!

#150, you are REPORTED!!

This is blasphemy! I do not use such language! Lord, please forgive this lost soul, he knows not what his does, Amen.

Why am I talking to myself? Oh no, forgot to take my meds!!

YOU ARE NOT ME! REPORTED!

Two posts at the same time. Demons are lurking the Internet and causing my soul to split between good and evil. The Lord will save me. I know HE will. You're reported! No Stop IT!!! REPORTED!! NO!!!

I'm REPORTED!! No, I mean YOU'RE REPORTED!!!

you are PURELY INSANE!!

you need to get some help lady, have fun at church.

You are the DEVIL! I will pray for you. God help us all.

I will find out who you are when I report you! Stop belittling my name and my work!! I will pray for you in Church tomorrow.

#158, there are ways to find out who you are! I don't know how you got my name but stop degrading my work and my name!

#160, your soul is clearly lost.

#161, the Lord will have mercy on your soul. He knows who I am.

#162, I am naked.

I will report all fake Ednas!

Including the one in #164!!

My laptop is about to die so I will finally go to sleep before Church. Do not listen to the other Ednas. They blaspheme the Lord by acting as if they are me!

Lord, please help me show these good people here that post on Superficial, that I am a blessing to them and that they should heed my word, my word that is YOUR word.

Please Lord help me show them that posting disgusting comments that they are sinning and though we are all born sinners they need to be positive and not post demeaning or degrading comments.

Lord, please see that Gwen Stefani's child is born in a healthy manner.

Amen.

Im really sorry Edna. I was wrong. My dad used to whore me out to his freinds when i was 8. I have always had terrible acne also, these issues have ruined my self esteem.

IM CRYING EDNA! IM AFRAID OF JESUS!! CAN HE HELP ME????

I am very sorry to hear this. Have you ever tried Pro-Active? Jessica Simpson seemed to enjoy some success in clearing up her acne.

YOU STUPID BITCH!!! WHAT ABOUT MY OWN FATHER MOLESTING ME???WHAT ABOUT HIM SELLING ME SO HE COULD GET CRACK???CRACK EDNA!!!!PLEASE HELP ME!!!

#170 You are REPORTED!

ALL YOU CAN DO IS REPORT ME???YOU STUPID CUNTRAG!!!!!! REPORT THAT MY DADDY CORNHOLED MY ASS WITH A POOLSTICK!!!

See? First she turns into a black chick, and then she gets pregnant. SURPRISE SURPRISE, WHO DIDN'T SEE THAT ONE COMING?!

Ick. This 37 year-old wigger/spigger gives me the creeps. She always has.

God Bless this site. Nothing warms the cockles more than watching girls lucky enough to be born pretty throwing away their flimsy 'careers' by getting knocked up and permanently becoming sea donkey stretch mark pimple faced freaks that wouldn't sell handjobs in the park for a nickel anymore. This site is a celebration of that transformation that those of us who were born ugly and poor can revel together as we watch these stupid whores become the pasty trailer trash they always were on the inside.

Britney, Melissa, 'Kate', Gwen, Angelina... No amount of money is going to fix your fucked up body, you can get the fat sucked out and the sagging cellulite trimmed and sewn up but you will never show that belly button on the red carpet again. Play the 'proud mom' game all you want - it's 'drinkey drinkey' time when the cameras aren't rolling isn't it honey?

HOLLYJ-This is a genius post! Im crying.

@87 Cube .. ACK!! Are you serious? They need that? Aren't they surrounded by pulsating genitals? Who the hell needs stimulation when they're constantly buried under a sea of inflammed holes and poles???

Now onto more important business. Gwen is was and always will be hot. Tony Kanal doesnt know what he lost out on. But then again I've been told his dick is 10 inches so he cant be missing much. So all the Gwen haters...put a pie in it.

And finally the most important news of them all.

Tom Cruise loves the cock (even more than Gavin Rossdale)

Speaking as a Jamaican, Gwen Stefani is not one of us and I don't think she's even trying to be. I laughed at #123 if those people think they are rustas just because they listen to Bob Marley then they're the stupidest fuckers around. I always laugh when people think that somehow confirms they know reggae music.

Oh and Edna, I'm very disappointed in you. You say you're here to do God's work yet KW revealed something that was clearly a very traumatic and disturbing thing to you and all you could do was report her?. Shame on you Edna, shame on you.

Btw KW, I had a similar experience, only it was my mum who used to whore me out to this guy who owned a Cafe so that she could sing there. He was fat and smelt like urine and use to always shout 'Scientology Rules'!!whenever he finished.

I can't wait for Monday.... We need new threads. Although posts 140 and on were so fuckin' funny, I pissed me drawers laughing.

I hope she doesnt get britney spears syndrom. I have had a child so i dont care about what i look like or that i once had a successful career. It makes me kinda sad

The name of the film will be Batman vs Fatwoman !!

http://www.lezlife.com

Edna: We don't WANT to be "saved." Leave us all alone. If we change our minds, we know where the churches are. You can't force it...all you are doing is wasting your time when you could be kneeling by your bed, giving the lord head. Not to mention you're pissing us off. If this site and other sites like it are so "evil", STOP COMING HERE and let us be.

P.S. I bet there are glory holes in the confessional booths for the priests. Don't even lie Edna, you know what a glory hole is.

P.S.S. Let me save you the trouble...I REPORTED MYSELF!!

edna. please. kill yourself. for the last fucking time.

Last night I had a vision regarding you filthy Internet perverts. Jesus came to me. In fact, he came all over me.

Last night I had a vision regarding you filthy Internet perverts. Jesus came to me. In fact, he came all over me.

I think Tian hit it the first time when he said that Gwen Stefani looks like the witch from Snow White:

http://www.tian.cc/2006/04/gwen-stefani-witch.html

POST SOMETHING NEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW.

Party at my place next Saturday. Sherry-co, you are NOT invited, but everyone else is. Edna, could you bring the Jesus Juice? Osh, just come in your panties, please. (I know I just did, just thinkin' about it) BigJim has the camera all ready. boredmilf and I are thinking of pole dancing for the entertainment, then mamacita, TrannyGranny, Dr. Rokter, Gerald Tarrant and I are planning on naked Twister Tournament with plenty of whip cream. The first prize is a 3-way with whomever you want. Please RSVP.

Love you all.

Naked twister. I won a gold medal in that event. I won with a "Left testicle, green" call.

what a piece of shit edna is....and who would put THAT pic of yourself on the internet. She looks like some fat drag queen who turned down for Hairspray. In other news, Tom Cruise loves the cock and Edna has home videos of it.

his/her child will be surely less weak than that of britney... even if the dress does not make the monk !

http://www.lezlife.com

You are all getting reported!!

krisdylee:

I'm so far in on that action that I'm ready to crawl out your mouth.

Edna shouldn't you be finishing off an entire tray of brownies , rather than posting? I really couldn't give a shit who you report me to...while you are at it, report yourself to Weight Watchers, because you are a fat piece of shit

IDEA!!!! ******

I think we should implore the SF crew to set up a weekend writer. We need a funny (wo)manservant that'll give us shit to comment on while Edna reports us to the profanity police and masterbates her G-hole with a wide-mouthed jar of mayo whilst eyeing a photo of Bush when he said "Rarely is the question asked--is our children learning?" (<-Holy shit, that's the world's longest sentence)

It's horrible to sit here for two solid days with nothing new to make fun off.

Besides, they could put up a disclaimer, like, "the weekend writer is a lackey, and he's doing this for free because he's a desperate loser, so if it's not funny, too bad" ... or "we're letting HollyJ tell you about intestinal worms this weekend..." ...

#194: I volunteer. Send me the basics of the story and I'll write something so funny you'll blow a gopher out your ass.

don't fuck with my gopher
he's a keeper

comment on this:
http://media.ebaumsworld.com/kittyplay.mpeg

Jesus told me to shave my nether region and get a tattoo of my beloved George W. Now I can look at my Bush in the mirror whenever I want to.

Fake Edna, judging by that pic on the Yahoo profile you haven't seen your bush, tatooed or otherwise, in a good many years. And no man has for that matter, I mean *vomit*

"Penguinjoker"

Awesome. This place is better than the Onion.

Chuck Norrise makes Onions cry.

200th.

#197 You are REPORTED! I will make sure nobody can soil my good name.

Edna, are you aware that there are most likely others here that don't want to be what you call 'saved'?

Are you even aware that there are most likely others here that are not even christians? They could be jewish or muslims or budhist.. Do they need to be 'saved' by you? Do you think it's right to impose or force your religion on others of different faiths?

Please try to understand. No matter how much you find this site offensive to yourself or to your religion, you have to respect other people's faith especially if it doesn't correspond to yours. And you need to understand that by coming to this website you accept that you are entering a place where people's views will be different than yours and thus, most likely, will be different.

Are people here offensive? sure. Do they swear alot? sure. Does swearing and being offensive in their posting make them bad people? not at all. because in the end, these are just words Edna. and they are opinions. some just choose to be vulgar about it by swearing because, believe it or not, some of us actually find these creative ways of swearing to be humorous. but that doesn't mean we are all like that in real life!

Please let us choose to speak our mind let it be offensive to you or not. because in the end, i'm sure god believes in humanity's free will just as he believes in us.

hello.....edna is a fraud...damn, you people are either really stupid, or just 'special'

oh yeah, TCLTC

Posted by Dr.Rokter on April 29, 2006 10:45 AM ............now THAT is some funny fucking shit....doesnt happen in here often, but by gawd, when it does happen, its a beautiful thing.

Gangbang at my place tonight.

Edna go hump a dead moose or something... nobody cares about you... Va de retro scortor pro mundi beneficio! Drop dead now, will you

Oh and TCLTC :-P

All of this is getting so old.

Penguijoker...hilarious.

is it me or is this fake edna bambrick shit a thousand times more irritating and stupid than the real edna, sherry co, and megan harris combined. actually wait, the people who think its the real edna are more irritating. you guys are retarded

#206, please stop trying to make me look bad. You will not be able to stop my mission. Jesus is on my side and I will clean the Internet. I am not a fraud but the fakers are.

Anakin, I want to save everyone whatever their religion. The Lord loves everyone equally, except for you.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Internet_troll

Be smart and ignore all Edna Bambrick messages. It is unbelievable how many people are responding to this crap. Please ignore and all of the Edna's will finally shut up.

Boy you said it, Edn...er huh ..Edna.

Almost First! :-/

#203:

My mom says I'm speshul.

#196:

Not sure if this is "gopher worthy" or not, but here goes:

As further indication that the war in Iraq is having the desired outcome of bringing freedom to a people oppressed for so long, examples of western values of life and liberty are popping up everywhere in this war-torn country.

A nation that, under strict Islamic law, had forbade the making or distribution of pornographic material is now generating its own form of adult entertainment. The attached clip is a typical example of this burgeoning new industry that will help Iraqis take their rightful place as citizens of the twenty-first century.

http://media.ebaumsworld.com/kittyplay.mpeg

As you can see, Iraqi porn is still in its infancy stages. Much like the North American produced adult films of the early seventies, the advent of shaving has not yet caught on. However, as Iraqi men (and women) become more discerning in their pornographic purchases, we are sure to see more films that include stars that have undergone hair removal.

This is pathetic! Can we PLEASE have a damn current post. Or, are all the SF writers illegal immigrants and they're out protesting today?!?!

Pinky:

Didn't you like mine? I'm looking for a job.

@219- LOL, no mas trabajo.

BigJim: I love everything about you. That goes without saying.

Damn, time to clean up the keyboard again.

I think the hamster that powers the superfish server may have died, or was a foreign worker. I always thought the superfish guy may have snuck into the country as well.
He seems, on occasion, a bit...bitter.

Allow me to cleanse you BigJim.

#219/221 - Does it seem fitting to anyone else that they protest by NOT WORKING?! Here in San Antonio, which we now call San Mexico (wink wink, Stallion), they had a guy in the news who had crossed the border illegally and got lost in the desert somewhere in Arizona. He was complaining about drinking his own pee to survive. Hey buddy, don't complain to me - it's not like you were invited to come over here. Illegals piss me off.
I guess it's better to be pissed off than pissed on. La migra! La migra! Vamonos!

I hope this "boycott of working today" amounts to a whole bunch of nothing, i.e. in effect of what actually happens to the economy and/or shipping products today, etc.

By the way, why didn't they plan it for Friday, Cinco de Mayo, baby!! Pour the tequila!!!

And I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy.

Q: Why does the Mexican Olympic team always do so poorly?

A: Because everyone who can run, jump or swim is already across the border.

@228: Gotta admit, took me a couple of reads for that one. Tee-hee

@226 San Mexico......hehehehehehe

I rather be pissed off then have to drink my own piss, unless of course I just got done eating Asparagus because I love the way my pee smells after that, so I would have to think it would taste good .......

Stallion:

You like the smell of asparagus pee? I think it stinks like a bio-hazard. It smells bad enough to knock a buzzard off a gut pile. Ewww.

Last!

Asparagus pee is very stinky. I do not heart it.
#228 - Very good! That was actually funny. I dislike you a little less now. :-P

Can you imagine if someone gave you a golden shower with asparagus pee?

Imagine, I dream of a Asparagus golden shower from Vito on Brokeback Sopranos.........Stallion likey......

If we don't get a fresh story here soon I'm going to have to go jerk off in a libtards salad just to have something to do.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:DoNotFeedTroll.png

To the tune of the Beverly Hillbillies:

Well, let me tell you a story about a bitch named Ed(na)
Fundamentalist Christian and here’s a what she said
“Stop all your disgusting posting or here’s what I’m gonna do…
“Shove your head up my cunt with all its nasty cooze.”
Jizz, that is. Spermatozoa. Leftover like.

Well, next thing you know, Edna’s on the warpath.
Reporting everybody laying down a righteous wrath.
But the Superficial folk, well they was brave and true
So they all told Edna to drink the Lord’s goo.
Spooge, that is. Jesus Juice. Asparagus flavored.

#228: Way to rip off a Johnny Carson bit from 40 years ago. This crowd would find that funny.

#236 - You like a tall stack of "Johnny Cakes" - want to ride my hog?
All he wanted to do was fight the guy so they could make up.

Land-bitch:

Never said I made it up. Speaking of making things up, how big is your dick today?

#240 It's a miracle, Land-Man said something that didn't involve his Land-Milk, Land-Balls, Land-Cock, Land-Ho........

Jacq- I agree with you about the illegals. A lot of them come here and get paid under the table, pay no taxes, then send their kids to public schools, so the rest of the tax payers are now supporting them. Then they get all annoyed for whatever reason, I can't really figure it out, and decide not to go to work. Fine. Get fired and go home, so that the people who are here legally can have your jobs.
Just had to vent about that issue. Annoys me.

Old But still funny, Bush is retarded!!!!!!

Donald Rumsfeld is briefing George Bush in the Oval Office."Oh and
finally, sir, three Brazilian soldiers were killed in Iraq today."

Bush goes pale, his jaw hanging open in stunned disbelief. He buries his face in his hands, muttering "My God... My God."

"Mr. President," says Rumsfeld, "we lose soldiers all the time, and it's terrible. But I've never seen you so upset. What's the matter?"

Bush looks up and says..."How many is a Brazilian?"

I am not a troll as you will all find out when the Lord makes you pay the price for your lives of sin.

244: wow youre a fucking idiot and should probably be stoned or tarred and feathered in the streets. you want the job of an illegal immigrant? really? is that what you really want? somehow i dont think illegal immigrants are sitting on their fat fast food filled asses starting at a computer and a celebrity blog in the middle of the afternoon as you are in your comfy office life

i dont think anything ever posted on this site has made me so mad. go fuck yourself or kill yourself.

Italian Stallion YOU HAVE BEEN REPORTED LIBTARD!!!

@239: You make me giggle.

"How many is a Brazilian" - Brilliant!

If I have to look at Stefani one more time when I log in, I'm going to beat myself in the twat.

*thankyou*, spatz. you are 100% correct. i mean, do you think these people want to be picking produce in the blazing heat or scrubbing toilets with NO BENEFITS for next to nothing? if they could get over-the-table jobs and pay taxes, they would...why shouldn't we spread the wealth a little bit? We're human beings before we're Americans, folks

Instead of people bitching about illegal immigrants, I'd like to read some feedback on my Edna Hillbilly song.

I require validation!

#244 - I do agree. I think that the part about the entire thing that is least fair is in regard to the people who do come legally and work hard to become American. I don't mean in the McDonalds, white bread sense, I mean those who bust their ass to make a living and become naturalized citizens. I resent the fact that those who try to follow the rules are at a disadvantage and those who cut in line end up on my meal ticket. I'm not saying that I don't like hispanic people, but I hate the guy who has the back of his pick-up loaded with kids and lawn mowers, who isn't carrying insurance because he doesn't "exist" here, who is going to hit my car because he can't read the STOP sign. The people who run, jump and swim end up on my friend's ranches, leaving a trail of trash behind them, breaking into barns and storage facilities to get by. That's bullshit. I can understand wanting a better life, but to come here and create the same dichotomy between the poor and wealthy Mexicans in Mexico is ridiculous. I don't hate Mexicans and I live in a place where they are the MAJORITY, I hate illegals and there is a BIG difference between the two.

big jimbo, (may i call you that?) i think your song was brilliant. much like most things you post. but i got homicidal for a moment. just the thought of tar and feathering a fascist whore like little watson gets me hot and bothered and it was hard to concentrate on anything else..

oh and fisher, you put it well. i dont know many "illegal" immigrants who have the luxury of working in offices where they get to fuck off online (like i do and like i imagine 90% of the superficals do)

Theres a shoker...a latino that refuses to work. What's next.....Tom Cruise admitting to liking the dick?

Fisher55, the LAST thing anyone here gives a shit about is your opinion. Sure, I don't want their jobs, seeing as how I have an education and more earning potential. It's bullshit when someone ends up on welfare, who can't get a better job, because some freakin' illegal beaner took their job. Then, we end up carrying the load for them both.

i know this might be sacrilidge, considering sherry co told me i was your butt buddy, but i officially think you suck jacq but not for your views, i dont care what you think about illegals and how much you hate mexicans, its your right. but because youre bringing something so serious that people have lots of passion about to the superficial. i thought there was an unspoken rule that things like this didnt get brought into the conversation. you really suck.

what else do you want to talk about jacq, 9/11, the war in iraq, sudan,

oh and what makes you think people care more about your fascist opinions then fisher. guess what jacq, nobody cares about yours, his or my opinions. i especially dont care about yours at this point.

#250 - One more thing - If you're so gung-ho about working and giving it all away, go be a "human being first" in Cuba. That's not an original idea. It's called communism.

Spatz, eat the corn out of my shit. Can you find anything else on this site to talk about? If you don't want to see what I write, then don't read it, you fuck. You wouldn't happen to be online because you skipped work today, would you?

God, I hate ignorant cock-suckers.

I only write about what inspires me, and like i said, you shouldnt bring serious things to the superficial. its just stupid. shame too cause usually i enjoy reading what you write. except when you sound like a rampant racist nazi. youre calling me ignorant when youre calling people "beaners". are you fucking retarded or something?

#259 LMFAO

I am not a rampant, racist Nazi. There are white people and white trash, there are Mexicans and there are beaners, there are African Americans and well...
I do feel like Nazi Germany, though.
Maybe I'm talking about something relevant because - oh I don't know - I'm intelligent? Here is the definititon as posted by urban dictionary:
A Mexican person living in the United States that supposedly eats beans. Usually an illegal imigrint that recently crossed the US border

OR

Beaner is often mistaken for a "lazy" mexican border-hopping spic.
Thats not the case. You cant honestly call beaners "lazy"
They work on roofs from like 6AM til until dark....They work on yard's all day long....and will usually cover about a 55 mile radius of yards in that period of time.
They work on cars....and good at it.....REAL good at it....
They're not lazy.....but they are border-hopping spics.

My boss is hispanic, my best friends are hispanic, our maid is hispanic and I love her to death. I hate the lazy people who get here and want a free ride. What I had to say wouldn't have been nearly as big a deal if you had just left it alone.

Do you live anywhere with and overwhelming illegal population? You should come watch the news here and see all of the raids and busts going on. There is not a $10K fine per person for employing illegal aliens because they OUGHT to be here. Do you even know what's happening on the border, not far from where I am now?

#260 I just had to spatz on your mom's vagina to get it wet, man she's getting old. Do me a favor and get her some K-y for mothers day so I don't have this problem again, thank you.......When your done with the corn I had some peanuts last night......

BTW - You only write about what inpires you? Give me a fucking break. You are seriously inspired by Gwen's baby-bump? You're calling ME fucking retarded?! Give me a break.

Posted by Jacq on May 1, 2006 04:01 PM

"Beaner is often mistaken for a "lazy" mexican border-hopping spic.
Thats not the case. You cant honestly call beaners "lazy"
They work on roofs from like 6AM til until dark....They work on yard's all day long....and will usually cover about a 55 mile radius of yards in that period of time.
They work on cars....and good at it.....REAL good at it....
They're not lazy.....but they are border-hopping spics."

....hahahahahah stop it!! your killing me over here!!

Immigrant: (in a latino accent)"I hate your country you americans do not treat us failry..so we will not work until we are treated fairly!

Gov. Official: Um..ok fine we will treat you fairly. You can start working again.

Immigrant: (in a latino accent) Uh, I start next week. I have to go to my 80th cousin on my mother's side birthday. But you can pay me anyway!

I wish I knew why corn doesn't digest all that well. The fact that it is clearly identifiable in one's shit does not speak volumes to the nutritional value it provides.

I wonder, were one to eat the corn out of another's (or their own) shit, would more of it digest the second time through, or would there still be corn in that person's shit too?

How many times does corn have to be eaten, picked out of shit (and hopefully cleaned off), and then eaten again before it ceases to show up in the shit?

Enquiring minds want to know. I volunteer sherry-cunt and Edna for this experiment.

Spatz- Maybe you need to realize that a lot of people would love to have the jobs that the illegals are taking. These jobs are not all toilet-scrubbing. Maybe you only know your housekeeper and local dishwasher, but lots of illegals make decent money and are not paying taxes on it.
There are avenues people can take to become citizens of this country. They need to research them. I am referring to the group of people who come to this country illegally, don't pay taxes, and don't learn the language.

SHUUUUUT UUUPPPPP!!! How the fuck did we go from Gwen Stefani to illegal immigrants, take your god damn conversation to Craigs List Rants and Raves where it belongs

Sorry Libraesque, but this happens all the time. The Gwyneth Paltrow baby shower turned into an abortion debate, and the Avril Lavigne having a belly went on forever about something unrelated...
But you're right. I'll stop.

You tell them Jacq! If you want to work and live here, become a citizen. Do not come here and expect me to support you and your whole extended family on MY dollar. I love these assholes who cry about "human rights" blah blah blah but fail to see that there are AMERICAN CITIZENS that need the government resources and social services that are not getting it due to these illegals taking it all. I am so sick of peope screaming "racist, nazi, facist" when we dare to demand that people who live here PAY TAXES AND BECOME CITIZENS. Why should I have to go without so a bunch of illegals can come here, flout our laws and customs, buy houses and drive nice cars because they don't pay taxes? I can't even get my car fixed because of the exorbitant taxes I pay to support these freeloaders. Yeah, I'm a racist. Sure. Because I hate illegal immigration, be it white, black or whatever, that makes me "ignorant". Bite me. I hope you'll be happy in your new Mexican states of America, and when they drive down your wages and standard of living, don't you DARE bitch and moan about it. I couldn't get a dime from the government if I was starving because I am white. But I'M the racist? Whatever. You obviously don't even know what racism is, and that it happens EVERY DAMN DAY to whites along with all other races, so don't you dare call me racist. I guess I can't get social srevices, etc, because I have more class than to play the race card or make EVERY GOD DAMN thing about race. People like you make me sick, Fisher55 and Spatz, always crying about "RACISM, OH NOES U R A RACIST1!!111!" I hope you freaking choke on that shit. Eat it and die.

I PAID A HAWAIIAN TO MOW MY LAWN TODAY
he even set up some tiki torches as a little decoration. I like him better than the mex who usually does my lawn. You're fired, Rodrigo!

BigJim why are you such a twat. God just becoz people have religions your a fuckin cunt about it. Leave everyone's business to themselves or you'll have to change your name to BigNose

I paid a Hawaiian to jerk off in my Mexitard salad. It tasted like pinapple tacos.