Sep 16 2005Jessica Alba wears bikinis to beaches
There are a couple of reasons why Jessica Alba is awesome. First of all is her ability to make other woman want to murder themselves because they look like a bag of feces compared to her. Secondly, despite the knowledge that half the world will masturbate to her photographs, she continually makes public appearances in bikinis that looks so good they make other women look like bags of feces. Oh, and did I mention that if you're not Jessica Alba you look like a bag of feces? Because you do. And it's gross.
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Reader Comments
1. smock7 - September 19, 2005 1:47 PM
First of all, dearest God Almight holy Jesus from heaven and all this is great in this universe. Wow.
Secondly, who is the goober she is with? I was hoping it was her brother and that she has an A. Jolie-style sibling connection.
2. K-dawg - September 19, 2005 1:56 PM
I think that is the douchbag b/f Cash Warren. Why do hot girls always go for the losers. And for some reason I want to stick my tongue in her butt.
3. Chas - September 19, 2005 3:50 PM
I hit it.
4. Tommy Cruise - September 19, 2005 4:23 PM
Why are her clothes on? I though all female celebrities are supposed to be nude on the beach. I think someone photochopped a bikini on her.
See, this proves I'm not gay. Right?
5. Gerry - September 19, 2005 4:46 PM
Nope.
6. Tacos Supreme - September 19, 2005 6:33 PM
God damn I want to fill all her holes.
7. techakke - September 19, 2005 9:14 PM
Retouched one of them to remove dude's leg..
http://flickr.com/photos/18968374@N00/43951675/
8. BRAYEZ - September 20, 2005 1:23 AM
nice ASS
9. Juliette - September 21, 2005 12:43 PM
She is smoking!
I'd kill to have her bod...it is so natural & feminine looking.
10. Wild1 - September 22, 2005 4:06 AM
That guy sitting next to her looks like he's enjoying the show. He should be pitching a monster-sized tent, but his crotch is flatter than Paris Hilton's ass. Must be her hairdresser.
11. Proteon - September 22, 2005 12:41 PM
Lordy lordy lordy.
12. sexydarin - September 24, 2005 3:45 AM
Who needs viagra or levitra, with jessica alba around i have a hard on that would last all the waking hours of my day. I would lick her from head to toe and everywhere in between. And yeah i would stick my tongue up her ass, too. The feminine form to perfection. 99% of the celebrity women are ugly. Jessica is one of the best if not the best out there.
13. 3xthreat - September 25, 2005 11:52 AM
I think the guy isn't bad looking. and i'm not gay..
14. shacked - September 26, 2005 7:49 PM
These are dudes who don't like azz.
15. shacked - September 26, 2005 7:52 PM
Shyt is skinny...where are the hips? Her face is aight but she got no azz.
16. Bill Clinton - December 14, 2005 11:02 PM
She can eat puppies live and piss on small children for all I care....just get naked damnit!
17. bootface - February 1, 2006 5:37 PM
oh my god...yeah thats it..thats it baby..yeah yeah OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH....whew
18. SweeterSweeterBoyfriendStealer! - April 1, 2006 10:28 AM
she does have a cute butt!
so do i (giggles!) i like her tan, but im sorry, i still think carmen electra is #1 !
XO all :)
19. SweeterSweeterBoyfriendStealer! - April 1, 2006 10:48 AM
"Oh, and did I mention that if you're not Jessica Alba you look like a bag of feces? Because you do. And it's gross."
says the paragraph by her pic....
sorry, although i look NOTHING like her, I disagree! i was born in sweden along with my moms entire fam, and my dad and his entire fam were born and raied in ireland. that makes me 50%swedish ( and you KNOW how hot us swedes are! ;) ) and 50% irish. shes tall, like 5'7 and im only 5 feet tall ( irish girls are as small as leprochauns!;) ), 98-104 lbs but NOT anorexic! its all about being HEALHTY. like i said, i workout for about 3 to 4 hours a day, cardio, pilates, weight training, 30 mins of lunges and squats ( for the bum, which works!!!) belly dancing, and an hour of ab work, which kills but its so WORTH it!!! and like i said, shes danish, mexican, native american and i think french? so, likei said, i dont look a thing like her, see im pale, i have white blonde hair ( all natural thank you--promise, even doen THERE !! ;) but i dont think i look "like feces" compared to her!!!! classy, whoever wrote that, real classy
20. SweeterSweeterBoyfriendStealer! - April 1, 2006 10:49 AM
PS jessie's healthy looking too :)