Jan 19 2006K-Fed plans to open a nightclub
Kevin Federline reportedly wants to open a Vegas nightclub, according to In Touch Weekly. The magazine reports that there’s a bit of a hitch because Kevin needs to get the money from his wife, who’s none-too-happy with the idea of her spouse spending his time in a nightclub.
A friend says, “The last place Britney wants Kevin to be spending his nights is in a nightclub, even if he’s the owner.” Still, Federline has persuaded Britney to talk to the owners of the Palms Hotel and Casino in Las Vegas, about the possibility of his opening a nightclub there.
Goddamn it must be nice to be married to Britney. The girl can't say no to anything. And she should, because "hey Britney can I build a nightclub?" or "Hey Britney, five milkshakes, twenty minutes - think you can?" or "Hey Britney, why don't we give the baby some weed?" are questions with only one right answer. And the answer is to tattoo the words "boy toy" on Kevin's ass and drop him in prison.
Reader Comments
1. ESQ - January 19, 2006 10:14 AM
First comment : )
Britney please take out your garbage already, it sinks!
2. gossipmonger - January 19, 2006 10:20 AM
OMG, he's going to "try his hand at everything", use every last cent of Brit's to do it, then he'll dump her fat ass when he's bled her dry. Then him 'n Paris can hook up... Then he'll secretly film Ricky Martin pissing all over Paris in the shower, and then he'll sell it on the internet... (with Paris' permission of course.. hey, any publicity is good, as long as they spell your name right?)
3. uncommonamerican - January 19, 2006 10:31 AM
Britney should be more supportive. A fly nightclub on the Strip is her only hope of ever having a singing career again. And if that fails - prostitution.
4. juicylips - January 19, 2006 10:40 AM
why is he still breathing? he shouldve suffocated under Brit big fat ass by now.
5. SuperSpence - January 19, 2006 10:50 AM
If I had a choice between giving my money to Kevin Federline or putting my money into a brown paper bag and then lighting the bag on fire and then throwing that flaming bag of money off a cliff into the Atlantic Ocean, I'd choose the bag option. The money is gone either way, but at least with the bag option I'd have the pleasure of watching K-Fed jump off that cliff in pursuit of my cash.
6. PapaHotNuts - January 19, 2006 11:56 AM
SuperSpence- you have been absolutely genius lately!
7. SuperSpence - January 19, 2006 12:00 PM
Thanks, Papa. Let's give credit where credit is due. The celebs set 'em up, I just knock 'em down.
8. PapaHotNuts - January 19, 2006 12:05 PM
This guy couldn't get a job stocking green beans at Wal-Mart, but now he's gonna be a nightclub owner? Why is God punishing us?
He should name it "Douche" but pronounce it "Doo-shay" so it sounds all French-like.
9. SuperSpence - January 19, 2006 12:34 PM
He should name it "Douche" but pronounce it "Doo-shay" so it sounds all French-like.
REPLY: Not only is that brilliant, I'd give it at least a 50% chance of success if someone actually proposed it to K-Fed.
10. Jayne - January 19, 2006 12:53 PM
I'd honestly go to his club.
And urinate everywhere.
11. BuffyH - January 19, 2006 1:07 PM
Someone should beat this mug over the head with his own shin bone. Honestly.
12. John - January 19, 2006 1:26 PM
Why doesn't he just use his millions from being a rap star? Sorry guys, I couldn't type this one out without laughing. I went for it but knew I'd crack up.
13. Jenny - January 19, 2006 1:45 PM
Instead of trying to think of new titles for all of your posts about K-Fed, you should just stick with, "K-Fed is an Idiot" for all of them. Cause no matter what you end up writing in the post, that title will be appropriate.
14. Zed - January 19, 2006 2:19 PM
I just watched K-Fed's Access Hollywood interview, in which he speaks of PopoZao as his "masterpiece of a song."
I'm still laughing! This guy cracks me up totally. Can the words "masterpiece" and "song" be any more inappropriate?
15. Kelly - January 19, 2006 2:34 PM
Man needs an easy way to spread his seed. She is hella stupid if she goes thru with it. I mean is like letting a recovering crack head live with Bobby and Whitney, open access.
16. HughJorganthethird - January 19, 2006 4:54 PM
Try his hand at everything eh? Why not a restaurant K-fed?
"International House of Douchebags" perhaps?
17. BadGoat - January 19, 2006 6:43 PM
Britney - you are so stupid! You have two little boys at home, one of them being your husband.
Karma works in mysterious ways, don't it?
18. mrschickee - January 19, 2006 8:19 PM
Papa & SuperSpence - You guys are cracking me up. Thanks for the laugh!
19. HollyJ - January 19, 2006 8:27 PM
"Hey Britney, let's open a whore house in Las Vegas!" is the next step, followed by, "Hey Britney, I'm gonna go hit some Vegas clam!"
I suspect that Nevada hooker clam is better than Brit's Louisiana crab trap. (Someone pass the lemon)
20. vida - January 20, 2006 1:57 AM
Even if he's the owner? Don't u mean 'especially' if he's the owner? Cuz otherwise, the only time he'd get noticed was if you wanted your table cleared and gave him your empties....if then.
21. DannyJames - January 20, 2006 11:46 AM
Kevin Federline must have a huge Tommy Lee dick or somethin cuz why else would Britney put up him?
22. thegmanifesto - March 5, 2006 8:08 PM
This would have to be the worst club ever....but probably on par with most clubs in vegas.
23. HollywoodSnark - December 13, 2006 9:42 AM
yeah, the club's called 'Moocher'
http://hollywoodsnark.com