April 19, 2006
Avril Lavigne hits the gym

I'm not allowed to look at these pictures because I made a vow years ago that I would never find Avril Lavigne attractive. At least I think it's Avril Lavigne. When did she turn into a 12-year-old girl? Not that I find 12-year-old girls attractive, I just don't remember Avril ever being this small. Or my penis being this large. And yet here we are, having this horribly awkward conversation.

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Comments
1. Posted by Barbara on April 19, 2006 11:02 AM
wasn't there a post a few days ago saying how gross she looked?
2. Posted by keronac on April 19, 2006 11:04 AM
what a cute butt!
3. Posted by DonLes91 on April 19, 2006 11:04 AM
Yeah, something about her navel poking out. You can still see it in that second pic - that's nasty.
4. Posted by ziggurat on April 19, 2006 11:05 AM
i would hit that crying, because of all the regret ... so much regret ...
5. Posted by DonLes91 on April 19, 2006 11:06 AM
She's so skinny, she defies the laws of gravity (3rd pic).
6. Posted by Jacq on April 19, 2006 11:06 AM
What is she, 3 freakin' feet tall? She makes that sedan look like an Excursion.
You can take the girl out of Canada, but you can never get the smell out of her hair.
Nice ass, fatty.
7. Posted by Feed_Me_Chocolate on April 19, 2006 11:06 AM
She needs a tan.
8. Posted by miss_paris on April 19, 2006 11:07 AM
damn it...almost first..
anyway....cute pics...but she looks very ugly in the last 1. and WHY IS SHE STANDING IN THE RAIN WITH HER PHONE?? stupid.
9. Posted by miss_paris on April 19, 2006 11:08 AM
oh and...she looks like shes flying in the last pic...LOL. *magical Avril*
10. Posted by biatcho on April 19, 2006 11:12 AM
Seriously. In last week's post it looked like she was standing next to a Monster Truck, so naturally she would look tiny.
But here she's standing next to a Saturn or some crappy car like that and she still looks like a cast-off from the LolliPop Kids. Dwarfs are people too.
11. Posted by tits_on_snack on April 19, 2006 11:12 AM
There's one of those hideous designer handbags I was talking abooot.
She looks like crap as a blonde.
What other mean things can I say... I'm sure I'll be back with more.
12. Posted by Vampyreska on April 19, 2006 11:12 AM
Did she just pour bleach all over her head? Go to the hairdresser, hon! You can afford it!
13. Posted by biatcho on April 19, 2006 11:13 AM
LOL #9
14. Posted by mamacita on April 19, 2006 11:15 AM
@8
You can't say "almost first" when you're 8th. That's like saying Tom Cruise is "almost sane" or that ning-ning is "almost intelligent". It just doesn't make sense. Look, I don't make the rules, I just follow them.
15. Posted by HappyTimeHarry on April 19, 2006 11:17 AM
The first pic gives me a rager. Although she looks like a tiny vampire in the other 2.
16. Posted by Chrystal03 on April 19, 2006 11:18 AM
Yuck, she looks like a baby squirrel with bad hair...
17. Posted by The Mad Scientologist on April 19, 2006 11:18 AM
Yep, it looks like Avril's been working hard to tone those buns. She better....if she wants to sit on my face.
18. Posted by CheekyChops on April 19, 2006 11:22 AM
she reminds me of a ferret. An albino one.
19. Posted by EvilFiend on April 19, 2006 11:25 AM
HA HA ! She's a Butta-Face!
20. Posted by Kevin on April 19, 2006 11:28 AM
Vampire? Albino? No, just Canadian.
21. Posted by Land-Man on April 19, 2006 11:28 AM
I bet she's in Los Angeles.
22. Posted by Land-Man on April 19, 2006 11:29 AM
Guess how I know.
23. Posted by gammanormids on April 19, 2006 11:31 AM
Ok, I don't like this chic, but I can't say she doesn't look good. She does look good
24. Posted by adrock2xander on April 19, 2006 11:33 AM
Damn she's got a fine ass and perky small breasts. I'll do her. Midget or not.
25. Posted by Chrystal03 on April 19, 2006 11:34 AM
she looks good from the ankle down...
26. Posted by gammanormids on April 19, 2006 11:35 AM
Ok, I don't like this chic, but I can't say she doesn't look good. She does look good
27. Posted by lebowski on April 19, 2006 11:36 AM
Her parents were obviously abusive, beating her face with the ugly stick every time she tried to ask nicely if they would let her out of that dark closet.
28. Posted by mamacita on April 19, 2006 11:37 AM
@26
Does she look good?
29. Posted by UNWASHEDMASSES on April 19, 2006 11:37 AM
#6 - I was thinking the same thing. Where was she working out at, Billy Barty's Half Pint Gym? Does anyone know how tall she is? I used to entertain thoughts of tapping that ass, but how can one when she is literally the size of a penis??
30. Posted by UNWASHEDMASSES on April 19, 2006 11:38 AM
#6 - I was thinking the same thing. Where was she working out at, Billy Barty's Half Pint Gym? Does anyone know how tall she is? I used to entertain thoughts of tapping that ass, but how can one when she is literally the size of a penis??
31. Posted by lebowski on April 19, 2006 11:38 AM
Her parents were obviously abusive, beating her face with the ugly stick every time she tried to ask nicely if they would let her out of that dark closet.
32. Posted by oshkoshb-goshdammgosh on April 19, 2006 11:39 AM
I want to throw things at her ass, varying from darts to quarters to tomatoes to dildos. I just can't make up my mind!
33. Posted by lebowski on April 19, 2006 11:40 AM
Her parents were obviously abusive, beating her face with the ugly stick every time she tried to ask nicely if they would let her out of that dark closet.
34. Posted by UNWASHEDMASSES on April 19, 2006 11:40 AM
#6 - I was thinking the same thing. Where was she working out at, Billy Barty's Half-Pint Gym?
35. Posted by bjpack on April 19, 2006 11:40 AM
I did not believe it when I heard it but apparently Tom Cruise sprinkled some Xenuvian pixie dust on Avril just before the third picture was taken. I looked up the license plate for the van in the picture in my database (4FPT237) and it does indeed belong to Tom. Apparently, in the first picture Avril was calling her publicist to say she was going to be late for an appearance. In between pix 1 and 2, Tom got out to ask what the problem was. She explained and hence, he shared the pixie dust. She locked her car door (pic #2) and was off to fly to her appearance. Say what you want about him, but he is a good man, afterall.
36. Posted by 51Cent on April 19, 2006 11:41 AM
I think this girl has Brittany Spears white trash potential all over her...
This could be K-fed's next victim...
37. Posted by thatsnothot on April 19, 2006 11:42 AM
ew she looks gross. what exactly did she do to deserve any attention at all? had one hit song four years ago? she's not even newsworthy. maybe if she were hot i would actually care...
38. Posted by oshkoshb-goshdammgosh on April 19, 2006 11:42 AM
I wanna pick her up by the ankles and dunk her in some sweet and sour sauce. Is that gross?
39. Posted by lebowski on April 19, 2006 11:43 AM
Damn it!! It's never as good the 2nd time!
40. Posted by thatsnothot on April 19, 2006 11:47 AM
i just read she was 5'2" somewhere for whoever was asking
41. Posted by ESQ on April 19, 2006 11:50 AM
Another that works out to improve themselves mentally and physically is definitely a winner in my book.
42. Posted by enfilade on April 19, 2006 11:52 AM
Nice ass, but she looks like an alien from star trek.
http://www.wehateeverybody.com/
43. Posted by 51Cent on April 19, 2006 11:52 AM
She is no hotter that the other junior high school girls I was scoping out in my blacked-out white conversion van this morning...
44. Posted by Sheva on April 19, 2006 11:55 AM
Hmmn 5'2" is respectable. She's maybe less. But a cute smurf with a nice rear.
45. Posted by Sheva on April 19, 2006 11:57 AM
Hmmn 5'2" is respectable. She's maybe less. But a cute smurf with a nice rear.
46. Posted by hendero on April 19, 2006 12:03 PM
uh, #8, I think you'll find that's a car key she's holding, not a phone. Even Derek Zoolander's phone wasn't that small.
If you can't tell the difference between the two, can I just borrow your cell phone for a second.
47. Posted by MOCKERFOCKER on April 19, 2006 12:03 PM
You guys are "Tomkat Eating Placenta" insane. I would SO tap that. That petite little figure that just screams fuck me-fuck me- fuck me. Cute little pout on her lips. (If you've seen bikini pics u know she's racked too!)
You guys can have ur Pam Anderson 95% gellitan candy spore-whore tranny. I'll take Avril. Stop off at my work Avril, I'll hot wax that hood! (no really, I work mon-thurs at the Reseda On-The-Rag Carwash!
HALFPRICE too!- if my buddy Jimbos working the register!)
48. Posted by gossipmonger on April 19, 2006 12:03 PM
I googled her to see how tall she was (5'1", 5'2" and 5'3" were all found on various sites but 5'2" seems to be the most common guess) but this made me LOL from this site :
http://www.avril-lavigne.ws/index2.php?x=info/vitalstats.php
Piercings: Navel (inny)
HAHA! So maybe she is just wearing an 8-ball navel ring...
49. Posted by ElFurbe on April 19, 2006 12:04 PM
Quoth the D:
"Man I'd like to place my hand upon your f!#%in' sexy ass and squeeze."
Not to get too urban here, but that thing is like WHOA. Can I get some fries? Sir Mix-a-Lot can't believe she's white. I'm just not sure what she's gonna do with all that junk. Avril, you looks good, won't you back that ass up?
Even though I preferred her without the blonde, it's not really my FOCUS at the moment.
50. Posted by MeganHarris on April 19, 2006 12:06 PM
I'm taller than this fat bitch.
51. Posted by Shelton Bumgarner on April 19, 2006 12:12 PM
She does have a big olde butt for such an otherwise skinny frame. I have to say, though, that overall she's pretty cute.
52. Posted by mamacita on April 19, 2006 12:14 PM
MeganHarris, you have the intelligence and comprehension of a bowl of pubes.
53. Posted by BigJim on April 19, 2006 12:16 PM
That is some sweet looking camel toe. I'd definitely nail her. She actually looks like a normal human being, and not some fabricated, plastic surgitized, bleached, brainless fuckwit like Paris Hilton who is so stupid she has to tattoo her own name upside down on her tits so she doesn't forget it.
Canadian chicks are hot.
54. Posted by LB on April 19, 2006 12:18 PM
I'd hit that into oblivion, sure, but don't those last two pictures seem a bit unnatural? There's just something about it...
Anyway, does she still perform, or is she just living on what she earned previously?
55. Posted by LB on April 19, 2006 12:18 PM
I'd hit that into oblivion, sure, but don't those last two pictures seem a bit unnatural? There's just something about it...
Anyway, does she still perform, or is she just living on what she earned previously?
56. Posted by poisonys on April 19, 2006 12:19 PM
I love that she's wearing lululemon pants, which is an athletic line based in Vancouver. Nice to see her represent.
57. Posted by Mr. Fritz on April 19, 2006 12:25 PM
It goes to show that "celebrities" need makeup artists and hair stylists to look hot. She's kinda cute, but she looks stoned. I know this, because I like the Mary Jane.
58. Posted by Italian Stallion on April 19, 2006 12:26 PM
# 38 I want to pick her up by her ankles and dunk her in a pool of acid, Then I will have sex with her. Is that gross?
I didn't think so either.......
59. Posted by Trotter on April 19, 2006 12:28 PM
@38 Not gross, unless you plan to eat her.
I'd rather dip her by the ankles into a vat of hungry pirhannas.
60. Posted by Porcelina on April 19, 2006 12:38 PM
If theres one person in this world that hates her, its ME!
My friend went to highschool with her and said avril wanted to be the next dixie chicks, shes a country singer/lover all the way. Second of all, she came into our spa one time and past out during her treatments cus she was either a)still drunk or b)still coked out.
Shes a poser. Gah.
61. Posted by oshkoshb-goshdammgosh on April 19, 2006 12:49 PM
60 - obviously you're Canadian, because here in the USA passing out from a cocaine bender in a spa is hella kewl.
I want to rub mayonaise all over her ass and make motorboat sounds on it with my face and then swing her around my head by her ponytail. Is that gross?
62. Posted by Lala on April 19, 2006 12:51 PM
Superfish, next time you start feeling turned on, do this:
Picture her wearing a stripey tie and black wristbands, doing jazz hands while singing "Sk8er Boi".
You're welcome.
63. Posted by Derek Hail on April 19, 2006 12:52 PM
Avril Lavigne has been hot lately. These pictures a little old though. Like a week! She very well may have gained 10 pounds since these pictures were taken.
64. Posted by Trotter on April 19, 2006 12:53 PM
@60 - totally gross, but it also makes me kinda hard and sweaty. And I'm currently overdosed on oxycodone, naproxen and flexiril - so you're extra hot.
65. Posted by Porcelina on April 19, 2006 12:53 PM
Ahaha and the fact that my friend went to school with her in Kingston doesn't give it away that I'm canadian?
And no, here in Canada, we just all get drunk more so than coked out. And since shes been in the states for awhile, I doubt her little body could handle our beer anymore.
66. Posted by bigponie on April 19, 2006 12:57 PM
I've seen that bag in a S&M store in hollywood, I bet she's got some whip, face mask and butt-plugs in there.
67. Posted by JussDuckie on April 19, 2006 12:59 PM
She's 5'3", people! Give the shortie a break!
68. Posted by HappyTimeHarry on April 19, 2006 1:01 PM
Porcelina please stfu and get back to watching Hockey, Im not impressed you know someone who went to school with her
69. Posted by The Mad Scientologist on April 19, 2006 1:05 PM
I know a friend of someone that works in Wendy's, who served a biggie-sized #6 to someone, who gave first-aid to someone who farted in church who was joined by...who the fuck cares...blah blah blah....Canadians can eat a dick
70. Posted by The Mad Scientologist on April 19, 2006 1:06 PM
I know a friend of someone that works in Wendy's, who served a biggie-sized #6 to someone, who gave first-aid to someone who farted in church who was joined by...who the fuck cares...blah blah blah....Canadians can eat a dick
71. Posted by Jacq on April 19, 2006 1:08 PM
Trotter, is it supper hella hot?
#60 - All I can say is that if someone wants to pass out on coke, that's weak. Heart attack? Maybe, but only if you're a pussy. But just to be clear, I am not disagreeing with you - we both hate her.
72. Posted by mushmouth on April 19, 2006 1:10 PM
Since she's already so white but so hot, I'm gonna be her skaterboi, take her to my room and dip her in marshmallow creme and have a big sticky-sweet hellutime more than once with her... in the meantimg Tom Cruise will be in my back bedroom lovin on some strange cock.
73. Posted by ifrit239 on April 19, 2006 1:12 PM
#68 - your comment astounds me. You must be the most intelligent, worldly person in the world! I can't believe you figured out the Canadian way of life. Thats right folks, we just sit around and watch hockey. All. Day. Long.
74. Posted by oshkoshb-goshdammgosh on April 19, 2006 1:13 PM
I have a friend that went to school in Puerto Rico, does that make me Bolivian? Or maybe I've been drinking too much of that super-potent, hardcore Canadian beer. You know, the kind that over a period of a few years renders you legally retarded?
No, wait, I've been doing coke in the US and I don't have any friends. I forgot.
75. Posted by BigJim on April 19, 2006 1:13 PM
Canada Rocks!
america (lower case intentional) Sucks!
We don't get our jollies by invading other nations under false pretenses and killing their civilians.
76. Posted by Porcelina on April 19, 2006 1:14 PM
All I'm saying is that shes a loser.
Simmer down folks.
Too bad its assholes like #68 and #69 that give most americans a bad rap in ALL countries. Why do americans wear canadian flag patches on their backpacks?
77. Posted by Porcelina on April 19, 2006 1:15 PM
funny how the web browsers allow an american to tell me to eat a dick, yet won't let me say something similar to an american.
78. Posted by Porcelina on April 19, 2006 1:16 PM
Thank you big jim.
79. Posted by Trotter on April 19, 2006 1:17 PM
Jacq - my balls just burst into flames. White hot flames of lust. Like the kind dogs get when a bitch is all stanky with musky heat, but hotter. I gotta get some air.
80. Posted by BigJim on April 19, 2006 1:18 PM
You're welcome, Porcelina.
81. Posted by oshkoshb-goshdammgosh on April 19, 2006 1:19 PM
I personally go around invading other nations under false pretenses and killing their civilians all the time, but I usually have to borrow my uncle's truck since I can fit more ammo in the bed. I also feel confident in my superiority over all other nationalities because of penis size and car size. I eat at McDonalds every day and drive an SUV just so I can waste gas! I'm a gun-happy redneck who can't spell "Yourup" or locate it on a globe! I buy breast implants for my 12 year old nieces and refuse to learn other languages!
Please spare me, BigJim. I've seen that Michael Moore movie.
82. Posted by BigJim on April 19, 2006 1:20 PM
Go Flames, Go! Kick Anaheim's american ass.
83. Posted by biatcho on April 19, 2006 1:20 PM
76: I thought it was white trash like Britney Spears & Lohan that gave Americans bad names? But surely the mad scientist on the Superficial.com is heading the list of all hated Americans because everyone on the Superficial is totally famous (according to heiferzzzz).
And who the fuck still wears a backpack? The only reason any moron would wear a red maple leaf on their backpack would be because we stole all your hockey teams because you suck.
Although I do love Labatt's beer. It's delicious for breakfast.
84. Posted by tits_on_snack on April 19, 2006 1:21 PM
Passed out from a cocaine bender? How does that work? All my coke benders leave me wide awake and twitching for days, laying in bed staring up at the ceiling and vibrating, dry-mouthed, teeth grinding, nailing the curtains to the wall.
By the way, how come the only Canadian music that makes it big in the U.S. is the pop crap? Avril, and Nickelback, and shit like that - Americans eat it up like biggie fries.
85. Posted by Chrystal03 on April 19, 2006 1:22 PM
Kumbaya my lord...Kumbaya!!!
86. Posted by bigponie on April 19, 2006 1:23 PM
@#75
that's cause canada is hiding under the american flag, and when is the first or last time canada invaded anyone? hmmmm
87. Posted by The Mad Scientologist on April 19, 2006 1:23 PM
#75: FYI, this site is not meant for deep, hard-pressing political issues. It's sole purpose is to create an environment to textually pimp-smack turd-sniffing hosers like you who take themselves way too seriously.
88. Posted by BigJim on April 19, 2006 1:24 PM
#81 -- Michael Moore is an idiot, and so are you. An american idiot.
89. Posted by biatcho on April 19, 2006 1:24 PM
Big Jim: do you at all resemble the guy on the package of a roll of Brawny papertowels? I imagine you to have many red plaid flannel shirts & love maple syrup.
I'm a lumberjack and I'm OK...
90. Posted by oshkoshb-goshdammgosh on April 19, 2006 1:24 PM
84 - don't ask me. I guess Avril Lavigne is impervious to the effects of drugs. Or it has the opposite effect on her. Or Porcelina is 13 and doesn't know what cocaine is.
91. Posted by oshkoshb-goshdammgosh on April 19, 2006 1:26 PM
88 - Nothing validates a point more strongly than quoting Green Day. Wake me up when September ends...
92. Posted by Trotter on April 19, 2006 1:29 PM
75 & 77 - yeah, sure. And you didn't annihalate your aboriginal population... Hypocrites, those Canadiennes...
Oh, and "BigJim", I hear it's more like "SlimJim"...
93. Posted by BigJim on April 19, 2006 1:30 PM
#75 -- You certainly are a typically ethnocentric (We'll all wait while you go look that word up) american, having no knowledge of anything outside your own little corner of the world.
Canada has been involved in most UN sanctioned actions: Afganistan, First Gulf War, Korea etc. We also played a large role in both world wars. What we DON't condone is unilateral action by a wannabe world cop (Vietnam, Iraq#2).
No wonder the world hates you.
94. Posted by HappyTimeHarry on April 19, 2006 1:31 PM
#81, It amazes me you have a 12 year old niece, you can say what you want about the US i could give 2 fucks, its a celbrity gossip forum. The fact that you post more then anyone else on this forum and re-post if no one found your others funny just makes me realize that you drink more cock then Tom Cruise himself.
The Canucks on the board got real offended when i brought up hockey which made my day. The only thing canada offers to the world is great strip clubs.
95. Posted by oshkoshb-goshdammgosh on April 19, 2006 1:31 PM
I know that Michael Moore is an idiot, that was my point. You need to sharpen your sense of sarcasm or get out of the pool.
96. Posted by A Nobody on April 19, 2006 1:32 PM
Wow, her size looks exactly like mine. And I'm 14 years old. If only I had that bag...
97. Posted by mamacita on April 19, 2006 1:35 PM
@93
Hee hee. You just called yourself a typically ethnocentric american that has no knowledge of anything outside your own little corner of the world. I agree, no wonder the world hates you.
98. Posted by The Mad Scientologist on April 19, 2006 1:37 PM
In other news, please go to cnn.com if you want to discuss U.N. peace sanctions. Big Jim, are you seriously going to start an argument on this topic on a website with a pink desktop and features articles about Tom Cruise eating Katie Holmes' placenta? Big Jim eats the cock. There, I win! According to the parameters of this comment board this statement has you owned. Peace, you Canadian son-of-bitch.
99. Posted by mamacita on April 19, 2006 1:38 PM
@94
Uhhhh, OshKosh was being sarcastic. She IS from the US and was making fun of BigJim.
100. Posted by polypam on April 19, 2006 1:39 PM
She's a wreck-up-from-the-neck-up, she's a Monet, she's a butter-face! Hmmm. Still gotta love the very punk rock Fendi/ Gucci/ Prada/ LV bag she's carrying. And those yoga pants? ROCK ON!
101. Posted by oshkoshb-goshdammgosh on April 19, 2006 1:40 PM
"It amazes me you have a 12 year old niece,"
Okay...
"you can say what you want about the US i could give 2 fucks,"
It was sarcasm, but alright, kewl.
"its a celbrity gossip forum."
That's what I heard.
"The fact that you post more then anyone else on this forum and re-post if no one found your others funny just makes me realize that you drink more cock then Tom Cruise himself."
Yeah, I drink a lot of cock. If you've got something mean to say why don't you try making some rational connections between statements so you don't sound like a rambling idiot? Sure, I post a lot. Does that have something to do with what I said? No. Are you disagreeing with me, or just trying to pick a fight? Let me know and I'll see what I can do to help.
102. Posted by oshkoshb-goshdammgosh on April 19, 2006 1:42 PM
#93 - It's not polite to disagree with yourself.
103. Posted by BigJim on April 19, 2006 1:42 PM
Okay, I admit that I'm stupid. I referred to my own post. My bad. I'm also stupid for trying to teach you neanderthals anything besides cute acronyms like TCLTC.
Goodbye. I'm leaving for a board where the average IQ is higher than Forest Gump's.
And I still think Avril is hot.
104. Posted by The Mad Scientologist on April 19, 2006 1:44 PM
See ya later Mr. Belvedere
105. Posted by bigponie on April 19, 2006 1:44 PM
South Park's version of "kill canada" say's it all... nuff said
106. Posted by The Mad Scientologist on April 19, 2006 1:45 PM
See ya later Mr. Belvedere
107. Posted by HappyTimeHarry on April 19, 2006 1:45 PM
Actually no i read your post wrong, Im drinking Canadian Beer and Sowing a Red Leaf on my backpack so I was distracted. Either way I hate Canadians. You can have all your canadian music artists back too, they fucking suck.
108. Posted by oshkoshb-goshdammgosh on April 19, 2006 1:47 PM
BJLTC - durhurhurhur! I'm an american neanderthal! duh, oops! I wasn't supposed to know how to spell that, duh!
109. Posted by oshkoshb-goshdammgosh on April 19, 2006 1:48 PM
Their just jealous because of our big American penises.
110. Posted by biatcho on April 19, 2006 1:50 PM
100: If you're gonna try to talk like Cher from Clueless then at least get to know your designer handbags (it's a balenciaga and you can buy them for 20 bucks on Canal Street).
111. Posted by DaveBenner on April 19, 2006 1:50 PM
In response to #86, the last time Canada invaded anyone was when we participated in the world wars. Since then we managed to stay out of Nam and Iraq, both major military succesess for you, continue to be proud. The first time we invaded anyone was in the War of 1812, when we invaded America and BURNED DOWN THE WHITE HOUSE. Ha ha.
112. Posted by mamacita on April 19, 2006 1:54 PM
OshKosh
They're also jealous of our American-style jokes. At least, that's what Long Duck Dong told me.
BigJim
"Goodbye. I'm leaving for a board where the average IQ is higher than Forest Gump's."
Whatever, dude. You were so gonna leave anyway, because you have lots of seals to hunt, hockey to watch, beer to drink, and false-pretense invasions to not be involved in. Au revoir. And, yes, I pronounced that 'oh revore'.
113. Posted by CheekyChops on April 19, 2006 1:57 PM
Question: How does someone PASS OUT from being coked up?
Is this just something that happens in Canada? If so then perhaps Canadians are dumb enough to purchase ground up sleeping pills disguised as cocaine?
114. Posted by biatcho on April 19, 2006 1:57 PM
111 - Hi, My name is David Benner and there's nothing I love more than a good ol' smoked cock. In Canadia we have nothing better to do than sit around & chop down trees and suck on each others dicks whilst wearing ladies undergarments. We keep prostitution legal here just so's those darned Americans think we're cool, but we'd never think of having us any of that... that's what we got us lumberjacks for. And don't gotta pay for it either. Good ol' ass-fuckin' up here in Canadia. Sweet livin'!
115. Posted by oshkoshb-goshdammgosh on April 19, 2006 1:57 PM
That'd be located at averageIQ.com/forrestgump/forum
Check it out!
116. Posted by bigponie on April 19, 2006 1:58 PM
#111
ohh, i remember those wars, canada had what, maybe 1 or 2 guys in there big fuckin deal. If it weren't for the U.S. in the world war you'd be talkin japanese you canadian bacon bastard...
117. Posted by HappyTimeHarry on April 19, 2006 2:00 PM
http://img15.photobucket.com/albums/v45/Mr.Griffin2/canadasucks.png
Here is factual evidence.
118. Posted by CheekyChops on April 19, 2006 2:03 PM
http://www.pigdog.org/categories/canadia_sucks.html
More facts about those people up there.
119. Posted by ifrit239 on April 19, 2006 2:04 PM
#105 - The south park song is actually called "Blame Canada." If you are going to reference a song from a cartoon to make your point, then get it right. The irony? The makers are South Park are, in fact, Canadian. So now we have hockey, terrible pop singers, maple syrup annnnnnd cartoon artists.
120. Posted by CheekyChops on April 19, 2006 2:06 PM
from that link up there to Canadians:
P.S. If you guys keep mouthing off, one of these days we're gonna invade your sorry country and give you a serious ass-kicking.
121. Posted by jugsgirl on April 19, 2006 2:07 PM
hey happytimeharry -
did you get your cool maple leaf patch from canada in epcot too? I love that place, they have pastries called beaver tails.
america fuck yeah
122. Posted by bigponie on April 19, 2006 2:07 PM
kill canada has more of a zing, don't cha think.
123. Posted by CancerNipples on April 19, 2006 2:21 PM
Uh yeah, just the other day TS was calling this girl fat. Now suddenly like six days later, the girl give TS writer guy a boner? Give me a fucking break.
124. Posted by Italian Stallion on April 19, 2006 2:25 PM
I hear there are alot of Canadiens in Africa.....hehehehehehe
125. Posted by CancerNipples on April 19, 2006 2:26 PM
# 119 youre a fucking retard. The creators of South Park are both from Colorado. Canadian? You fucking moron.
126. Posted by CancerNipples on April 19, 2006 2:26 PM
# 119 youre a fucking retard. The creators of South Park are both from Colorado. Canadian? You fucking moron.
127. Posted by xAgonyxScenex on April 19, 2006 2:27 PM
ugh...the blonde hair looks horrible on her. Shes got a nice little butt though.
128. Posted by chiris on April 19, 2006 2:28 PM
Oh, Canada...
129. Posted by alexjanes on April 19, 2006 2:29 PM
two things
since when did she decide to look hot
and two, is she flying in that last picture? is it part of some deal she made with the canadian devil
130. Posted by alexjanes on April 19, 2006 2:30 PM
two things
since when did she decide to look hot
and two, is she flying in that last picture? is it part of some deal she made with the canadian devil
131. Posted by lurkerx on April 19, 2006 2:32 PM
I'd like to dip my dingus in red paint and draw a maple leaf on her hooters. I bet her legs go all the way back behind her head.
Course, she's one of those chicks that's going to age badly.
132. Posted by CancerNipples on April 19, 2006 2:35 PM
Well, her face already looks about ten years ahead of her body....
133. Posted by jugsgirl on April 19, 2006 2:36 PM
Cancernipples is correct ---- Matt and Trey belong to us!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trey_Parker
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Matt_Stone
america fuck yeah
134. Posted by tits_on_snack on April 19, 2006 2:37 PM
Having lived in both countries, I'd have to say Canada and the US are equally as stupid for different reasons, and equally as great for different reasons. Y'all stop fighting and get along now, ya hear, or I'll tie you all together with a skipping rope until you apologize to eachother like my dad used to do to me and my brother.
135. Posted by CancerNipples on April 19, 2006 2:38 PM
Seriously, this bitch looks like Tilda Swinton and always has. I don't see what it is about this pic that has so many of you retards popping wood.
136. Posted by CancerNipples on April 19, 2006 2:39 PM
133, I just think its hilarious that this halfwit posted to correct someone else and then in the same post was actually so freaking stupid as to claim matt stone and trey parker are canadians.
jesus curling christ
137. Posted by jugsgirl on April 19, 2006 2:43 PM
dumb canadians can't do anything right, even their bacon tastes funny.
138. Posted by DaveBenner on April 19, 2006 2:46 PM
Biatcho (#114), way to argue a factual political statement by questioning my sexual orintation. Lol, you sound like a baby. I think that all of us, Canadian and American alike, can agree that you represent the lowest common denominator. (A lumberjack diss? Jesus fucking christ . . . no comeback needed. Pathetic.)
139. Posted by BigJim on April 19, 2006 2:48 PM
#134 (I double checked to make sure I had the correct number this time).
You're right. I'm sorry. Peace?
140. Posted by jugsgirl on April 19, 2006 2:50 PM
So all canadians aren't lumberjacks?
141. Posted by poisonys on April 19, 2006 2:51 PM
So all Americans don't eat their baby's mama's placentas?
142. Posted by jugsgirl on April 19, 2006 2:52 PM
I'm really confused, if all canadians aren't lumberjacks, then who cuts down all the trees to make all the toilet paper that americans use?
143. Posted by CheekyChops on April 19, 2006 2:54 PM
124, did you happen to touch the side of your face when you said that?
144. Posted by CheekyChops on April 19, 2006 2:55 PM
124, did you happen to touch the side of your face when you said that?
145. Posted by Voracious on April 19, 2006 2:56 PM
I've always thought that she has such a nice face.
Her ass is definitely bubble-status. Hot.
146. Posted by neatokim on April 19, 2006 2:57 PM
Her hair is the color of a Twinkie. Gross.
147. Posted by Trotter on April 19, 2006 2:58 PM
Is a Skanky Midget a Skink? If so, Avril is a major Skink.
148. Posted by Iambananas on April 19, 2006 3:00 PM
Does she ever smile of have any facial expressions? She's ugly and weird looking.
149. Posted by Trotter on April 19, 2006 3:01 PM
139 - There go the Canadiennes, capitulating again. WIMP!
150. Posted by mrs.t on April 19, 2006 3:03 PM
I'm enjoying the visual of BigJim stomping away from his computer.......then running back minutes later to check the boards. AND apologize. Only a true Canadian pussy would call a truce like that.
'Merica Rules, ya HEARD?????
151. Posted by FriarTuck on April 19, 2006 3:07 PM
#124 just awesome, I am still giggling.
152. Posted by booface on April 19, 2006 3:09 PM
#93: Don't be so hard on yourself.
#141: That was funny.
Both America & Canada are so 1990's. All the cool people go to Namibia now. I should know, I live there and I'm a cool motherfucker.
This thread sucks, everyone's fighting and it's not even funny. Yes, I know my post isn't helping. Just sayin'. NEXT!
153. Posted by BigJim on April 19, 2006 3:09 PM
Does this mean ya'll don't wanna be friends? I'm so heartbroken. I'll go cry in my beer while I club a baby seal now.
154. Posted by booface on April 19, 2006 3:10 PM
Did anyone see MeghanHarris on Oprah yesterday?
155. Posted by CancerNipples on April 19, 2006 3:14 PM
There is no camel toe in those pictures, and Avril has also clearly bleached her hair.
Canadians really are proving themselves to be window-lickers in this thread.
156. Posted by scarlett138 on April 19, 2006 3:19 PM
WHY does Nicole Richie seem taller than Avril?
157. Posted by scarlett138 on April 19, 2006 3:19 PM
WHY does Nicole Richie seem taller than Avril?
158. Posted by scarlett138 on April 19, 2006 3:20 PM
WHY does Nicole Richie seem taller than Avril?
159. Posted by Bill Clinton on April 19, 2006 3:22 PM
Avril is hot and looks so much better without makeup.
Canadians love the cock.
Maybe I should post this two or three times to be like everyone else.
160. Posted by CancerNipples on April 19, 2006 3:25 PM
Uh Nicole Richie is barely 5 feet tall. Avril is around 5'2". It's not surprising that they appear similar in height. I think Avril prefers alcohol though (hence her need to "hit the gym") and we all know what Nicole likes...
If you want to get nit-picky, you can tell by the pics that Avril is not only a dog-faced hag, but also has a long torso which = shorter-looking legs. Nicole Richie has a shorter torso and therefore longer-looking legs
161. Posted by Binky on April 19, 2006 3:28 PM
These dumb debates are boring - but I thought I'd mention some of South Park's staff writers like Kyle McCulloch are Canadian. And US baseball team did lose to both Canada and Mexico...
And I'm not fat. (But I am 'big' of course)
162. Posted by Bill Clinton on April 19, 2006 3:29 PM
#160 Cancernipples - Are you trying to argue that Nicole is better looking than Avril? Good luck with that.
163. Posted by Binky on April 19, 2006 3:30 PM
These dumb debates are boring - but I thought I'd mention some of South Park's staff writers like Kyle McCulloch are Canadian. And US baseball team did lose to both Canada and Mexico...
And I'm not fat. (But I am 'big' of course)
164. Posted by Binky on April 19, 2006 3:32 PM
These double posts are boring. I only pressed once.
165. Posted by dimestoredetective on April 19, 2006 3:44 PM
Nice caboose.
I'd hit it.
Greek style.
166. Posted by bunnyhugger on April 19, 2006 3:44 PM
@ #82: i'm almost ashamed that i know this, but the flames came to canada after they couldn't cut it in the U.S.
and would somebody tell me who this girl is? man, i don't even bend that way, but that is one smokin' ass!
she has hair?
what?
167. Posted by biatcho on April 19, 2006 3:45 PM
138: I was actually just making fun of your name. The rest just kind of happened.
Fag.
168. Posted by jugsgirl on April 19, 2006 3:55 PM
ewwww someone put maple syrup all over my placenta. its all gooey now.
169. Posted by jugsgirl on April 19, 2006 3:56 PM
ewwww someone put maple syrup all over my placenta. its all gooey now.
170. Posted by biatcho on April 19, 2006 4:04 PM
Fucking hell BigJim - momma told you to keep your maple syrup out of other peoples placentas! Lazy, dumbass CanadiAns.
171. Posted by krisdylee on April 19, 2006 4:08 PM
Wait, guys, enuff about the canadian/american bullshit. Let's twist up a fattie of BC bud, have a toke and sing a song about tom lovin' the cock. although it's kinda cold up here in the igloo, don't worry though, i have enough whale blubber and lumberjackets to go around. eh.
172. Posted by krisdylee on April 19, 2006 4:12 PM
ah, fuck, i'll try my post again, and if it doubles up, i really don't care.
Enough bullshit about the canadian/american bullshit. let's twist up a fat one (bc bud) my treat, sing some cock-lovin' tom songs, and rip on meganharris. although it IS cold in the igloo, but don't worry, plenty of fresh seal meat and lumberjackets to go around.
173. Posted by krisdylee on April 19, 2006 4:12 PM
ah, fuck, i'll try my post again, and if it doubles up, i really don't care.
Enough bullshit about the canadian/american bullshit. let's twist up a fat one (bc bud) my treat, sing some cock-lovin' tom songs, and rip on meganharris. although it IS cold in the igloo, but don't worry, plenty of fresh seal meat and lumberjackets to go around.
174. Posted by ATX on April 19, 2006 4:23 PM
All of you would hit that shit if it were in front of you...posers!
175. Posted by Trotter on April 19, 2006 4:29 PM
Whoa, Krisdylee, you must've already been draggin that J, you're pretty kind today.
Here, let me pass you some muk tuk. Just don't share with MeganHarris, it was her ass I cut it off.
176. Posted by hotterthanyou on April 19, 2006 4:35 PM
#56 - i was just gonna mention the LULULEMONS. i have the same pair. they just opened a new store in Chicago, aside from their stores in Vancouver, California and Ontario.
177. Posted by DaveBenner on April 19, 2006 4:53 PM
Hey Biatcho (#167), I appreciate the capitulation. However, calling me a fag afterwards? Way to save face. I love it when people make fun of themselves without being in on the joke.
178. Posted by Binky on April 19, 2006 4:59 PM
I noticed she was wearing a hair scrunchie from Shopper's Drug Mart.
179. Posted by The Word on April 19, 2006 5:01 PM
I'd hit it
180. Posted by The Word on April 19, 2006 5:02 PM
I'd hit it
181. Posted by Italian Stallion on April 19, 2006 5:02 PM
CheekyChops.....to answer your question, SI......
182. Posted by poisonys on April 19, 2006 5:04 PM
#176- Yeah, they have stores in Calgary and Saskatoon (where I'm from) too. I love them.
183. Posted by Siren5864 on April 19, 2006 5:14 PM
HEY! LESS fucking "thread-fighting" and MORE of what you you want to dunk Avril in and if/when you want to eat her afterwards.
Fightening with each other = boring for everyone else
Saying horrible things about some Canadian girl we don't really know = Superficial entertainment galore!!
Post this on your desktop if you're prone to forgetfulness.
184. Posted by mamacita on April 19, 2006 5:32 PM
@183
"Fightening with each other = boring for everyone else"
First off, what's fightening? Secondly, fighting with each other is way more fun than looking at pictures of Avril Lavigne being tiny and running in the rain.
185. Posted by Trotter on April 19, 2006 5:40 PM
I'd like to see Avril tiny and running in acid rain.
186. Posted by CancerNipples on April 19, 2006 5:43 PM
Stop trying to claim South Park as your own, you hoser fags.
It is Trey Parker's show. He is the principle writer of every show. He is the DIRECTOR of every show, he does all the music, on and on and on.
And the man is all American. So shut the fuck up canadians. South Park is all-american. They make it perfectly clear that candians are a joke. They don't hate canadians, and niether do I, but they realize you guys are fucking stupid and meant to be laughed at.
187. Posted by CancerNipples on April 19, 2006 5:46 PM
If you don't get that canadians are a fucking joke, then you must have missed every godamn episode featuring terrence and phillip.
You people really need to shut the hell up about south park, especially since you are so ignorant about it, and think it's a "canadian" show, idiotic window lickers.
188. Posted by Jacq on April 19, 2006 6:00 PM
#79 - I've got pheromones out the yin-yang, so I get a lot of that. Come on over 'n hump it. I'm open, but I am really tired of the smell of burning pubes. You do have pubes right? I like 'em young but not too young.
Crap, I can't find it now, but whoever was disagreeing with themself is MeganHarris. Nevermind, it was poster #93. BigJim. Tool.
BigJim + MeganHarris = Suri Part II
189. Posted by Binky on April 19, 2006 6:02 PM
#187 Actually - I think South Park usually sucks and didn't know it was still on. Claim away. I thought World Police blew totally. (Although I have dated puppets - talk about a woody)
The point the commenters were trying to point out was there are Canadian references on shows like South Park and The Simpson's only because there are Canadians on staff. So 'Blame Canada' for some of the self abuse ...hummm...
190. Posted by Jacq on April 19, 2006 6:03 PM
#79 - I've got pheromones out the yin-yang, so I get a lot of that. Come on over 'n hump it. I'm open, but I am really tired of the smell of burning pubes. You do have pubes right? I like 'em young but not too young.
Crap, I can't find it now, but whoever was disagreeing with themself is MeganHarris. Nevermind, it was poster #93. BigJim. Tool.
BigJim + MeganHarris = Suri Part II
191. Posted by BigJim on April 19, 2006 6:05 PM
Yeah, Matt and Trey just love to poke fun at Canadians, but they would never do it to their own country.
After all, Team America made you guys look so cool. Fuck ya!
192. Posted by Jacq on April 19, 2006 6:08 PM
#183 - Fightening is like having Tourrets (sp?) and punching yourself in the head, but with no excuse right?
193. Posted by biatcho on April 19, 2006 6:10 PM
177 (& 111 for that matter): DavidBenner, why do you want to burn down the White House? In our fair land of ours (THE U S of A)we have laws against such behavior. In fact I can have your ass arrested right now for even just uttering those sentiments. I know that in Canadia you don't have "laws & regulations" because you're a barbaric, savage, yet super-faggy breed of people. But for your sake & the sake of the baby Jesus (he's CanadiAn too, right, or why else would he always show up on South Park??)shut your filthy, cumguzzling mouth. Terrorist.
194. Posted by biatcho on April 19, 2006 6:17 PM
FagJim: I like to poke things at CanadiAns too. It's called a piping hot steel rod right into the anus of every living breathing Canadian who uses the term "poke fun at".
And it's Fuck YEAH... Not Fuck Ya... we don't all live in Fargo (which is close to Canadia and explains why they talk weird & all. EH.)
195. Posted by OhHowCynical on April 19, 2006 6:18 PM
Ha! She's a munchkin!
196. Posted by biatcho on April 19, 2006 6:19 PM
FagJim: I like to poke things at CanadiAns too. It's called a piping hot steel rod right into the anus of every living breathing Canadian who uses the term "poke fun at".
And it's Fuck YEAH... Not Fuck Ya... we don't all live in Fargo (which is close to Canadia and explains why they talk weird & all. EH.)
197. Posted by BigJim on April 19, 2006 6:19 PM
Top Ten Reasons why america Sucks:
10. Because americans love the cock.
9. Because they have capital punishment, but they only execute poor people.
8. Because white america spends most of its time worried about how to keep black american men from having sex with their white women.
7. Because they elected a president who couldn’t outwit a house plant.
6. Because they like going to war for no damn good reason.
5. Because they’re so concerned with all that keeping up with the Jones bullshit.
4. Because they’re fat.
3. Because they feel entitled.
2. Because they have to send their kids to private school.
1. Because it gave birth to Paris Hilton.
198. Posted by oshkoshb-goshdammgosh on April 19, 2006 6:20 PM
BigJim is back and he's got stuff to say! Stuff, I tell you!
The handicap of the Canadian people is they lack all sense of Irony and Sarcasm, leaving them impotent and confused when it comes to humor.
Watch BigJim the Lumberjack spin rapidly in his desk chair while pouring maple syrup on his head and twiddling his lips like Daffy Duck when I tell him this : we get it that South Park mocks and criticizes not only other cultures and nationalties, but ours, too. Apply this to everything we've said about Canada above, and pull that giant maple leaf out of your balloon knot. If I took myself as seriously as you do I'd be at a jeweler right now getting my genitals encrusted with diamonds. But I already did that yesterday.
199. Posted by oshkoshb-goshdammgosh on April 19, 2006 6:27 PM
Me and Paris Hilton were out the other day looking for some cock when we felt entitled to kill some poor people. We had already dropped the kids off at Our Lady of Fatima private school for rich people, so we decided to eat and not exercise, because we are fat. Meanwhile the Jones' were trying to figure out a way to keep the black men from having sex with our white women, but we weren't about to be outdone by them! So, we started a war for no damn good reason, and placed the blame on our idiotic president, whom we all love and worship although he just couldn't outwit that pesky houseplant.
200. Posted by oshkoshb-goshdammgosh on April 19, 2006 6:31 PM
200! I'm awesome!
201. Posted by BigJim on April 19, 2006 6:31 PM
oshkoshb-goshdammgosh:
Bike racks at 3:00 tomorrow?
202. Posted by biatcho on April 19, 2006 6:34 PM
In America we call out other high school students to a fight by meeting in the "parking lot" not at the bike racks. Whoever rode a bike to school was a loser!
BigJim roade a bike to school!!!
203. Posted by NoraBalora on April 19, 2006 6:41 PM
she definitely used to have huge nungas, what happened?
204. Posted by krisdylee on April 19, 2006 6:47 PM
pass the seal meat, man
205. Posted by krisdylee on April 19, 2006 6:51 PM
hey BigJim, eat some poutine, put on your mukluks and hockey helmut, drive your skidoo off the iceberg man, cuz you are pissing me off.
206. Posted by cibby on April 19, 2006 6:55 PM
krisdylee: I'm Canadian, and I, too, think BigJim should drive a snowmobile off an iceberg. Leave the maple syrup for the rest of us!
207. Posted by Jacq on April 19, 2006 7:07 PM
#202 - Actually, I think he rode the short bus. I guess in Canadia they just call it "the bus". Get it? Canadiens are so dumb that they don't have long buses.
BigJim, while I'm talking about you I'm going to pick out a few things that are wrong with what you said.
10. Just because Tom Cruise is American and loves the cock doesn't mean that all Americans love the cock. Not all Germans were Nazis, but most of them did feel like Nazi Germany.
9. If we're executing the poor, get in line motherfucker. You're next. Plus, everyone hates poor people, they get in the way.
8. I'll bet you're mad because you're black and you want to give a white woman a pounding worse than MeganHarris wants to eat a donut. Which is pretty bad.
7. Sure, he's a half-wit, but white Republicans are still in control, right?
6. You must have missed the memo, but we're the world police. Plus, our way of doing things is better than anyone else's.
5. That's just fine if you're the Joneses.
4. When I see a fat person, I just keep walking. There's no way that a fat person is worth anybody's time. Plus, fat people also get in the way.
3. We ARE entitled.
2. You may want to google it, but there are private schools (and boarding schools) all over the world.
1. No. Kathy Hilton gave birth to Paris and Paris, in turn, gave her herpes. They're even but we owe Kathy one.
Oh, I just realized that everything in your post was wrong. Shut the fuck up. Sit and spin. Or in the words of Rob Zombie - Up yours bay-be.
208. Posted by Binky on April 19, 2006 7:09 PM
IQ scares people BigJim. Lay low.
(I thought kris was pretending to be Canadian for a while) (...ie same person = many names)
(Notice how some 'posters' switch from being M to F - i don't really get why, but will try not to lose sleep over it)
(too many brackets Binky)
Oh - I'm not an Avril fan, but I did like her song...'Constipated'. And she's looking gr8 ! ( Hope it's not just because of that guy from Oshawa)
209. Posted by biatcho on April 19, 2006 7:13 PM
207: Instead of "short bus" I much prefer "Tard Cart".
210. Posted by biatcho on April 19, 2006 7:17 PM
Binky: people switch from male to female to hermaphrodite to aids infected lesbians in the hopes that others, such as yourself, will get confused, shrivel up & die, never to be heard from again. Get the hint...
211. Posted by BigJim on April 19, 2006 7:20 PM
Allah Akbar!
Since I disagree with you, I must be a terrorist. Otherwise you wouldn't all be so pissed off.
Please, oh, please don't send a stealth bomber to take out me, my family, and all my neighbors.
212. Posted by snookyookums on April 19, 2006 7:20 PM
Love America
Love Canada
HATE THAT PURSE.
213. Posted by Binky on April 19, 2006 7:20 PM
LOL - Binky is such a prick !!
214. Posted by biatcho on April 19, 2006 7:25 PM
Binky, if you were a prick you would at least be respected. You're just lame. And boring. And gay. Which inevitably means you're CanadiAn, the worst of all!
215. Posted by HughJorganthethird on April 19, 2006 7:32 PM
It's nice they let her drive a big girl car. How did I not know she was this small? Are everyone else in her videos secretly midgets?
216. Posted by mamacita on April 19, 2006 7:57 PM
Funny thing. I looked up Canadian in the Urban Dictionary and here are a couple of the definitions that I found:
A citizen of Canada or Michigan; a Pansy
Hockey playing, syrup loving, bacon eating, french speaking, funny talking people who live in igloos.
To be fair, here are some of the nice ones too:
Somebody from the country north of the United States, which has: Maple Syrup; Hockey; Universal Healthcare; Peace; Low Crime/Violence Rates; Excellent Donuts and Coffee (AKA Tim Horton's); Better, Cheaper Beer; Lovely Women; Nicer People;
Better Winter Sports; Cultural Tolerance; Good/Cheap Education; Superior Genitalia.
OK, well, there was only one nice one so there it is. In closing, I'd like to add that BigJim is lame, Binky is being kind of an asshole today, and I'm sick of talking about maple syrup. It gives my nephew the most rancid gas ever. Worse than cabbage farts.
217. Posted by krisdylee on April 19, 2006 8:08 PM
I'll clear up the nationality for yah...
Meet you at the Ruby in Dog River and I'll let you know.
218. Posted by elvindeath on April 19, 2006 8:26 PM
I'm not sure what the confusion is. I'd hit that so hard she'd look like a baby burping up milk for the next decade. Yes she sucks. Yes she's hot. Luckily my penis does not have it's own iTunes account, and therefore cannot contribute to her economic success.
219. Posted by Trotter on April 19, 2006 8:43 PM
@207 Jacq, you made me blow my load. Twice. We'll have to work on your opening tomorrow. Oh, I'm over 12 alright, too. Damn. Now I'm gettin wood again. Better watch out for those faggy lumberjack canadiennes. I hear they'll cut through this wood with their teeth!
220. Posted by LittleWatson on April 19, 2006 9:07 PM
DaveBenner- don't take it personally because Biatcho can't really come up with anything good to say and she makes fag/small penis comments. She is a lazy lesbian.
221. Posted by Binky on April 19, 2006 9:14 PM
Ok...I've been a bit bitchy and things haven't really been the same - ever since Ryan shaved. (not that I've ever seen the show)
We Canadians are moronic, commie, frozen, french kissing, hockey stick-swinging, free health care cripplin', gun controllin', silent America invadin' weirdos.
But # 216 you forgot #5 in the Urban Dick.
As I've said before some Canadians are getting lippy because of George Clooney movies and the doc 'Why We Fight'
Oh well - there's always 'Eskimo Pies'
222. Posted by mamacita on April 19, 2006 9:33 PM
@221
That's okay. I've also been bitchy, but it's because ning-ning no give me my green card even though I give heem my fifty dolla.
223. Posted by biatcho on April 19, 2006 9:41 PM
That's OK DavidBenner. You & LittleWatson are made for each other. You're both from disgusting filth holes that should be blown to bits so we can all start over again... Canadia & New Jersey. (For anyone who is interested in seeing just how witty LittleWatson is please check out the last 27 posts regarding Scarlet Johannsen).
She has a penis growing out of her armpit.
I shit you not.
224. Posted by biatcho on April 19, 2006 9:43 PM
Correction: LittleWatson has the penis in said armpit, not SJ.
225. Posted by biatcho on April 19, 2006 9:43 PM
oy yeah - fag!
226. Posted by Drunk Blogger on April 19, 2006 9:47 PM
I once had sex with Avril Lavigne at a concert in Phoenix for 101.5 the Zone while she was really high and eating 2 big bags of Dorito's. True story, I think, but I was pretty drunk.
227. Posted by LittleWatson on April 19, 2006 9:52 PM
#223: don't make you rape you with my penis armpit.
228. Posted by LittleWatson on April 19, 2006 9:52 PM
Sorry, meant to say don't make ME rape you...
229. Posted by biatcho on April 19, 2006 10:00 PM
227 & 228 What do you think I am some sort of fat lesbian like you? Freak...
(personally 227 is the funniest post you've had to date)
230. Posted by LittleWatson on April 19, 2006 10:06 PM
Thanks Biatcho. I'm working on it.
231. Posted by Trotter on April 19, 2006 10:48 PM
@230 I've got something for you to work on and its Avrils tiny little hole.
232. Posted by evelyn on April 20, 2006 12:09 AM
she has really cleaned up!!!!!
http://static.sky.com/images/pictures/1345422.jpg
233. Posted by BarryBonds on April 20, 2006 12:11 AM
#116 Dont really want to talk politics on the superficial but Russia did most of the work in World War II, remember the US came in later. Russia lost a lot of soldiers (the most actually) and held of German soldiers from taking over their territory.
234. Posted by gogoboots on April 20, 2006 12:30 AM
she has to go the gym? yeah right, she has a little tiny body and a little poofy stomach from chugging vodka all nite, big deal!
235. Posted by Binky on April 20, 2006 12:38 AM
# 233 errr...
Don't really want to talk baseball either Barry. But you're right.
236. Posted by Jayne on April 20, 2006 1:58 AM
I adore her ass.
237. Posted by Italian Stallion on April 20, 2006 3:45 AM
I'm drunk, but satandammnit right in the motherfuckin butt................
238. Posted by Italian Stallion on April 20, 2006 9:48 AM
I would love to know what the fuck I was trying to say last night because I have no Idea.............
239. Posted by mamacita on April 20, 2006 10:15 AM
@238
I think you were trying to be respectful by saying "satandammnit" instead of "goddammit"
As in, "Goddammit (I'd fuck her) right in the motherfuckin butt"--------or something like that.
My cousin was extra drunk over the weekend and said really loud (to her brother) "Daniel, you're such a drip!". Like, when's the last time anyone called someone a 'drip'? Maybe in the Babysitters Club books? I told her that and she just laughed hysterically and then fell over on the couch. Drunk people are fun.
240. Posted by purplepuppy on April 20, 2006 10:22 AM
Cute figure, but what's with the sour puss Avril? Finally realized having hair and skin that's all the same colour isn't a very flattering look?
241. Posted by oshkoshb-goshdammgosh on April 20, 2006 10:24 AM
238 - this is the Altavista.com Babel Fish translation of what you said from Drunk to English:
I would like to have rigorous anal intercourse with the upstanding woman in the photograph if only I could maneuver my unit into her miniscule orifice. I would also like her to weep and scream while I penetrated her thus.
Sometimes those translations are kind of botched but you get the idea.
242. Posted by oshkoshb-goshdammgosh on April 20, 2006 10:37 AM
Sometimes I masterbate to "My Super Sweet 16". Is that wrong?
243. Posted by mamacita on April 20, 2006 10:49 AM
@242
Yes, it is. Masturbate isn't spelled like 'masterbate'...so yes, it's wrong. Very wrong. You suck. But, you're still a fat lesbian, which means we're comrades. LOLSOMLOLSOMLOLSOMLOLSOM!!!!!!!
P.S. I just created a new internet acronym lingo thingy-SOM means Shitting On Myself, as in I'm Laughing Out Loud and you're so funny that I'm SHITTING ON MYSELF!!!!!!!!!!! I command you to use it from now on.
244. Posted by Trotter on April 20, 2006 11:03 AM
@243
SOM right now.
245. Posted by oshkoshb-goshdammgosh on April 20, 2006 11:07 AM
243 - maybe when other people do it it's "masturbate", but when I do it I "masterbait", as in, I can put ten worms on a hook. It feels good. SOM.
246. Posted by mamacita on April 20, 2006 11:14 AM
@245
I prefer crickets. They make that sweet chirping sound and they rub their legs together. This makes no sense at all.
OMG!!! SOM!!!!!!!
247. Posted by oshkoshb-goshdammgosh on April 20, 2006 11:27 AM
Sometimes I rub my legs together and chirp when I watch "Nanny 911". Is that weird? SOM R. Kelly style.
248. Posted by Italian Stallion on April 20, 2006 11:45 AM
#239 you are so correct, and I honestly didn't know what the fuck I meant, but it all makes sense now, seriously!!!!
Ok, so I went to the Oriole game last night and everytime this guy from the Indians got up I would scream his last name right before the pitcher would pitch. Picture this.....SIZEMORE...SIZEMORE....you know like in a taunting way. So anyway my bestfriend calls me up and says "Stallion are you at the game?" and I was like yes how did you know? "Because Everytime this dude is up I can hear your drunk ass voice yelling SIZEMORE........Totally made my night........The only thing I felt bad about was a couple sitting in front of me brought their twin new borns and they switched seats, no lie, like 5 times.....And then I thought to myself, what a wonderful world...heheheheh still drunk I meant to say I thought fuck them, don't bring Babies to the fucking game.....It's dangerous.....hehehehehhe
249. Posted by Italian Stallion on April 20, 2006 11:47 AM
Oh yea, true story, not trying to be funny there.......I know, I know, when Am I funny, right?
250. Posted by mamacita on April 20, 2006 11:50 AM
@248
So, your friends actually call you Stallion? That RULES!!! I'm going to start making all my friends call me "Mamacita Ay Ay Ay!!!!! Caliente!!!" and I will not answer unless they say the entire thing. Oh wait. I have no friends. So, seriously, what were you drinking that you could still be drunk right now? Did you have Pine-Sol martinis or some shit?