February 27, 2006
Britney Spears might be pregnant again
Britney Spears was rushed to a Malibu hospital last week with reports saying it was to take care of her constipated son Sean Preston. However, a source has told The Scoop that she's pregnant again, saying: "She was throwing up and had stomach cramps. She’s pregnant." Britney's rep is denying the claims and insists she's not pregnant.
Considering this is at least the second story claiming she's pregnant, I'm going to go ahead and assume it's true. I'm also going to go ahead and assume drinking Red Bull and jumping off a building is a good idea. I saw on a commercial once that it gives you wings, so there's really nothing that could go wrong.
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Comments
1. Posted by gogoboots on February 27, 2006 2:22 PM
she's been looking a little pudge lately. another awful federline offspring in the works, id wager...
2. Posted by SuperSpence on February 27, 2006 2:29 PM
The federal government needs to step in and prevent this ho-down from reproducing again. How many wards of the state can California afford?
3. Posted by cj14mommy on February 27, 2006 2:32 PM
i really just hope she's too lazy to loose the weight b/c i agree she is a bit hefty, but come on- she can barely take care of the one child she has let alone two!
4. Posted by LoneWolf on February 27, 2006 2:33 PM
"She was throwing up and had stomach cramps." I understand that the stomach cramps were because she kept swallowing her tobacco juice instead of spitting it. Typical blonde redneck.
The diagnosis for why she was throwing up was a little more complicated, although reports are that she was listening to Federslime's CD immediately beforehand.
Poor Sean. Given her parenting skills he was probably so backed up that he looked a football before she realized what his problem was.
5. Posted by Devil Is Chrome on February 27, 2006 2:46 PM
Pleeaase don't tell me that her poor overworked, underappreciated nanny is the one sitting with the baby in the background! Nannies are not status symbols, but a billboard for lazy mothers.
If you're going to have a kid - then take care of it yourself.
In Britney’s case - please, have three kids and disappear.
6. Posted by DuckBoy on February 27, 2006 2:47 PM
yeah I think she is pregnant again I'm sorry to say.
I wish she'd stop reproducing with Kevin. Mainly I wish she'd comeback for a year or 2 before taking a break again.
If you look at her, her body is good except her stomach. Probably a baby...
7. Posted by Juliette on February 27, 2006 2:56 PM
I think she is pregnant too. I figure they will be the typical trailer trash family with 10 kids in tote.
8. Posted by Shaun on February 27, 2006 2:57 PM
I agree with SuperSpence on a political level. The Government should regulate celebrities from reproducing. Especially ones that drive with a infant on their lap speeding down a road; while the half wit boyfriend is yapping on a cell phone about is peanut butter song remake.
Both need a good back-hand. Some Full Metal Jacket Military training wouldn't hurt either.
"what is your malfuntion?"
9. Posted by rachel on February 27, 2006 3:01 PM
Come on guys, she needs 2 kids: one to push the gas pedal while the other one steers.
I guess her motherly way of taking care of Preston is by saying "Juanita, it's time for you to feed the damn baby."
10. Posted by blackblackheart on February 27, 2006 3:05 PM
The lettering on her shirt should be changed to "$9.95" and then a sticker should be placed on it that reads "%50 OFF!"
11. Posted by Grphdesi23 on February 27, 2006 3:07 PM
Is everyone sure that the nanny is not the same woman that killed singer Selena? I could have sworn it was her.
Maybe if you put her in a black large pinstripe shirt I could tell the difference.
12. Posted by frangly on February 27, 2006 3:07 PM
Please #5. A nanny is the ONLY way to go.
#9, that was hilarious! :-D
13. Posted by jennifer11 on February 27, 2006 3:10 PM
is anyone else laughing over the fact that she had to take her baby to the hospital for constipation?!?!?!
maybe if you stopped feeding the poor kid cheetos and colt 45 he could take a proper dump.
14. Posted by uncommonamerican on February 27, 2006 3:21 PM
It sickens me the way you people pick on retarded mothers like this. SHAME!
15. Posted by Jum on February 27, 2006 3:25 PM
so dumb and dumber mated again, looks like the world's coming to an end.
16. Posted by Xarah on February 27, 2006 3:25 PM
Jesus, Brit. What's wrong with you? I don't even like you or your music but I feel sorry for you.
17. Posted by pixelbasic on February 27, 2006 3:35 PM
Between Wacko Jacko and Brit’s offspring think of the great headlines we’ll be seeing in the next 16-18 years. Now if we could just get that Hilton slut to pump a few out...oh the stuff of dreams...such great Superficial cannon fodder!
18. Posted by ESQ on February 27, 2006 3:37 PM
Let's hope she is pregnant given the fact she looks like a large tub of dipshit. Then again if she is pregnant GOD help us all and her unborn child.
Looks like K-Douche will need to get a job as I am sure the word makes his ears bleed.
19. Posted by downshine on February 27, 2006 3:58 PM
she constantly has the nanny holding sean. thats the mark of one lazy-ass mother. she drives with her baby at the wheel, something even a dirt poor family in the amazon jungle wouldnt do, and now she wants to have another one? where is child services when you need them?
20. Posted by not-one-of-you on February 27, 2006 3:59 PM
whatta bunch of losers. how many times has anyone ever been 'rushed to the hospital' like these losers. and bitchney is one more big baby. how many women tough it out for 9 months without craving extra hyper-attention. fer crying out loud. waste products. some women give birth in the backs of cabs and you don't hear them bitching about cramps n shit. effin prima donts!
21. Posted by tracyp on February 27, 2006 4:12 PM
#9 you beat me to it. I was going to ask if she was going to have enough room on her lap, but after two?? But then realized with extra weight...not only is the answer yes, but HELL YES!!
22. Posted by fametastic on February 27, 2006 4:44 PM
A seemingly exhausted nanny looking after your baby for you? $500 a week.
Cornrows so your husband looks even more stupid? $300 and your sister's virginity.
A cheap vest stretched over your saggy, udder-like bra-free breasts? Priceless.
23. Posted by SMF121490 on February 27, 2006 4:46 PM
#11 Too funny, that is exactly what I was thinking.
Poor Sean, I sure hope he doesn't grow up thinking the nanny is his mommy. Does Brit ever nuture her own child. Or, do they not let her hold him for fear she may eat him?
Poor little baby, he will never have a normal, happy, healthy life.
24. Posted by Spindoc on February 27, 2006 4:49 PM
Has anybody seen the previews for "The Hills have Eyes"? I'm guessing that now with Federline working on his forth kid they will all move out to an abandoned urainium mine in NEvada and attack and eat lost travelers. Either that or become the next Menudo...you know, six of one, half dozen the other.
25. Posted by HughJorganthethird on February 27, 2006 5:06 PM
"She was throwing up and had stomach cramps. She’s pregnant."
Pregnant? Nahh, I'm sure she was just finding out what happens when you wash down three chilli dogs with a bag of oreo's and a half litre of Wink.
26. Posted by Pagina on February 27, 2006 6:18 PM
if i were her i would Contemplating falling down the stairs. or doing that old looosiana cajun voodoo shit her mama taught her
27. Posted by Maeve97 on February 27, 2006 6:20 PM
#13: haha!
i think it's really sad that there are so many couples out there that are incapable of having children, and then you have these idiots procreating like rabbits. kevin federline does not deserve to have 3 kids, let alone 4.
28. Posted by hahaboo6 on February 27, 2006 6:47 PM
I hope she's not pregnant. She needs to dump K-fed and move on. The girl has enough problems with the media.
29. Posted by Foxbase Alpha on February 27, 2006 6:57 PM
Mardi Gras is coming up in New Orleans, so she's gotta look 'Fat' for 'Tuesday'!
30. Posted by ESQ on February 27, 2006 7:15 PM
In response to comments #22 & #29 - awesome, LMAO!
31. Posted by Grphdesi23 on February 27, 2006 7:32 PM
WHYYY G-O-D WHYYY!
32. Posted by shelovesglitter on February 27, 2006 7:34 PM
This PROVES the end of the world is fast approaching!
33. Posted by Chris'sMom on February 27, 2006 7:42 PM
This is when the phrase 'mandatory sterilization' comes to mind. Maybe she got pregnant because she was 'trying to get away from the paparazzi'.
She should just have Frito-Lay construct a cheeto manufacturing plant in her kitchen. Then all she would have to do is tell Sean to go to ownstairs instead of putting him on her lap to drive to the store.
34. Posted by Darby on February 27, 2006 8:04 PM
Ahhhh gross. Why do these people make more?
35. Posted by pinkraindrop6 on February 27, 2006 8:24 PM
okay i thought a while ago it said that she never let anyone hold her baby. not even kevin. judging by the picture in the background it looks like she really doesn't care.
36. Posted by lomies on February 27, 2006 8:27 PM
Have a Frito-Lay plant in her kitchen? Helllllllllll no! She should have get herself a house constructed of Cheetos!!
37. Posted by Sheva on February 27, 2006 8:44 PM
K-dick just guaranteed himself another bigger payout.
Once she squeezes out another puppy it's ka-ching.
Now he can go back out and impregnate some more Char types.
38. Posted by HollyJ on February 27, 2006 9:19 PM
Why is it that Rhodes Scholars and Mensa members have infertility problems, whilst skum-sucking ignorant assholes are more fertile than a clan of Mormon wives?
I want to understand Darwin's recent push towards populating the earth with morons. I WANT TO UNDERSTAND IT! WHYYYYYYYYYY???
39. Posted by krisdylee on February 27, 2006 9:25 PM
ha hahahahahhhahahahahhhahahhahhhahahhh
sniff...
40. Posted by justforkicks on February 27, 2006 9:32 PM
Brit, hang in there. You are still beautiful. We all need help with our kids sometimes; especially when your hubby isn't around. Don't feel bad for needing the assistance of a nanny every now and again or for not losing every single pound gained during pregnancy; especially when you are going through the end of your marriage. You're young, you're beautiful, you have a great career and family, and you have a beautiful baby. That's all you need. Dump the garbage and laugh all the way to the bank.
41. Posted by energy_guru on February 27, 2006 10:00 PM
Red Bull does give you wings. I've tried it. Brittney should really start drinking Red Bull or maybe even sugar free Red Bull. The caffeine and some of the energy ingredients might help her shed the massive pounds she has put on.
42. Posted by evelyn on February 27, 2006 10:27 PM
In the February 2006 issue of People Magazine, Britney Spears was interviewed, ordering a mango margarita.
http://www.gobritney.com/album4294/britney-spears-4294-88735.html
With this new information, the list of possibilities regarding Britney's ballooning weight has now been narrowed down to TWO possibilities:
1) She's not pregnant, she's just FAT from cheetos and liquor.
OR
2) She IS indeed pregnant, and she's promoting fetal alcohol syndrome.
Personally, I wouldn't be surprised at all if the second idea was occuring. Deep down, I'm kind of even anticipating it.
Perhaps spawning a retarted baby due to her irresponsible behavior will wake up Britney to the real world. Maybe she'll even stop producing shitty music and, instead, begin doing something productive in her life: campagning for responsible parenting, perhaps?
43. Posted by justforkicks on February 27, 2006 10:30 PM
she's not pregnant
44. Posted by Chris'sMom on February 27, 2006 10:43 PM
#36...If she had her house made out cheetos she would be homeless before she popped out this other demon seed. Then what would she do. I guess she could go stay at one of K-Feds whores, I mean, 'friends' house.
45. Posted by networkchick on February 27, 2006 11:29 PM
#13, the best comment!!
Maybe Nanny Consuelo McPhee fed Sean too much arroz, poor kid has spackle in his bowels!! Nothing that a little prune juice or molasses in his bottle won't cure.
46. Posted by TaiTai on February 27, 2006 11:49 PM
You'd be vomiting and have stomach cramps too if you were married to K-Fed. She shoulda thought of that earlier.
47. Posted by misssives on February 28, 2006 12:00 AM
Good luck to them I say.
48. Posted by hafaball on February 28, 2006 1:49 AM
HollyJ, it's very simple, Fertility Drugs! There was recently a 62 year old bumpkin that had a kid, maybe soon I will too... O.o
49. Posted by slinkhard on February 28, 2006 5:44 AM
'Nannies are not status symbols, but a billboard for lazy mothers.'
And fathers too, presumably, 5?
I fully support Brit using a nanny, personally. The nanny is undoubtedly a trained child-care professional, who knows enough not to try with an infant on her lap.
50. Posted by NJboy1967 on February 28, 2006 6:49 AM
QUICK! CALL SOCIAL SERVICES.
51. Posted by ShanDourdan on February 28, 2006 7:00 AM
I'm sorry but there is a difference between having a nanny around for 'occasional support' and being so freaking lazy that you can't be bothered to get off your lazy ass and feed your own son, yet tell the world "I only let my mum hold my baby" Bull.Shit.
52. Posted by veggi on February 28, 2006 7:20 AM
#13- haaaaaaaa!
I hope she's saying "I don't know who my baby's daddy is"
53. Posted by Madonna on February 28, 2006 7:29 AM
Britney is not pregnent. I asked her, "Brit, fat or pregnent?" She said fat. She wants to do another album and tour before the next one. Time to make some cash. She only has one Mexican left to hold the baby.
54. Posted by Tetsuo on February 28, 2006 7:55 AM
Argh! Those two dumb pieces of redneck shit are popping out ANOTHER worthless, unloved child and here I am not having been laid in two fucking months! It's not fair! On the plus side, at least the kid's likely to start out intellectually superior to his old man. Assuming Brotney hasn't been banging the pool boy on the side while K-Fed's been passed out on the couch from too much weed.
55. Posted by jugsgirl on February 28, 2006 9:14 AM
silly britney,
when your baby is constipated ~ shake him ~ don't take him to the hospital.
shake all the poop out.
56. Posted by Chris'sMom on February 28, 2006 9:43 AM
#55...Priceless, but don't give her any ideas.
57. Posted by dodah1 on February 28, 2006 11:03 AM
If I looked like Britney, I'd be vomiting too. The girl is over. She'll never have a comeback, and it's all her own damn fault. Get a kneck Britney, yikes!
58. Posted by Don'tPanic on February 28, 2006 11:25 AM
At least have the decency to feed your own kid if you're just gonna stand there looking dumb. What is she doing in that photo that would stop her from feeding her child?
59. Posted by Spindoc on February 28, 2006 11:28 AM
#55, LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh God! I almost choked when I read that. LOL!!!!!!!!!!! Priceless.
60. Posted by thisone on February 28, 2006 11:30 AM
#58 - duh, she's shopping. That's always more important right? It's funny, you would think that if she was talented enough to drive safely with her son in her lap on the PCH then she would be talented enough to walk and feed her baby at the same time!
61. Posted by Don'tPanic on February 28, 2006 1:47 PM
Of course, shopping.
I managed to do all sorts of things and feed my baby at the same time, (breast feed even), not the least of which was shopping. But then, I'm just a peasant who can't afford a nanny to raise my child for me.
But someone brought up a good point, better a nanny than Britney. She seems too ignorant to handle a child all by herself.
62. Posted by Zed on February 28, 2006 2:23 PM
I loved the picture of her in Hawaii sitting on the beach NEXT TO the nanny who was busy feeding Sean. So Britney can't even feed Sean when she's relaxing in Hawaii!?!
Hey, she's a priceless PRINCESS, you guys! Get over it!
63. Posted by Lala on February 28, 2006 4:14 PM
If she's drunk, fat, shopping, chewing tobacco, and not pregnant now, it doesn't matter because she'll get pregnant eventually.
And if she is pregnant now, she won't be alone, because the Sperminator will not rest. He has to spread his seed. It's not a matter of if, but when.
64. Posted by LaydeeBug on February 28, 2006 8:56 PM
YAWWWWWWWWWNNNNNNNN! (falls asleep before finishing yawn)
65. Posted by The Great Satan on March 1, 2006 6:46 PM
odds are better than 2-1 that her nanny isn't legal.
66. Posted by Fred on May 10, 2006 2:48 PM
The nanny is feeding the baby because Bitchney had to run back to the car to get more Cheetos and beer.