Aug 17 2005Jude Law has a small penis
The NY Post reports that pictures of Jude Law changing into a swimsuit outside his mother's house in France reveal that he has a small wiener. I'd say it more professionally, but I think small wiener really sums up everything you need to know.
"He's no Tommy Lee, that's for sure," sighed one unimpressed publicist who viewed copies of the paparazzi pix obtained by PAGE SIX.
Late yesterday afternoon, e-mail images of the photos were being forwarded around the offices of Women's Wear Daily under the headline "Jude in the Nude in France," and accompanied by a not-so-subtle dig at Law's loins: "Ha!"
I haven't seen the pictures myself, but I'm just going to pretend that I have and say that his wiener was about 1.2" long. And I'm talking erect here, folks. Lord knows why he would have an erection after swimming outside his mother's home, but that's the story I've made up and I'm sticking to it. I don't want to imply that he has erotic feelings towards his own mother, but any man who cheats on his beautiful fiance with an ugly nanny isn't completely right in the head and probably has a small penis. Scratch that, definitely has a small penis. A 1.2" penis to be exact.
*Update: Okay, so maybe 1.2" was slightly exaggerated. His penis does, however, look like a weird little monster. Some very NSFW pictures of the thing after the jump.
Thanks to the wonderfully sexy Meredith for the images.
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Reader Comments
1. AmberDextrose - January 24, 2006 4:30 AM
You know, it makes me so mad. When my mum still lived in France she knew Jude's mum (all the ex-pat Brits hang out together). Now we all know how keen he is to wap his knob out, I feel I missed an opportunity to view it for myself. Damn, damn, damn. Why the hell didn't my mother ever mention that one of her friends had a hot filmstar-to-be son who banged like an outhouse door in a storm? Even if he does have a small wiener.
2. mags - January 24, 2006 9:56 AM
Ick, uncircumsized.
But poor guy...so he's a grower, not a shower!
3. Danny - January 26, 2006 1:19 AM
Who cares if hes "uncut". He is till one of the hottest guys in the world and i wouldnt mind letting him have his way with me!!!!
Call me jude ;)
4. austin1151 - January 30, 2006 1:37 PM
a) this is not a "small weiner" b)this is not a fully erect weiner c)that 2nd half of erection can produce some amazing increase in size (trust me on this if you are of little experience)d)that he is uncut is hot e) whoever "meredtih' is, she should be ashamed of herself, along with every other person ogling these pics. Jude Law is a man who has the same rights to privacy as anyone else. How would any of you oglers feel if some scum paparazzi snapped a shot of you naked and unawares, then spread it all over the net? all of us, as human beings, should treat each other with compassion. This unwarranted trashing of a man by secret photos should make each and every reader of this awful site ashamed of participating, myself included.
5. fred123254 - February 7, 2006 7:06 PM
How sad that society's obsession with penis size leads someone to make such stupid comments on a perfectly fine and no doubt very serviceable male member. Any NORMAL woman would be delighted to have his cock inside her.
For the truth about whether or not penis size matters to women, see
http://www.the-penis-website.com/index.html
and for a review of how it matters to men, see
http://www.the-penis-website.com/size1a.html
6. A. Nonomous - May 12, 2006 12:49 PM
That is much bigger than mine.
mine is smaller than that when fully erect
7. dunworryboutit1 - May 26, 2006 3:48 PM
how can you judge someone on their flaccid size? Firsr of all hes completely soft there, maybe even a little shrivvled. Does the public not understand how the penis works? Second of all, Tommy Lee isnt even that big. Way to much hype surrounds this guy. He is often boasted as 9 and 10 inches, which is a complete lie. Tommy is 7-7.5 inches max, and news flash, his soft penis isnt that far ahead of Judes.
Mr. Superhung doesnt look so big here does here?
http://www.stars-masculines-nues.com/Tommy%20Lee.jpg
Than you see him erect
http://www.stars-masculines-nues.com/tommylee01.jpg
8. FecalPellets - June 24, 2006 6:08 PM
^^^^NOw THAT'S a cock!!