Mar 23 2006Isaac Hayes back stabbed by Scientology

isaac-hayes-stroke.jpgFox News reported awhile ago that Isaac Hayes didn't quit South Park and never issued the press release saying he was offended by their Scientology episode, but rather left the show after suffering a stroke. Now Page Six is claiming the press release was actually put out by other Scientologists, saying:

That release was put out by fellow Scientologist Christina "Kumi" Kimball, a fashion executive for designer Craig Taylor. According to foxnews.com, "Hayes loves 'South Park' and needs it for income. He has a new wife and a baby on the way."

It's surprising Scientologists haven't kidnapped the President and blown up a box full of kittens yet. Looking at the way they conduct their public relations, their next step should be reworking their name into an acronym that spells out H.A.T.E. and maybe trying to launch a nuclear strike against all the promoters of freedom and democracy.

UPDATE: If you missed last night's episode of South Park featuring the return of Chef, you can check out a clip here.

*UPDATE: Isaac Hayes was on the Opie & Anthony Show in December last year and openly said that he had no problem with the way Matt and Trey handled the Scientology episode. You can listen to the clip here.

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First Post! Bwaa haa!
Another example of how crazy these Scientologists are.

ok, will believe Isaac's version that CoS issued that statement without his knowledge or consent, but if Isaac does not quit Scientology *now*, then that is his own tough $h!+.

Anyone catch South Park last night?

Not sure if it was new or not, but last nights S.P. episode had chef getting kidnapped killed by a "club" that he was brainwashed into joining. eerie.

Ok what the hell is going on?? There is basic info that's missing here, and someone needs to clear it up!!

a) Is he in hospital or is he not in hospital?
b) Did he quit the show or not?
c) Did he write the damn release or not?

IF he didn't why the hell wouldn't someone in his camp speak out sooner if he was unable to himself???

So many questions...............

not to mention he chose to go back after the kids pleaded for him not to... then he fell onto a friggin' pointy rock and got torn apart by a mountain lion and a bear... that's rough, yo...

if he didn't quit... then that was one hell of an episode... made me cry a bit... i loved chef... :(

I think it's time we kill the Scientologists.

He's just been stroking his salty balls a little too often.

#3

It was Episode 1 of the 10th season... I loved the "cut and paste" voice clips.

Forget Luke Wilson, I think Isaac Hayes should play Bobby Ewing in the new Dallas movie.

*Isaac Hayes announces to press he's offended by South Park Scientology episode, leaves the show, media uproar ensues, Ton Cruise goes apeshit, Mattt & Trey fight back, Isaac says he actually had a stroke, never issued a press release on leaving, gets booted from the show anyway, all down to one wacky fashion-designing Scientologist"

And then everyone wakes up and it was all just a dream...

wtf? did he quit or not? did he have a stroke or not?

Friggin' hilarious.

Poster 4; the reason we're not hearing anything from Isaac is because he's being tightly controlled by a Scientologist "minder" right now. As is Katie Holmes; nobody ever gets a word with her anymore without her "minder" being present. With the current media attention to South Park and Isaac, I'm sure the Scientologists are all over the man right now. I hope Matt and Trey devote the entire damn season of South Park to exposing Scientology.

When will they all wear Nikes and drink the juice? Surely its time.

total bullspit —> where are hayes and his peeps on this? if he needed the cash so bad, someone somewhere would be throwing a friggin' fit --> out loud and in public. and the Southpark peeps would be leading the charge on this one....

I think we're taking our eyes off of the real threat here, folks:

Thetans. And, and Xenu.

Seriously, let's nuke the bastards.

If they can prove the church was behind it, BOTH South Park AND Hayes have a nice fat lawsuit against them, Oh God, PLEASE let the church have been behind it. Oh yeah, Tom Cruise loves the cock.

essh scientology this , scientology that - there like the new paris hilton!!

Forget the wife and baby, I bet Hayes needs the money to reach level 14. It probably costs like a million dollars or something.

BTW I found it ironic that someone named "Christina" is a Scientologist. That is all.

Damn it you bastards, why not show the whole thing? I don;t have a TV. I had to sell all my things so I could buy a computer, which then got stolen, so I had to kill hobos, steal their organs.......I mean..that was funny.

hafa you steal organs too?? i have a friend that does that....

bunch of crap, hayes quit cause of scientology; "we made the scientology episode thinking, this might make isaac hayes quit, and sure enough, he did" from trey and matt's interview on letterman
http://www.devilducky.com/media/43368/

It's a shame the Scientologists weren't around when the Romans were feeding people to lions.

It's too bad the South Park episode didn't include a comment about the king of all "Super Adventurers" living in Bahrain. That would have been funny.

this is freaking bizarro, I'm speechless, you can't make this shit up folks, you just can't.

So chef got killed off in this episode? How sad, too bad cause he was the only character to bring diversity to the show. Now it probably will be so vanilla.

See, I know he had a sense of humor, Scientologists however, are still fucking WACKO!

#26: are you OOYFM?? "..only character to bring diversity....so vanilla".

It's effin SP.

Between the rightous superficial and some of these posts I laugh myself stupid. Wait, I am stupid, so I laugh my self....whatever.

they still have tolkein.

I believe the whole thing was a publicity stunt by a couple of hack cartoonists. I've seen and heard several interviews with Issac Hayes and he's never said anything against SP.

He had some health problems in January and a mysterious "statement" is released with a derogatory quote from the cartoonist already attached. Everyone just repeats the same snippet and as far as I know, nobody has seen or posted the entire statement.

Then, there's some nonsense about Tom Cruise and everything is perfectly timed to happen days before the release of Season 7 on DVD and the season premier, which happens to have a "bye Chef, anti-scientology theme". From all reports, the mysterios statement was released on the 13th; What? Does anyone believe they put together Wednesday's entire episode in a week?

This doesn't explain why the hell Matt and Trey said what they said!!! Who is hiding what? And really, do I fucking care????

"What? Does anyone believe they put together Wednesday's entire episode in a week?"

Actually, 6 days... they need a day to ship to broadcasters.

Uh, it's widely well know that they put most episdoes together in four to six days- Which is how they are able to do so many satirical episodes on current events.

I heard that next week's episode has already been completed and it is about post #30 in this thread.

Scientologists killed JFK!!!

discreet_chaos (post #30)

South Park episodes are usually compiled within about 4 days and sumbitted to Comedy Central about a day before they air. That is why they are able to have such up-to-date information. For example, the 'Christmas in Canada' episode portrayed Saddam in his spider hole within days of the acctual event.

Who did the voice at the end? Trey?

Who did the voice at the end? Trey?

The guy who did the voice of Darth Maul, Peter Serafinowicz, did the Darth Chef voice.

I don't get any of this, but I do know that scientology is totally true. I feel sorry for those of you who haven't secured your high rank in the system. The shit is going to be bad for you when it comes...

This is just straight fucked up.

God I love these guys. Trey Parker and Matt Stone are just awsome. Kudos to them all the way. This is something from the "Scientology kills" website. I thought it was funny. I want to make a shirt that says "Hail Xenu!" who's with me?

While the "South Park" creators didn't directly comment on Comedy Central's decision to pull the episode, they issued an unusual statement to Daily Variety indicating the battle is not over. "So, Scientology, you may have won THIS battle, but the million-year war for earth has just begun! Temporarily anozinizing our episode will NOT stop us from keeping Thetans forever trapped in your pitiful man-bodies. Curses and drat! You have obstructed us for now, but your feeble bid to save humanity will fail! Hail Xenu!!!"

The duo signed the statement "Trey Parker and Matt Stone, servants of the dark lord Xenu."

http://www.scientology-kills.org/celebrities/cruise_news.htm

I don't know, if they wrote the sentence from the "statement" nobody has seen, or if Page 6 is correct and it was written by the LRons. I do know that the Parker & Stone have shown no loyalty to someone that they worked with for years and other than possibly themselves, the person who put in the most appearances promoting their show.

I also find it interesting that SP fans are willing to take the implied info from the cartoonists, innuendo and stuff being whispered around the blogosphere at face value, while they're refusing to accept any denials or information from any other source.

I haven't regularly watched South Park, since it stopped being funny and I have no feelings about scientology. I am a longtime fan of Issac Hayes and I guess you could also say, I believe in truth and fair play.

Take the test. It's insane:
http://www.scientology.org/oca.htm

I went to the scientology website and took the free personality test. They say it has a value of "$500 and up." Shit, if you'll believe THAT, you're ripe for the whole deal. Don't fill in the info form at the start with your own real info.

They REALLY DO ask the questions Stan got asked. Basically, the test is a set-up. It exposes all our collective NORMAL foibles, and labels all as "depressed." You are given a graph of your test, but not the final results. You are directed to the nearest Scientology centre to get your results from a genuine madma–––er, I mean Scientologist.

From there, the E-meter (a hoax exposed in TIME magazine yearrrs ago), the fees, and the levels begin.

It's very evil and sad. I pity a cool guy like Hayes getting involved with this nonsense.

At least all you need to practice Christianity is a cheap bible and the willingness to do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

My post rocks. I think I'll paste it whenever this shit comes up again.

Fuck Chef. I hope he never makes another cent off the south park name.
Hypocritical (Racial expletive)!!!!!!!

#43 Discreet Chaos...

No, what they did is take a has been with no career and give him a roll on one of the highest rated Cable shows on TV. During that time he participates when they bash every other religeon out there, then bolts when they bash his. As for who showed loyalty It sure as hell wasn't him.....and Tom Cruise loves the cock.

Hey that clip wasn't the whole episode, WTF?!?

#44, your post does rule. Want me to read your palm for $500?
BTW, I read an article on Scientology in Rolling Stone (yeah....what?) and it was deeply disturbing. People who want to quit being a Scientologist end up losing their entire families. Aliens have always scared me.

Bombard this person. Scientology is truly evil as is she.

http://www.our-home.org/christinakumikimball/

#46 Spindoc

Issac Hayes has worked steadily since the early 70s and he took a one-off appearance on South Park and turned it into a multiyear gig. He's also won numerous awards, including two Oscars, two Golden Globes, a Grammy and a Screen Actors Guild.

Matt Stone has only done a couple of things, other than South Park and has been the proud recipient of a Cable ACE and a Annie. If he really did receive a resignation letter that used the reported phrasing, he didn't have to call the media and make a remark about cashing checks, he could've just cited creative differences.

I still don't know, whether or not a statement exists and Page 6 may be right and an LRon may have put something together; But, it's the cartoonists and their unquenchable desire for publicity that have turned this into a big deal. There has been no argument that Mr Hayes has had some health problems and he is 63 years old. He has released no public statements or made any recent appearances, it's the cartoonists that have been riding it for all it's worth.

God, this shit is Amway without the cleaning products!

Ii laughed so hard at that episode I almost pissed myself. Almost being a relitive term of course. The use of old Chef clips comlpetely out of context was fucking hilarious. America? fuck yeah!

#50 Discreet Chaos......YEs, Issac won all of those, in the 70's. He hasn't been doing anything lately other than South Park, as you know.

Spindoc: IMDB begs to differ.
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0005002/

First, I find it really surprising that some crazy Scientologist doesn't get in here with the fire and brimstone about the thetans we're loaded with - and threaten to su for disparaging their "religion". Second, did the episode imply that Scientologists are child molesters or did they just kill Chef in a show for Isaac Hayes? Third, the voice clips were downright funny. I hope that the new lunch lady is the old bus driver.

#48, Lebowski: Thank you sir. I only wish I had've included your "read my palm for $500," in it :)

I don't think we've heard the last of this, but as for Matt and Trey riding publicity? Who released the original press release, and why hasn't Hayes refuted it yet?

Matt and Trey are on OUR side, folks. Remember what they did to Paris Hilton.

#48, Lebowski: Thank you sir. I only wish I had've included your "read my palm for $500," in it :)

I don't think we've heard the last of this, but as for Matt and Trey riding publicity? Who released the original press release, and why hasn't Hayes refuted it yet?

Matt and Trey are on OUR side, folks. Remember what they did to Paris Hilton.

I also find it interesting that SP fans are willing to take the implied info from the cartoonists, innuendo and stuff being whispered around the blogosphere at face value, while they're refusing to accept any denials or information from any other source.

I *only* accept the implied info from the cartoonists, innuendo and stuff being whispered around the blogosphere at face value and absolutely refuse to accept any denials or information from any other source. That is, unless it ends with the line "and Tom Cruise loves the cock"

Ahhhhh! I just watched the clip.. what's the secret!?! I hate living in Canada where we have to wait until Friday nite for new episodes.

i've been a little sad for most of the day. but just now, i thought of a nice-sized mob of people, outside the delivery room on the day/time katie holmes goes into labor, yelling "shut your fucking face, uncle fucka!" that made me smile.
but just for a second.

Sorry about the double post :(

I went here:
http://www.our-home.org/christinakumikimball/

Uccch! These scientology people are SICK!

It's easy to blame Scientology. They are all CRAZY, after all. But I recently heard that Tom Cruise ate soup immediately before the COUCH JUMPING incident on Oprah. I'm inclined to believe that this may be related to his wild antics and lack of common sense! On the other hand, his Scientology beliefs may have led him to it in the first place. Any thoughts?

We need to invite ALL scientologists to the bloodbath premire of Wonder Woman starring Lindsey Hohan. They'll never see it coming...

Being a listener to Opie and Anthony, i recall listening to the Isaac Hayes interview in december, on my way home from a weekend out of town...so my first thought when I heard the press release of him leaving, i thought 2 things. a) he is a big lying hypocrite, or b) the scientologists got to them.

Only in hollywood would you be able to join a cult and have it be portrayed in the media as a religion. I wonder if it would be portrayed the same If Scientology, minus the celebrities had a huge membership in remote locations. I could imaging if there were a group of these people where i live, they definitely would not be considered as a religion. Religion stinks, Celebrities Stink.

lol, own'd by the man!

I'm a Scientologist and I'll tell you that this crazy story about Xenu is total crap. Some people in the press keep saying that this Xenu story is what Scientologists believe. This is such garbage and it's a story repeated over and over and is intended to keep people from looking into what Scientology actually is. So why would some in the media intentionally try and keep people away from Scientology you ask? Because most media is well paid by the pharmaceutical industry. They see Scientology as a threat to their profits because it is. Scientology has many, many answers that work and are practical. Let's look at 1 example of how the psychiatric drugging industry is hurt by Scientology technology... Let's assume you know someone who has been depressed for several months or even years. Did you know that with Scientology you can literally snap him out of his dark days and make him feel happy again, sometimes in less than five minutes. How could this be? Because Scientology helps and works like nothing else before it. There is no need to be on a psychiatric drug everyday for the rest of your life. This is just one of thousands of solutions Scientology has and it would take literally books to tell you all it has to offer and can do. Give a Scientologist just a few minutes of your time and you'll quickly realize what a sham psychiatry and the psychiatric drugging business is. It's OK to be skeptical about Scientology, but don't assume that what you've been told about it is actually true. Just ask yourself would all these celebrities be involved in it if didn’t help them and others tremendously?

HTTP://WWW.WHATISSCIENTOLOGY.ORG

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